Time is so relative. Time can be as quick as a hummingbird’s wing through the summer air, or as slow as watching flowers come to full bloom. Time was a terrible way to judge the span of days that had separated the blood bay from the object of his infatuation. Infatuation? No… it was more- but he was not sure what. He didn’t know where it this would go, where it had gone. They spent a period of time together before he started his job… the job he can’t tell here about… the job that would put her in danger if things went south. He shouldn't see her now- he was not alone- never alone anymore, due to the invisible raven upon his back. Well he was never really alone- not ever- not with the pull of the dead ever present in his mind. He ignores it most days- it was just part of being a necromancer, something he thought he had lost when he fled his home, but had resurfaced while in Chamber. The blood bay didn’t seem to care, didn’t want to care about his babysitting fowl, he wanted to see her; needed to see her. There was simply something he needed to do, to say, to check on. Keeva.
The time he spent away from her had been quick to him at times…quick as he convinced Straia that he was truly wishing to spy for Chamber, not against.- adrenaline coursing through him keeping him awake and ready. It was then his necromancy came back (lucky for him) it had been a turning point, helped get him from the cage, and keep the Raven Queen interested in his usefulness. It had been slow too. Slow as he waited for Straia to give him the information he was aloud to share. Slow as he waited for a believable amount of time before he left to reunite with Mast. Slow as he stood in shadows and aside in conversations listening for interesting tidbits of information to share with either side he was a believed spy for. It was consuming. And while the fae with lavender eyes was a soft hum in the back of his mind constantly, she was often just that- background. He still thought of her often- just the time had eased the constant thoughts, and he had to have that or else those thoughts would have endangered him and her.
Chamber was intoxicating, the power, the possibilities, the strange and intriguing inhabitants all settled around you in this haze. It took hold and started burrowing in- slowly making you its own. When he originally met Killdare he was appalled once he learned of Chamber and that Killdare would be from such a place. Nymphetamine shook his head, as if he was shaking the fog away- trying to remember. Chamber set fire to Gates- and he wanted to revenge Gates for them….and to get his closure on his on family’s demise. He still wanted that… but he would be lying if he said he didn’t feel the draw of Chamber.
His thoughts were jarred as a wind pulled a familiar scent to him on a chilled autumn breeze. There were floral notes, soft and feminine, the crisp clean cent of grass… but there was something that was different- missing. His nostrils flared pulling in the scent, his eyes widened with recognition Keeva. She was here… but why had her scent changed? What had changed, what had happened while he was gone? It was then he saw her. From the distance he thought she moved a little differently, the muscles didn’t seem as pliant…. or there was something else undetectable from this position, or even he just didn't remember that detail. He perked up as she called his name, pausing before reacting, waiting to hear her intonation. He exhaled when it was upbeat- happy- at least for now. Keeva!
She was upon him quickly, muzzle taking him in, melding into him. There he realized she didn’t have the scent of the other stallion upon her anymore; that she no longer smelled of her herd’s lands. She simple smelled of the meadow. The meadow with the beaten down grasses, yellowed from the intense heat of the sun all summer long. He looked over her, taking a step back as to look at her better- big picture. His eyes hardened as he looked her over, her eyes were the same shining pools he remembered, but held sadness too, and they weren’t as vibrant anymore. He rare hide seemed to hang a little looser on her frame. She wasn’t starved no- but she wasn’t fit- she looked as if she had been withering away in his absence. The young stag’s eyes softened- She had been through something rough while he was away- and he knew not if it was due to him. Tell me, did your old stag do this to you? Tell me and I will take care of him. His voice was firm and serious. He would open the ground up and have the fleshy heathens he controls pull him down to their eternal resting place. He didn't understand this change, his thoughts whirled with scenarios. Why had she been living in the meadow?? He needed to know, he would pull that cowardly beast apart had the stallion neglected his charge.
Nymphetamine was still scanning her checking to make sure she was fine when she said she thought he was done for good. He froze, and looked at her eyes, so full of emotion and went back to her side, pressing against her, reassuring her he was there. He heard her whimper- not sure what cocktail of emotion had caused it. Now Now, I’m not going anywhere---for good. I told you I owed you an explanation. I could go anywhere for good, and not give you that explanation. I’m here. His words were light at the start, a small chuckle- the idea of him being stolen way was amusing to him, but his words grew serious and more reassuring. She seemed more fragile than before, like the spark was dampened. Internally Nymphetamine felt guilt fill him- he had caused this. While Keeva didn’t come straight out and say it- he figured he was a large factor. He took several deep breaths against her skin. I thought of you often….I am ashamed in the way I left you.
He felt the invisible raven upon his back, he had forgotten for a moment it was there. Straia said it was a constant reminder of her ever watching eyes- he hoped her other ravens were giving her more interesting information at the time. He focused back on Keeva, pushing the bird away out of his mind, Straia be damned. I just wanted to protect you- and I still want to protect you- but I couldn’t stand not looking for you. I had to make sure you were still ok. Keeva, I should have come sooner…. He trailed off, anger and guilt racking through him. He hated that he surely had a part in her weakened state. How could he. How dare he. He stilled against her as he internalized these thoughts. He would have to do better- be better. He knew not how he would do right by her and do his jobs for gates and chamber—but he would have to find a way… he wouldn’t leave her alone in the meadow to shrink away in to nothingness.
Nymphetamine
in my heart, that barless prison
discolours all with tunnel vision