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    COTY

    Assailant -- Year 226

    QOTY

    "But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura


    [private]  I just need a change again [Oceane]
    #3

    Help me out before I drown
    Save me now before I give up


    It had been a strange feeling, shifting into his bear before her to cross the sea. After hiding it for so long, he hasn’t quite gotten over the shame of what he was even though he had finally made peace with it. He hadn’t been the most graceful swimmer either, his bear was clumsy in the churning waters after years of being unused. He’s quite thankful for her wings that keep her high in the sky and unable to watch his awkward ursine paws drag through the currents. Making sure to shift back into himself the moment he touches the shore again.

    Oceane takes his silence in stride, filling it instead with updated politics of her kingdom. Names he doesn’t recognize occupy her ranks, her alliances, her enemies. As she talks, warm and amiably, that weird sensation caresses the cold glass of his heart. It’s a feeling that seems to glide across the crystal as if searching for a way to penetrate it, as if it might worm through the crack that was left at Ellyse’s betrayal. The thought of her instantly chases away whatever he had been feeling, replacing it with the old heat of flared anger and pain that burns with familiarity beneath the ragged X on his chest. His gaze darkens momentarily then forces her out of his head and focuses back on the opaline mare as she laughs and guides him through the canyons.

    The Eclipse had not effected him as badly as it had others. He had always been hunted by monsters, they wore many faces, and with the help of the bear he was able to get through physically unscathed and no more emotionally affected than he already was. The trauma from his past was scarier than anything with gnashing teeth and claws. However he catches the sudden scent of sweat that breaks on her skin as the night grows cooler and his gaze narrows as her voice tightens despite seeming just as calm and collected as she always was. He looks around their surroundings again and for a moment he questions, as the sun fades behind the sandy crest of the canyon, if she was afraid of the dark. He thinks of the long nights spent awake avoiding sleep and wonders if perhaps they had something in common after all.

    Pale strands of moonlight soon take the place of the fallen sun, illuminating the world she describes to him as they come to a halt in the cove. The gentle lap of the surf brings him back to the black sands of Tephra and he cannot stop the reactive snap of his tail against the soft glowing brand on his haunch as his anxiety begins to push heavily against his stomach like a weighted stone. Despite the haunted memory that frays at the edge of his mind, he can appreciate the beauty of this place. It was calm, secluded, and exactly what he needed. He should be safe here and in return others would be safe from his absence.

    And still…. Still he’s hesitant. Not because he doesn’t want to be here but there’s a part of him that’s tired of hiding. Tired of pretending that he doesn’t exist. That whisper of hope floats through him, that maybe this was the first step in learning how to control all that anger, shame, and pain. Maybe he was worthy of redemption after all. His own self loathing is quick to return but the thought lingers longer than it usually does.

    He’s been awfully quiet as he takes it all in. Not looking at her as he drinks in the actual possibilities of this place. When he finally does, there’s a softness to the hard ragged lines of his ravaged face and a warmth flickering in the gold flecks of his eye. He had never tried to eat or hunt as the bear, had always been too ashamed and disgusted with his ability. However the way Oceane addresses it as if it was normal makes him feel a little less self-conscious, maybe he would try it. Just to see. “I’ll do my best to not eat your friends.” He says solemnly although there’s a small smile curling at the end of his mouth. “What did the fish do to escape your protection?”

    There’s another small pause as he looks back to where the tide flows back into the Oceane and his voice is low and husky as he finally speaks again, the empty socket turned to her. “I still don’t know why you’ve gone through the trouble… But I am grateful Oceane. I suppose I'm in your debt.” She does not come off as a ruthless ruler but she is a ruler regardless. Although she had been nothing but kind to him, it wouldn't be the first time a kingdom had tried to manipulate his bear in their favor. He hopes she will not ask him of this, hopes he hasn't misjudged her kindness for cunniningness. Pushing past those concerns, he focuses on a different one. Hesitating, keeping the good eye to the distance as he asks quietly, “Will you tell the others about me?”


    Ledger



    @[Oceane]


    Messages In This Thread
    I just need a change again [Oceane] - by Ledger - 04-27-2021, 09:37 PM
    RE: I just need a change again [Oceane] - by Ledger - 04-29-2021, 07:58 PM



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