[private] i choose you and me religiously, assailant

[Adriana]

i showed him all my teeth & then i laughed out loud,
because i never wanted saving, i just wanted to be found

Beqanna was being fickle again.

Adriana knew how much Assailant had given—how fiercely he had tried to restore Tephra, for her. But the land had always moved to its own rhythm, bending to no will but its own. Though the volcanic kingdom remained lost, she did not see his efforts as a failure.  She trusted that his efforts had not been made in vain, that there is a larger picture that they are not seeing. It will all come together eventually, and seeing as how it has been gone for so long already, she does not mind waiting.

The waiting is made easier now that she is not alone, too.

Once she had finally given up on resisting wanting to be with him, everything else had fallen into place. They had each other, and the twins — though Atreus and Alicent were now nearly grown, which was a bittersweet thing. They were such a perfect melding of their parents that looking at them filled her chest with an aching kind of pride, eager to see what they grew up to become while also wishing she could have kept them young and innocent forever. Raising them had been far more fulfilling than she could have ever anticipated, and those years when they relied on her most she did not have time to miss or worry about Tephra.

Now, with summer having faded into fall, her birthland is still only a whisper in the back of her mind. She stands knee-deep in the river that winds at the edge of the forest, the treeline at her back. Her own golden and crimson-dappled body is a visual harmony to the turning leaves behind her, and the still-warm sun glints brightly against the water wings that stream at her sides. She isn’t sure where Lant had gone off to; she did her best to not let the insecure envy that still sat in a knot at the bottom of her chest to come loose, letting him go and do as he pleases without questioning him. He had never given her a reason to doubt him — not ever since they had both shown their hand and let go of their games.

And yet she could not deny that she was counting down the minutes until he returned, forcing herself to stare at the drifting current and the water that swirled at her golden legs as a distraction from where her mind tried to run back to when he was gone.

A D R I A N A

@assailant

[assailant]

Assailant

The autumn breeze lashes its sharp, chilled fingers at his side, just unpleasant enough to make him want to cut his flight short. And yet, he presses on, not willing to admit defeat. Not again.

He knows that he should bask in the simple beauty of his life, and he does. Oh, how he does. As a youngster, he never imagined things would turn out this way and, if he’s completely honest, he had never really wanted this life. To no surprise, of course, since the prevailing lifestyle of his upbringing was driven by hormones and unfettered by silly things like morals. He supposed he’d been ‘successful’, but perhaps deep within, he’d known that something wasn’t quite right about the parade of faceless women and nameless children. But he couldn’t see beyond it, so he blundered aimlessly through the motions until he couldn’t anymore.

He doesn’t remember much about those long years of imprisonment, but he knows he never thought about trying something new. And yet, once released from the bowels of the earth, fate had set him on a course that led to all of the things he’d once laughed at.. a deep, shared love with a woman who kept him on his toes. Though they’d had their share of trials, it worked out in the end and now he delights in the family they’d created. Even now, pride warms him as he thinks of their children—exceptionally bright and growing beautifully, or so his parental blinders insist. He never thought he could be so intensely invested in the futures of well… anyone, yet here he is. Though he is grateful for the changes and devoted to keeping on this path, bits of his old pessimism manage to bleed through as quickly as ink on wet paper.

So it’s no surprise to him that as quickly as it comes, the warmth leaches away as his thoughts switch to their home, or lack thereof. Of course, he’d grown to enjoy the meadow, and both the forest and the seashore are sentimental, but he can’t shake the disappointment that lurks just beneath the surface. Casimira had suggested he assume leadership of Tephra, but that was never the point. Despite his changed perspective, he still does not believe he is the right kind of man for that. No, he simply wanted somewhere they could call their own, a safe place where they could give their children the kind of upbringing he’d not had. And yes, there is the blow his ego had taken as well. He does recognize that his feelings are not unlike a child’s irrational pouting, for Adriana had not given any indication that she thought any less of him for the fruitless endeavour. But still…

He sighs heavily into the wind, knowing he should return, as he’s been away for longer than intended. He descends slowly, scanning the shore for his family; when he does not see them, he turns north, wondering if he should bypass the forest, as they don’t spend as much time there as the meadow. He does begin to venture that way, but something tugs at him, directing him away from the meadow. He touches down near the river, knowing he can at least follow it back to the meadow if he does not find them here. But he does not have to look far, at least not today.

The corners of his mouth turn up slightly as he simply watches her for a few moments, still dazzled by the ethereal pictures she creates even when just standing as she is. He feels like a walking cliché sometimes, but he acknowledges how lucky he is to be where he is at. It’s almost enough to push aside the negativity, but it lingers anyway as tension in his face. But he arranges his expression carefully as he wades into the water, not wanting to start off by burdening her with his troubles. He reaches her in just a few short strides, pausing to gently press his lips to her shoulder. “You know, I do love meeting a pretty lady in the water…” He then trails his way up her neck, admiring the path his warm breath leaves in her frosted scales. When he comes to rest at her side, he lets his head lean against hers and a low rumble of affection rises from his chest. “Penny for your thoughts?”

All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveler is unaware

--Martin Buber

image by HalwestIV

@Adriana