In this heart, this barless prison [Kimber, Ygritte/Kreios]

[Nymphetamine]

He left the group of Chamberlings frustrated and annoyed with himself. Nothing seemed to help with how to handle the situation he’d gone and gotten himself into with the blue mare. He had torn off into the tall trees that stood guard around Chamber and didn’t look back to see if the blue mare had followed. Part of him hoped she didn’t follow, as he didn’t think he could stand his own embarrassment, nor her harsh tones as he surely deserved a stiff word or two from the only mare that could drive him as crazy as she did. The spring sun was bright above him as he rushed away from chamber, rushed head first into another task, another mission, anything to not deal with any matter of the heart. Around him birds chirped and there were signs of new life—if you were willing to look beyond the scars the war had left on his dear Chamber. Underfoot, new grasses pushed up through the thick laid ash, all around him things started anew. The blood stained brown stallion was not able to follow suit, even deep down he longed to, deep down he wanted to not feel the constant ache for the blue mare, deep down he didn’t know how to do it.

A loud snap of a branch under the pressure of a hoof made him realize the object of his (currently unknown) affection had indeed followed him. She was rapidly moving closer, and he physically tensed as he waited for her words- his verbal lashing that was so very deserved, but none came. So he moved on, and Kimber stayed as she was, both bodies silently moving out of Chamber and into other lands as they worked towards Falls. The silence stretched for far too long, as they moved at hastened pace to the last known place their daughter had been spotted. For far too long his black dipped hooves pounded against the giving soil of the spring ground. The silence was so thick he didn’t know how to break it, any words he thought of were too flippant, too superficial, and quaint. Nymphetamine snapped his mouth shut time and time again, as nothing he thought to say was right. Eventually, he slowed as his muscles ached and he needed to rest. They were near a stream and he moved to it and lowered his head to drink. The cool spring waters washed over him and instantly set an icy feeling over his throat. It was the type of cold that you could follow as it moved down your throat and coated your stomach. It was an oddly comforting feeling, that he took momentary relief in it. Anything to distract him from the weight of Kimber’s stare on him. He knew she looked upon him, knew he had not been fair, knew she would soon say something as she always broke the silence first when neither of them knew what to say.

And then she did, she spoke, and it wasn’t the harsh angry words he had hoped for. She had spoken calmly, straightforward and simply. He wished she had been angry, he could hide behind anger, he knew how to postpone having the real talk they so desperately needed behind the façade of passionate anger. He knew he couldn’t hide behind her simple plea, to not berate and belittle her so publically. The stallion who was so very plain next to her “smurf butt blue” hue visually sank, his head held low, he froze himself there as he mentally pieced together how to move forward with the conversation that would follow. The moment held for what felt like an eternity, words piled together, formed and reformed. The time felt like an eternity, an internal life that he composed and conducted as if it were a grand symphony which ended in the most delicate of fades to give way to his true life. Nymphetamine exhaled and picked himself up as he turned to face the blue mare with the deep complex eyes. At first, he was sheepish in the knowledge she didn’t fully deserve the verbal lashings he so hastily dealt. ”I’m… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said those things back there. It was wrong, I just… Words failed him as the previous revelation that she was important to him came crashing back to the forefront of his mind. His eyes flashed with the weight of it, her life, her feelings, her well-being mattered to him more deeply than he ever previously thought. Kimber, the infuriating mare with the sharp tongue, was the only one who seemed to make him take notice of the larger picture. He could not keep stuffing this away to linger behind the false front of anger. If he ever hoped to move forward, in any way they had to have this talk.

He didn’t move, though something in him said he should reach to her he held still. They had been too tremulous and unstable to go there. He searched over her, looking for any sign that she thought him other than sincere, he needed her to believe him. He knew it was the only way he could go forward. If she were unable to believe him, he would have to close the door he was so close to opening. He doubted he would ever go there again, not after Keeva. The bay wouldn’t put himself out there again just for Kimber to just leave him high and dry like a joke. His words felt heavier than normal, as if they didn’t want to leave his throat, that they needed more air. Though when they finally did leave him to flow through the air they sounded normal- deep and full of feeling. ”It’s just that for whatever reason, it’s different with you. Obviously you know I’ve been with others since… and I have never cared if they told me about a possible foal from the time we spent together. I…I don’t mean to over share, I don’t know how… I---I just mean to say that I wanted that time with Vessel and Vaughan when they were young, it mattered to me, and I didn’t know that until the time was past and I could do nothing about it. I, I handled it all poorly…I know.”

He dared moving closer to her, not sure if she understood everything he tried to say, he wasn’t even sure of the depth of the feeling he held within him and knew he should keep them to himself until he knew for certain. But the necromancer knew he was ready to not harbor such bitter feelings towards Kimber. His hooves stopped him close enough to reach out to her, but far enough away he could react and pull away if she was still upset with him (and let’s face it, she wasn’t one or physical contact so one never knew with the spicy blue mare). Everything seemed to still as he reached out with his blackened muzzle, took in her scent, and lipped at her own muzzle in apology. His ebony pools danced with the weight that lifted from his shoulders even though he hadn’t actually heard her reply. Still, the conjurer held still as he shared the space with the mare. Even if only for a moment, it was nice to just be in the same place with Kimber and not feel the anxiety he had prior. He waited for a reply, a nod, a snort, anything. The moment was going to have to end soon enough as they both had a mission at hand, but he hoped to hold out for just a while longer. To soak in the feeling that they understood each other was was he needed more now than ever.

After another long pause the blood bay dared a final revelation with the blue mare. Look with this whole Vessel thing, be careful, yeah? Don’t go and be a hero… I don’t think I could handle it if something happened to you.” His tone grew serious and he searched her eyes, gazed into their depths, anchoring his words as deeply within her as she would allow. The words echoed in him mind and between them as the necromancer realized that it sounded too much like a confession of love and back peddled to lighten the mood ”You know… because I’d have to go find someone else to fight with… and to infuriate. It would just be a lot of work for me.” A smile, and light nip at her shoulder topped off the attempt to hide the depth of his feelings about the mare. The sun wasn’t going to stay high in the sky for them to continue their banter but he waited for her to say she was ready to move off. His heart raced as he replayed what he had shared and he had no clue what would come of it, but the saucy mare would surely have something to say.

The breeze picked up and Kimber was ready to go so he continued on to Falls. The rest of the way there was filled with different levels of conversation, though mostly silence and discussion of how to go about finding Vessel. They thundered together over the lands until the gentle landscape of Falls appeared before them. Floral notes and misty humid air floated to tickle his nose. He scanned the borderlands; Falls was nothing like Chamber and he understood what the sweet caring girl had seen here. He glanced at Kimber before he gave a curt nod and announced their presence. Someone here had to know something about their daughter, and he surely hoped they would be useful. He was tense, Chamber and Falls didn’t have a great relationship and he doubted the first instinct would be to expect a friendly visit. The lanky russet desert racer took strength from the fact that neither he nor Kimber would rest until Vessel was found and that they could work together in this at least. In that knowledge he took his solitude as he waited for the next step in their journey to unfold.

Nymphetamine

cold was my soul, untold was the pain I faced when you left me: a rose in the rain

OOC: please allow @[k i m b e r] to reply first, then whomever else. <3