[private] could not hold me back

[Mazikeen]

On the flight to Taiga, just moments from where her journey had begun, Mazikeen pauses only once - to snatch up a deer and feast on every last scrap of it that she can fit inside of her stomach. Her frustration and anger fuels the rest of her - keeps her exhaustion at bay. Such lengths to go to for a daughter she does not truly care for - but Sickle belongs to her and no one else. The iridescent filly should be in Hyaline with her brother and cousin, and the second daughter growing within Mazikeen even now. She will either find what she seeks in the redwoods or she will go back and peel strips of flesh off of Aela until she is given the truth. As an eagle-sized phoenix, Mazikeen swerves through the redwoods when she arrives - diving right into them without even a flicker of hesitation at the border. Her mind is a solid scream of fire, nothing breaching the flames except her quest to find her daughter. Every moment that passes without seeing Sickle, Mazikeen can feel her headache growing. Her fire-aura burns around her until she is bright as the sun that never quite reaches some of the parts of the forest she visits. The bark of the redwoods is too thick to catch fire easily as she darts around, but she leaves a few sooty scorch marks in her wake, a trail to follow for anyone looking. When the frustration becomes too much, Mazikeen releases a terrible roar and lands on the needle-covered ground with a heavy thud. She is the blood-red griffin again, her fire aura receding but the glowing markings cracking across her entire body - matching those that bloom along her curved horns. Between the trees she moves slowly, her glowing form casting shadows all around her. She begins her hunt anew - no longer just looking for Sickle but for anyone in this wretched forest. m a z i k e e n .

 

@Nashua

[Nashua]

Mazikeen is not the first shapeshifter to grace the Forest of Giants.

Nashua assumes that there have been many over the years, but the prevalence at keeping other shifters out stems from the memory of only one. He doesn't think about that day often; he tries not to. Summer had come to Taiga, and the forest was warm. After a harsh and bitter winter, with the clouds and the Sequoia canopy covering so much, the summer sun had been bright and inviting. Wolfbane had stepped from seemingly nowhere, an omen of suffering to everyone except it seemed Nashua.

He does his best to not think about his father, but given that the Curse has re-emerged in his brother Gale, it means that his father is often in his thoughts these days.

It brings back other memories as well. Growing up in Taiga (and perhaps it hadn't been as obvious for Yanhua, with their mother's coloring and her blue eyes), it hadn't been easy for the son of the man who had helped usurp one ruler and then tried bind this forest to Loess. (History was ironic in the way that would attempt to repeat itself; as much as Nashua considers the memories of his deceased sire, he thinks of what Cheri is proposing by uniting the North and South. It doesn't sound much different than what the former Comtesse and her Commandant had attempted, only this time it was an entire kingdom instead of a single territory.) The Northerners had a long memory, and though Cheri was the daughter of one of their Guardians, he wondered if some would recall the last attempt to colonize them.

If they still remembered the Cursed shifter that roamed these woods.

The guttural cry stirs the Freyr from his thoughts. Noel would be nearby, and though most of their children had fledged, the striped pegasus had remained nearby since the theft of their youngest, Bolder. Cloaking himself immediately, the invisible stallion moved towards the source of the sound. He's driven on by other thoughts: perhaps this might be a clue what happened to Yanhua.

When he comes close enough - slipping beneath the Taiga brush while his hooves crunch lightly beneath him - Nashua sees the spiraling horns and the burning eyes of a gryffen. He stops, allowing the shield of invisibility to fall away from him. First, he is a floating head until it recedes to reveal the rest of the copper stallion and all his seething rage.

"You are no more welcome here than Gale is."

@Mazikeen

[Mazikeen]

His anger thrills her and she turns to face him, her lion’s tail flicking behind her. She does not respond to the words he greets her with - they hold no interest to her. Mazikeen continues to burn inside, the flames curling in every inch of her, but externally she is calm now. Cold. Her attention is latched onto Nashua in the same manner she used when she had hunted that deer before she came here. She’s always been a hunter, always found a thrill in the chase and the fight - and this last year has freed her of her conscience that kept it as mere exercise. Now it is a game. Now she can see just how far she can push Nashua before he attacks or flees. Either would be a delight. She can use his blood to feed her anger, to drown out that spot of golden light that burns in the back of her mind where she cannot reach to tear it out. “Where’s my daughter? I was told she was brought here.” Her head tilts to the side, her gaze predatory as it narrows. “Did you forget I was pregnant, Nashua? I didn’t tell you when you came with Bolder that day but I know Gale did.” There had been so few secrets between them and fewer now. The mind of the Curse was something she could peek in any time she wished. What a weapon that might have been once, when she had cared enough to make promises. It is an effort not to keep her dark gaze darting around, but if anyone knew where Sickle was in this forest - it was Nashua. All that remained was how to get the information out of him. “If you’re curious - he wasn’t possessed by the curse yet when we conceived them. But he was when they were born.” The one brewing inside of her was all curse, all darkness, but she won’t reveal that she is pregnant just yet. She doesn’t want Nashua pulling his punches and he seems like the weak-hearted sort to do that when a child is involved. She steps closer, the talons of this form digging into the needles illuminated by her glowing skin and feathers, and her voice is taunting as she thinks about that day in Icicle Isle - the new bonds she had once been so happy about. “Thanks for checking in on me.” m a z i k e e n .

 

@Nashua

[Nashua]

Nashua stands guarded, unwilling to move from the ground he stands on.

He wouldn't give in to the flame of fury that burns within him. For a moment, the winged stallion imagines Noel and her dark eyes. Trust me, she had said, and at this moment, Nash tries not to give in to the bloodlust that demands compensation for the theft of his son. His green eyes settle on the predatory creature before him, as Nashua continues to stifle his fury.

Daughter?

"Why would I have your daughter, Mazikeen?" Nashua growls, while he angles a now bare shoulder away from her. "I don't take children from their parents." He spits back, leveling his attention back to the shapeshifter. For a moment, Nashua thinks he might be able to be stronger than his anger.

That he might be able to leave Mazikeen with no more than a few terse words.

What Mazikeen reveals next is as strong as any physical blow (and his copper sides heave at her words). That her children weren't conceived when Gale was Cursed, and the memory of his brindled brother aches where Nash had tried to keep out the old hurts, where the bonds of family had once existed. He had been uncertain about being a father then - and Nash had thought it was the usual nerves of an expectant father, coupled with the memory of the one they shared. (But that hadn't been right, either. What Nashua recalls of the monster that roamed these woods had been very different from the stories that Gale and Pteron had told him of the man who had once ruled Loess.) 

But she unearths more, too.
Because Nashua had always wondered if the darkness in him had been something inherited. He'd struggled with it over the years, and had always attempted to be bigger than the anger and fury that he kept tucked beneath his breast. The striped pegasus had started to move away - hadn't even been willing to take this further with Mazikeen than an argument - but she speaks again and the Freyr turns sharply with eyes full of a grief and anger that he has been fighting for years.

One started with the loss of his sister, Celina, and then continued by Gale and then Yanhua, finished only by the loss of Bolder. 

There has been nowhere for Nashua to mourn, and there has been nowhere for Nashua to get angry.

"If you had come to us for help, we would have." He snaps back. "If you had given us any kind of sign, we would have helped you."

[Mazikeen]

Nashua’s growl doesn’t deter Mazikeen’s belief that Sickle is here - and she both grins and burns a little brighter in response to his words. Yes, she had taken Bolder - but it had been his son’s decision to stay. And she watches with further delight to see the way her words land, the heaving of his sides and the grief and anger in his eyes. Mazikeen wants him to hurt and she knows there are so many ways to make that happen, bloody and not. All of the options will keep the wildfire raging inside of her and maybe that will help it burn out the golden gift she had been given that is still an itch in the back of her mind. His snapped reply stokes her own anger and it is so easy to spit a response right back, her dark beak biting at the air with the words. “I was a little fucking preoccupied, sorry I didn’t stop to hand out invitations to my own flaying.” Mazikeen’s plan to keep Gale’s attention focused on her and only her had worked well. That had been the whole point. She had not wanted Nashua to come and find them - but that did not change the fact that he did not try. Not a single one of Gale’s brothers, who had been so happy to hear he’d be living close, had crossed into Hyaline until that night when Nashua and Noel had shown up to get their son. A whole family riddled with cowards and it only took the purging of her entire self to be able to see that clearly. She’s about to ask about Sickle again, point out that she knew very well he hadn’t taken her but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t keeping her, when her eyes drift and she realizes Nashua is standing there without wings. Mazikeen falls still and her voice is very quiet when she asks him “Where are your wings?” and despite the volume, there is no mistaking the shake of anger on that last word. Because if he could change his body like Bolder had been able to do, if he could shift after all of his bullshit, she was going to tear him and then this whole forest apart and find her daughter that way. m a z i k e e n .

 

@Nashua

[Nashua]

Nashua has always been a storm.

And perhaps he was always meant to be, when one side of his family had been able to summon winter gales and summer squalls. Over the years, Nash had tried to emulate his twin and his mother in their ability to conceal their emotions. Both of them had been able to stay unfailingly kind in the face of anger and hatred.

He doesn't doubt that they could have met the devil (and they had, hadn't they?), and still would have searched them for a sliver of salvation.

But he is angry. He has been angry for such a long time - at the way his mother had been taken and then the abandonment of his father (another inflicting kindness that had left a deep wound), the death of his sister, the way that most of his siblings seemed to succumb to one sadness or another. The loss of Yanhua had been a deep blow; it had been his twin that had helped Nashua practice caution, to prevent him from blowing too strongly one way or another. Now that brother is gone, his son has been taken, and the Curse roams again the shape of his sibling, Gale.

This is the kind of thing that Curse would want, he thinks. To inflict so much suffering that they are blinded by anger, looking everywhere other than where they should.

There had been burdens on his own - the death of his mother, Yanhua's madness, rearing three children alongside Noel, and the responsibilities of a kingdom - but Mazikeen is right. He should have tried harder. They should have come to Hyaline sooner. The added weight of that realization nearly staggers him; Nash had always tried so hard to be perfect where it pertained to his family and he has failed them.

Her orange eyes linger on his shoulders - and Nashua not realizing that his emotions have physically shaped him - glares back at her. There is fury blazing in her gaze, shaking her voice and the speckled wings that should have been on his shoulders remain hidden, like so many other secrets in this forest.

"Get the hell out."

[Mazikeen]

Nashua’s reaction to her words isn’t nearly as satisfying as Mazikeen would like, her eyes flashing as they remain fixed on him and irritation blooms. She’s getting distracted from her mission here, but if she’s to be distracted it might as well be interesting. All she can hope for is that these blows are landing and will fester in the stallion’s mind but unlike with Gale, she has no ability to check to see if that’s the case. He ignores her question and she ignores him in turn. Her gaze narrows but shifts away from his empty shoulders and back to the forest around them. She still feels that anger radiating through her, feeding her energy and allowing her to forget she’s gone a few days without any sleep now and will crash soon. Especially if she keeps fighting, keeps shifting. But she’s not thinking about that yet. “A golden bird told me my daughter had been brought here.” Now when she looks back to Nashua, there is a hollow grin - empty of all the emotions that should be shining there and that lion’s tail flicks behind her again as she moves sideways, like she’s going to slip further into the trees. Her fire aura flashes around her, and a few of the drier needles by her feet sizzle at the touch of the flames. There are only shadows in her expression as she gestures for him to come with her. “Let’s check, shall we?” Like they’re going to take a stroll through the woods just like she had once done with Yanhua. Except this time she wonders if she can conjure enough flame to burn each patch of forest they pass through so there is no doubt of anyone hiding within. m a z i k e e n .

 

[Nashua]

He had started to turn away (though careful to not completely turn his back on her), thinking that their conversation was finished. Her daughter was not here - Mazikeen was as much banished as her Cursed mate was - and he wouldn't fight her. No, he had decided as his green eyes had blazed at her, he wouldn't succumb to more senseless violence in this world.

Nashua refused to become a part of it.

A golden bird told me my daughter was brought here.

Scowling, the striped pegasus jerked his head around. It didn't take him long at all - he knew almost instantaneously - who she met. And the thought of Aela being at the heart of this makes him sick. "Did this golden bird have anything to gain by sending you here?" Nashua snarls back. He swings around and at least his wings break free of their invisible cloak. The chestnut stallion partially flares them, blocking Mazikeen from taking another step.

"Did you know I banished Aela?" Nashua says, low and taunting. "Just like you and Gale." His scheming sister had sent somebody else to do her dirty work, his sneer says.

Closing his wings, the Freyr turns invisible again, letting the color of this world leave him. He waits a moment before stepping away, knowing that Mazikeen would the cracking twigs and snapping of dead leaves beneath his hooves. How long he can remain hidden from Maze? All it would take was a different set of eyes, and the shapeshifter would be able to see him. He had thought to drive her into a frenzy, and then lead her out of Taiga. Have them both drift somewhere towards the River, or perhaps south towards Tephra where he could vanish in the thick jungle vegetation.

But it all depended on what Mazikeen would shift into.

And wasn't that all the source of the madness that has afflicted his family?

"Mazikeen," Nashua tries reasoning with her. "Listen to me." He says, his voice coming fainter. He had failed her before, but there might be a chance to help her now. "We can get your daughter back. We can work together. Try to find a cure for Gale." They could find a way to purge from this bloodline once and for all. Nash continues to speak while lingering unseen by mortal eyes and adds, "For you and Bolder."

@Mazikeen

[Mazikeen]

It wouldn’t surprise Mazikeen one bit that Aela had something to gain from sending her here - but it had made too much sense so of course she had to investigate. She’d spent so long being idle that it was good to have something to hunt, even if it was her own flesh and blood. But there was only so much patience left in her and if these cursed siblings wouldn’t stop jerking her around she’d be happy to end her hunt in other ways. “You’d know more about that than I would.” She tosses back, regarding the golden bird. It would seem that being banished from the North was quite the thing to do. Who else was on that list? Mazikeen might want to befriend them, if she hadn’t already. The griffin hisses in annoyance when Nashua turns invisible again, her eyes tracking him as best as she can following the movement of twigs and needles beneath his hooves. It’s instinct to want to track him, even though that distracts her from her purpose. If he runs, she’ll have free range of the forest and can continue her search. Unfortunately, he does not leave her alone just yest. His reasonable, faint voice grates on Mazikeen’s ears and she bristles at his words. Work together? When he despises what she is? It stinks like a trap. Mazikeen had been willing to trust Aela because going to Taiga had made sense but there is nothing left in her to encourage her to trust Nashua now. She just wants Sickle back, wants that thing that is hers. Her annoyance quickly flares back into anger at the mention of a cure. “Your son doesn’t need to be cured, Nashua. And neither do I.” The words are a snarl and Mazikeen becomes a blood-red dragon, just about the size she is as a horse. The density of the forest and the limitations of her energy keep her from growing any larger but there is still plenty of damage to be done like this. Her draconic pupils narrow into slits as she sees Nashua’s heat signature and on the next exhale she breathes fire in his direction. “Where is my daughter?!” Mazikeen bellows once the small burst of flame stops, the words rumbling through her body. m a z i k e e n .

 

[Nashua]

He doesn't have much time. Nashua knows that. His invisibility will only buy him a few moments, or perhaps less. Maybe Mazikeen had a higher power than he anticipated, maybe she had heightened senses that could detect exactly where his furious heart was beating. Maybe her hearing had been altered so that she heard each break of the silver-green needles beneath his hooves, no matter quiet tried to be or how well he knew this ground.

They go on about the subject of his sister, and if Aela had aligned herself with Mazikeen or Gale, the Redwoods were in more trouble than he thought. It was no secret that she hated this place, but if she had somehow gotten their half-brother and his mate to share in it, Taiga was in more danger than any horse realized.

(And he thinks of his children, of Noel. Of Illuminae. Of Reynard and Saturnelle. Of the Shadow Clan, and all the others that call this forest home.)

Nash's time runs out as Mazikeen shifts into a dragon, and her flames scorch the edge of one of his beautiful wings. He flares into existence with sparks and an explosion of light. The feathers catch fire and the smell of burning skin fills the air as his healing tries to hastily knit the burn away. The Freyr swears - a muffled sound that is drowned out by the sound of the draconic snarl - and Nashua continues to attempt to make Mazikeen understand.

Perhaps there was still a chance to reach her.

"No?" he snarls back at her, and thinks of Illuminae, of the way that he had told her that both his brother and father had gone mad with their shifting. Perhaps it was the Curse, but it makes Nashua if it draws out the dark shadows in others as well. "What about the blood, Mazikeen?" Nashua asks her, wishing he had the familial ability to press memories into her mind like Yanhua or their mother. It plays in his troubled mind so often: Bolder as a wolf with blood dripping from his mouth.

An accident, she had told him in Hyaline.

Perhaps it had started this way with her, an accident or some mishap, something that Gale had managed to twist and warp within her until she no longer understood what direction she was heading in. It wouldn't be the first time that the Curse had done it, and the striped pegasus keeps trying to reach some sense in her as he begins to back away from her, thinking that he might still be able to lead them both out of Taiga.

Nash holds the badly burnt wing against his broad side, flaring the other wide when he stops and addresses her truthfully through gritted teeth: "Not here."

@Mazikeen