 I can remember a time when I was so afraid when even my shadow wouldn't follow me Arriving in Hyaline had been difficult. Not because Kensa had been unwelcoming, but it was the first time Elaina felt like she as truly never returning back to her family. There had been a calm, bright glow that surrounded Elaina, swirling colors in a rush of memories before her eyes, tangible and smiling, Lilli, Alvaro, Marcelo, Ori…she could almost feel them as their faces pressed into hers desperately, searching so hard for the part of her they lost. A single tear had slid down her face (she would allow no more to fall), the ache in her heart too deep, a silence had wrapped around her, nothing but Elaina’s only breathing and her heartbeat. She left so much behind back there, in Beyond, the place of family and love, the place she had lived most of her life after her parents had died. But eventually, something had given and she had reached the end of some road, and even her beloved Aerwir could not hold Elaina where she stood, so broken and writhing for escape, for anything, but that land and the sameness of it! She could see Lilli, fiery red and bright-eyed as she looks to Elaina, her heart shining ten time brighter than her own, and she can see grumbling Alvaro and the smiles she would break from him. Marcelo and the trauma his father’s death caused him, Ori and the playful smile she always gave Elaina. They stand next to her like true figures, but she had quickly drawn their images back into herself and with a final sign, she had moved towards this new life, dropping off pieces of her old ones, like candy in the woods. Just in case she needed to find her way back home. Their names have grown and changed, even if they still sounded the same. From shy introductions upon first meetings, to playful games through the field of lavender. From midnight sleepovers when they thought Aletta or Lovelace would not hear them whispering late in the night to heartfelt conversations about homesickness and a heart’s desire. And now, it is spoken in such relief, as if she had been holding her breath with the name on her tongue since setting foot in Beqanna and it is finally expelled from her lungs. She can breathe. Her laugh is beautiful, the same as it has always been, even if their lives have gone on paths that may produce less and less laughter as time continues to drag onwards. “I would like to think myself a mythical spirit, neither dead nor alive. Here to guide you on your way, oh Lilli, the red haired, loveliest of ye ole legacy clan,” she says, her voice growing deep and ominous, always willing to see set the mood. Though it hardly holds before her own laughter tumbles forth. She would always find Lilli. Her chestnut cousin should know this, should remember this from all those days of hide and seek in the deep valley of Paraiso. When Elaina would find her with quickness and ease, able to locate her in the strangest of place. Elaina will always find you, Lilli, you never have to worry or fear. Here, with her cousin’s face just a mere inches away from her own, here Elaina feels strong, she feels like she can do this, accomplish anything because she has Lilli beside her. Lilli has always been the thing to make Elaina brave, and fearless, it was knowing Elaina was in Beyond, waiting to see if she would come back from Windskeep that Elaina was able to stand at the edge of her parents’ graves and not weep, but feel a sense of peace. When she returned to find no Lilliana waiting for her, she knew she had to leave, to find her courage, packaged in red, with eyes like a summer’s sky. But what is the blue sky without the bright amber sun to make it glow and shine? These girls, they needed each other. “Parts of it, it reminds me of Windskeep, silly enough,” she says, because Elaina doesn't know why she looks for her brith home in every direction she turns. She dismisses it with an almost cold hand, as if trying to forget that part of herself. As if she can. Not while Lilli sits her smiling at her in all her beauty, and Elaina finds she wouldn't want to forget it all, not if it would mean forgetting her chestnut butterfly. “Dont be sorry,” her response to reflex, she would never expect Lilli to apologize to her. They never wished or intended harm on either, not in their entire lives, and Elaina knows Lilli would do nothing to hurt her. Not even leaving. After all, Elaina had left first. “Valerio,” she says then. “Has he not come back?” She asks, amber eyes peering into Lilli’s own, asking about the father that Elaina thought, at time, that she knew better than the chestnut girl. Valerio had been her godfather, a valiant war hero, but to Lilli, he was a father. It was a carefully precise balancing act, and sometimes, the golden girl thinks, maybe, Valerio had drifted too far to one side, at the cost of his daughter. And she doesn't care speak his name, hoping she would cause no further ache to her best friend. Her squeal is met eagerly by Elaina’s own, laughing and talking like distance and time have never separated them. In some way though, had it every really and truly? “Yes, a little girl! She is so feisty Lilli, she would give Liam a run for his money,” she says now. Talk turns to Aesop, a weakness for Elaina, her immortal grandmother, full of wisdom and beauty. She had been the hardest to leave that day. “I think it hurts, sometimes, to see me,” she says, uncertain. “And to know her own daughter is buried in the ground,” she finishes. It is such a rarity for Elaina to speak of her parents. It echoes for just a moment. She offers a light hearted laugh in response to Lilli’s words. “You’ve been busy it would seem,” she says. A true social butterfly, just like the nicknames they had for each other so long ago. “It sounds nice, and with you there, I am sure it will be a pleasant place to live. What made you decide to go there?” She questions. When Lilli mets her side, Elaina closes bright eyes of fire for a moment, content with the nearness and warmth that only her best friend can provide. When she opens them, she seems to miraculously follow blue eyes up the stars. It is an achingly familiar tradition, one she had shared with her parents from the time she could toddle on long, spidery legs. She wants to cry, but Lilli saves her, bringing Elaina laughter and joy instead. “I have met a few, but I don't think I should get tangled into any—affairs. I think I want to focus on this, on becoming a politician. Do you think that’s silly?” She asks, because of everyone’s opinions, their thoughts, their advice. Oh, it is Lilli’s that soars above them all. Elaina knows that her crimson cousin could guide her where she is needed. benjamin and beylani's sunflower-girl |
@[lilliana]