02-03-2017, 11:26 PM
He was a fool. He knew it the most in the way she settled near but apart from him, keeping distance. He was an idiot to think they could go back, even for a moment. He had already destroyed this. Whatever it was. It was what he did, destroyed everything. He swallowed the pain of her distance, the lack of her touch. This was his life now. Emptiness and pain. Inside and out.
Her wings lifted -his eyes flickered- but she only resettled them around herself. Of course she did. Why would she do any different.
He rolled carefully to his side, his spine toward her, and exhaled a heavy sigh. He wasn't sure what he had been thinking. What had Zoryn told her in the forest? He couldn't even remember. Certainly enough that she should be demanding answers, or simply walking away and forgetting him. Instead, she healed him, she stayed, she lay near. How much more of her would he steal before he was satisfied? How much pain must she be in even now and burying it deeper than his own. If she really felt anything for him before, that is. He wasn't sure.
His neck stretched and he slid his head closer to her, pressing against her foreleg. If it was all he would get, he would take it. As he always did, take and steal from her. It was just barely a touch, but the rest of the tension eased and he sighed again.
He knew he couldn't stay here. He couldn't keep putting them through this. Whatever it was. And he needed sleep. He would have to claim it the only way he knew how anymore. Then retrieve his daughter, take her home and raise her. Alone. Cerva wasn't really coming, was she? Had she ever intended to? He smothered the thoughts, drowned them in darkness and pushed them away. First, sleep. Then, whatever came next.
With a weary groan, he dragged himself slowly to his feet, swayed with dizziness. His eyes closed as he waited for the world to steady beneath him. When he finally opened them again, he looked at her. Blank, empty, sad. What had he done to her? Why did she bother staying now? He didn't deserve any of this, and even she knew it. His muzzle fell towards her, but like her own movements earlier, he stopped before he could touch her.
This time, he didn't whisper Ischia. This time he didn't whisper anything. Left her without the tenderness, without the heat. Without a word. He only turned, taking stumbling steps away until his body woke up enough to walk again, his head hanging. It was time to seek the blackness.
Time to fight until he collapsed.
Her wings lifted -his eyes flickered- but she only resettled them around herself. Of course she did. Why would she do any different.
He rolled carefully to his side, his spine toward her, and exhaled a heavy sigh. He wasn't sure what he had been thinking. What had Zoryn told her in the forest? He couldn't even remember. Certainly enough that she should be demanding answers, or simply walking away and forgetting him. Instead, she healed him, she stayed, she lay near. How much more of her would he steal before he was satisfied? How much pain must she be in even now and burying it deeper than his own. If she really felt anything for him before, that is. He wasn't sure.
His neck stretched and he slid his head closer to her, pressing against her foreleg. If it was all he would get, he would take it. As he always did, take and steal from her. It was just barely a touch, but the rest of the tension eased and he sighed again.
He knew he couldn't stay here. He couldn't keep putting them through this. Whatever it was. And he needed sleep. He would have to claim it the only way he knew how anymore. Then retrieve his daughter, take her home and raise her. Alone. Cerva wasn't really coming, was she? Had she ever intended to? He smothered the thoughts, drowned them in darkness and pushed them away. First, sleep. Then, whatever came next.
With a weary groan, he dragged himself slowly to his feet, swayed with dizziness. His eyes closed as he waited for the world to steady beneath him. When he finally opened them again, he looked at her. Blank, empty, sad. What had he done to her? Why did she bother staying now? He didn't deserve any of this, and even she knew it. His muzzle fell towards her, but like her own movements earlier, he stopped before he could touch her.
This time, he didn't whisper Ischia. This time he didn't whisper anything. Left her without the tenderness, without the heat. Without a word. He only turned, taking stumbling steps away until his body woke up enough to walk again, his head hanging. It was time to seek the blackness.
Time to fight until he collapsed.
