[open] to a memory i don't mess with, ori

[lilliana]

She is grateful for the hours it takes to travel from the Common Lands to Taiga.

What was normally a quiet, contemplative journey for the flame-marked mare was filled with laughter instead. Each step the pair took towards the forest in the North, well, each sweeping stride grew lighter as Ori and Lilliana trekked towards the Taiga. Despite the darkness that had spread across Beqanna, the shades of her childhood glimmer against the shadows. Red and gold, colors that she has known and trusted since her earliest days (and thus some reasons why she had adored Ruthless and trusted Wolfbane and saved Craft).

There is so much to talk about. So many questions that she wants to ask (and Lilli stops herself from saying them all at once, hearing the gentle tenor of a laughing Malachi in her memories: 'The words won't all flutter away, Lillibird. It's okay to take your time.') The smile on her dark lips softens and the chestnut tucks her slender head down, holding on to the memory of her beloved brother. She had time, she reminded herself.

There was time, she soothed herself.

But this happiness she feels, this moment she shares with Ori, Lilliana means to bask in this warm glow as long as they can share it.

"Your mother was the only reason Mama had any peace," the copper mare says softly. "Aletta had been searching for him, all this time." Lilli adds, remembering those days after the fog had come to Paraiso and the valley had vanished with it. "When she found me here, she said the only thing that eased their separation was knowing Ruth was with him." Her head lifts a little as they continue and her expression softens, "She believed that since they got through Windskeep together, she knew that they'd be alright."

Ori continues to speak and for a moment, they could have been back in Beyond. Lilliana's laughter is bright and airy and full of life; she loves this.  Her cousin reveals that Alvaro has not one but two children and she laughs again, turning her sculpted head conspiratorially towards the champagne. "Do you remember Brynn's son, Roland?" she asks with a matching grin. "He and Brielle share a daughter," explains Lilliana. Her head tosses, shaking the notion playfully in her mind. Temperamental and head-strong Bri, grown-up just like the rest of them. "Elena told me about them some time ago," she says. A shadow falls across her face as she remembers their last night in Taiga, "She was here for a while."

It had been for the best that she had gone, though. (This is something Lilliana tells herself often. She was glad that Elena never saw her... after. How hollow she became after Pangea.) 

Shaking her refined head again, "Word is she found a land ablaze with sunflowers." Her smile returns, imagining their palomino cousin surrounded by them. It's one of the ways she perseveres, how she has at least kept parts of herself intact. If she can know that Elena is out there somewhere, that she is alright, some part of Lilliana thinks she can be alright, too.

There is still so much to say and to learn. Alvaro is Guardian of Paraiso? Lilliana is stunned for a moment, because something in her can only imagine that ever being her father. But life is not stagnant. It is always changing and those changes had even found their way into the ancestral valley. "He'll make a wonderful Guardian," she says and finds her heart wishing that wherever the ebony stallion is, that he is happy and well. "Oh!" she exclaims, still finding more to share. "Jay found a cove," Lilliana says before she looks up to the pitch-black above them. "Mama had brought news of him and said he found a place where the stars always shining."

The Guardian slows her steps and searches the sky, like some part of her hoped that a star might actually appear.

"She said that he can hear them," she tells her cousin before her eyes fill with a quiet sort of wonder. "And when the stars are silent, there are creatures in the ocean that he can hear singing."

It's so much easier, she realizes, to tell these stories than her own. It is so much easier to speak of Brielle and Jay and Elena and her parents - about home - than herself. But Lilliana has never shied away from anything before and she doesn't start now with somebody who has known her as a wind-spirited filly from Murmuring Rivers. It doesn't have to be her entire story but something on her face grows bashful (and had the light returned to Beqanna, her cousin might have sensed the blush heating her cheeks), "I have children of my own." She says shyly, "and my eldest two have families of their own."

For once, she is grateful for the immortality that Beqanna had given her. Even if she looks barely older than the last time Ori saw her, enough years have passed in Beqanna to tell this story. "And they are," she stops, finding that there is only the truth: "perfect." There is more to say and when Lilliana elaborates, she shows her golden cousin. There are a few waves of memories, a gentle lap at the edge of her mind with the invitation of more if the champagne wished it. There are images of the first twins frolicking through Taiga - Yanhua tossing his growing horns, Nashua flaring his fledgling wings. Images of the second set among a bed of Snow Drops - Roselin's dark face reaching tenderly for one while Oren's glittering blaze catches in the sunlight. And then there is her youngest, white-and-red Reave with bold daring in his youthful gaze.

As they come closer to the border of Taiga, however, Lilliana can't let the towering Sequoias remain in the shadows. She looks to her cousin to share another memory, one that is precious to the Guardian. It is her first, with her vision glancing up and the sunlight trickling hazily in gilded hues through the branches above. The smaller mare slows and tilts her head towards her cousin. "This gift," she offers, "it isn't so different from your mother's." Lilliana says, "I can see glimpses of the past." (And part of her is tempted to ask, did it ever bother Ruth? To see the things that had already happened and have no power to change any of it?)

"Tell me something of you, @[Ori]." She finally says when they resume their trek to the Northern forest. "Where have the winds been blowing you?"

so wow this a novel marma. 

if somebody wants to say hello from the taiga crew, come on down! just let ori reply first <33

[Ori]

Laughter filled the air as the pair of flame and sunshine began the trek to Taiga, a stark contrast to the darkness that filled the world around them. In that moment, Ori was home, and she could only hope Lilli felt the same. Lilli’s tone, expression, and everything about her seemed to become free again as they continued talking. Bits and pieces of lightness and airiness seemed to poke out from under the pain, and Ori was glad that she could find them. It was like a little game to see which stories of family or bit of laughter she could get from her cousin next.

Their conversation continued, and @[lilliana], her voice soft as a breeze, brought up one of the most beloved figures in Ori’s life. “Your mother was the only reason mama ever had any peace.”

“Really?” The champagne girl’s eyes widened slightly as she tilted her head. Her mother had never really been one to talk much of herself, and while she knew that she had a vast respect for Aletta, and Aletta for her, she had never quite heard the degree that the trust ran from the grey mare to her mother.

“Aletta had been searching for him, all this time.” The image of the refined ashen mare sprung to her mind, of her searching for the one she held so dear to her land after land. It must have hurt, somewhere in her heart. To not know where the ones you hold dearest are, or if they’re even alive. At that thought, it occurred to Ori why she could imagine that ache so well. It was hers, once, even if she rarely spoke of it. Back when many of Paraiso’s adults and her sisters had been at Windskeep, no one had known if they were going to come back. No one knew if they should try to accept they were gone and move onward, or patiently await their return.

The scariest thing that whole time was how easily some pieces of her had accepted that mom, Aliyah, Lissa, or countless others who left might become just like dad as their absence grew longer without news. Even as the days stretched onward with nothing known of loved ones, even with the knowledge that hung over everyone’s heads of what might have happened to them, Ori would always wait for them. No matter what, there would be a place for them in Ori’s heart.

The ones who really hadn’t returned still had their places there, even if moving forward meant they were pushed somewhat to the back, there was always time to revisit those places and remember what their occupants had been like before taking some more distance again.

Lilli’s soft voice washed over Ori’s contemplation as she continued, “When she found me here, she said the only thing that eased their separation was knowing Ruth was with him.” Ori nodded as the smile on her face softened. She truly adored her mother, and even thinking of her now gave the girl the softest feelings of warmth and love for the winged woman.

“She believed that since they got through Windskeep together, they’d be alright.” Lilliana concluded.

“Yeah… mom’s dependable like that,” Ori began, her voice somewhat reserved, but still happy. Like an adult recounting their favorite childhood fairytale. “Though, you know she’d never believe it. It’s a bad habit of hers.” She recounted, laughing a little. It was always so silly to her, the way her mother had difficulty accepting compliments or praise at times. She was a superhero, as far as Ori was concerned. She may have had her shortcomings, but she always did her best to be there for her children, and it was one of the many things Ori loved about the blood gold peg.

“But I’m sure she’d be glad to hear it, all the same.” Ori brightened as she put more bounce in her stride. If nothing else, her mother would accept compliments with grace, even if she herself didn’t necessarily believe them, and that was enough for her daughter.

She was delighted when her news of Alvaro results in that lovely, airy laughter from her cousin once more, and she easily joined in as her cousin adopted an equally-mischievous tone as they continued. “Do you remember Brynn’s son, Roland?” Ori nodded and leaned in slightly closer to her cousin as her grin stretched to match her cousin’s.

“He and Brielle share a daughter.” She explained, and the playful smirk on Ori’s face stretched to a genuine smile. “That’s great! Wow… just… wow…” Her odd-eyes glimmered at the thought. Even though Brielle had always been headstrong, a leader-type in the group that she would often follow into mischief, she was a mom now. Just like Marcelo was a father. Wow… everyone else was really grown up already, weren’t they? Proper adults who were ready to take care of foals of their own. That was fine with Ori, though. So long as they were happy, she was happy for them. As amazing as it was, she figured it just wasn’t the path she wanted to take right now. There was more than one way to live, and she was trying to figure out her way for herself right now, and that was alright.

“Elena told me about them some time ago,” Lilliana’s smile dropped slightly as she brought up the palomino mare. Ori remembered her fondly as well, the time they would all spend playing together in Murmuring Rivers. The image of a young Lilliana and Elena next to one another was so natural in her mind, it was easy to call up. “She was here for a while.”

Ori said nothing, simply offered a soft brush of her muzzle against Lilli’s wither and a soft expression of consolation. A silent assurance that she would listen to and hang onto every word that Lilli said and keep each and every one of them safe.

Lilliana shook her head again and Ori wondered if it was her way of trying to shake off the problems that clung to her, like how she would shake off rain on her neck after reaching a dry space. “Word is she found a land ablaze with sunflowers.” Ori smiled, considering exactly what the palomino would look like next to so many bright flowers.

“That sounds wonderful!” And it did. It sounded like a place out of a daydream, the kind that Ori might like to see someday.

The gold champagne shared the news of the change of guardianship, and it took Lilliana a moment to consider that. It had been strange for Ori to see the mantle passed to her stoic cousin after having known her brandished gold uncle as the Guardian for such a long time. It wasn’t unwelcome, though, and Alvaro had taken to his duties as seriously as he took everything else. It was a trait worth respecting, Ori thought. She agreed with Lilliana’s statement that he would do well in his new role. He had been doing well at it before she left, and hoped that peace would remain in the valley forever, as it should.

“Oh! Jay found a cove!” Lilliana’s voice sprung forth, and once again, Ori’s mind was reeling with images of one of her other cousins and the homes they had found, the places in the world they had found that were perfect fits for them. Lilli continued as Ori drank every word up eagerly. “Mama brought news of him and said he found a place where the stars are always shining. She said that he can hear them. And when the stars are silent, there are creatures in the ocean that he can hear singing.”

As the pictures in her mind’s eye stirred, of course Ori could only say what she was thinking, “That sounds lovely!” And sure, maybe it was getting repetitive to keep saying such things, but it did sound lovely, and it did sound so perfect for her cousin who had always looked up towards the sky and been able to tell all of them stories of it. She silently wished for his health and happiness wherever he was, and hoped he was able to live under those stars, listening to their stories and voices as happily as he could. (Even if the stars weren’t here in Beqanna right now, Ori was sure they would come around soon)

There was a moment of pause between Ori explaining that she didn’t need to hear everything right now if Lilli wasn’t ready for it and her cousin’s next string of words, “I have children of my own. And my eldest two have families of their own.” Lilli was a mom, too? Not just a mother - a grandmother!? It was shocking, certainly, but amazing all the same. How immature she must have looked next to her cousin (had there been a decent amount of light, maybe the champagne girl could tell for sure), but she smiled for her all the same, regardless if it were able to be seen or not. It was such an incredible thing, and Ori was certain that Lilli was a fantastic mother, to which her russet cousin’s next string confirmed.

“And they are,” She paused a moment, searching for the exact word she wanted to use to describe the family she had made, “Perfect.” The awe in her tone gave Ori a glimpse into how much she cherished her children, but she knew it must have been so much more than she could imagine (that was something she often heard, that one cannot truly understand the love that comes from a parent to their child until one had experienced it themselves).

“Sounds like it.” Ori agreed, but before much else could cross their conversation, images that were not of her own design knocked softly at the edge of her mind. As she attempted to focus on the figures, they grew clearer. Although she didn’t quite grasp exactly what was happening, she did not try to resist it, and experienced it openly.

Two colts with cloud-like locks and reddish-brown bodies, one with wings and one with horns racing together across a wooded landscape. Another pair of foals, this time atop a bed of pale flowers, one dark as night with pale locks, scales, and frost seeming to grip to her as she gently reached her muzzle down towards the flower, and the other a bay roan sporting similar scales and a blaze that lit like fire in the sunlight. Finally, a pale boy painted with the colors of flame, as blue eyes reflected the audacity and courage that must have been from his very soul.

The memories of Lilli’s children begin to subside (and Ori found herself able to agree even more heartily with her cousin’s previous statement. They were absolutely wonderful, she was certain. Even though they were only brief glimpses into the fully-realized spirit of each and every one of them, she understood the full truth in Lilli’s words), but rather than returning to the darkened world, there was one more that washed over her mind.

It is a vision of staring upwards, and Ori became increasingly aware of the massive ancient trees that towered over everything within their hold, simply standing as they were meant to. She also catches the large ferns that reach out to grasp and stroke any passers-by who may not notice them in time to do anything about it, but more than that, the way the dying sunlight burned over every sight, swathing the giant sequoias in gold, dying the edges of the ferns a similar color, and sweeping over everything as a burning film atop a sweeping mist. This is Taiga. Something inside her said. This is the world Lilli wanted to share with her, the world that was unseen as the sun hid. “Wow…” The maiden could only breathe in awe under her breath as she slowly arrived back in the present.

As Ori was attempting to reorient herself, Lilliana gently offered, “This gift… it isn’t so different from your mother’s. I can see glimpses of the past.”

“That’s…incredible.” Ori smiled, wondering if that was what it was like for her mother to use her gift. If those images of things that had been knocked at the edges of her consciousness to slowly unfold into the stories they had to tell. She would likely never know for sure, but she had the utmost gratitude towards Lilli for granting her some kind of access to the world that her mother and brother inhabited, of seeing things beyond sight.

“Tell me something of you, Ori.” Her cousin began as the pair continued walking, “Where have the winds been blowing you?” Her voice was so sweet, and guilt stabbed at the back of Ori’s chest and stuck in her throat. Her cousin had kindly shared so much, but what could she offer at all in return? Thankfully, the darkness hid the millisecond of faltering in her expression before she cast her gaze upwards to where the sky would have been.

“Me? Well, I’ve mostly just been here and there, I guess.” She mused, the brightness in her tone returning. “I haven’t really come to a place like Beyond or… like Beqanna.” A place soaked in magic so fundamentally that nothing feels like it compares. But that was kind of a mouthful.

“I’ve passed by lots of places, but I guess nothing’s really stuck, if that makes sense?” She turned back towards the slight glistening of red she could see as a sheepish smile presented itself upon her face. She still wasn’t sure exactly how well she would fit into Beqanna, or how long she would stay, but she definitely got a different feeling from this place than she had others on her nomadic journey. That feeling grew stronger the more Lilli spoke of Taiga or of her family, the odd kind of feeling that no matter what happened, and no matter how long or little Ori stayed, she would never forget her time here.

The pair continued the long trek to Taiga, and the dual-eyed champagne could only grin as she followed Lilli’s every step as she wondered what exactly the future would unfold to look like.

OOC: No worries, Star >.> I really do have to apologize for how long this got, and how long it took to post!

[lilliana]

"Truly," Lilliana reassures her cousin with a smile that shines through the dark.

She casts a thoughtful glance towards Ori, listening as the champagne describes her mother as dependable. The small smile that had tucked itself against her dark mouth remained as Lilli recounted the things that Aletta had told her about Ruth over the years - from Murmuring Rivers to where their daughters conversed now.

"We all have our vices, don't we?" she asks the golden girl casually. But it was something that Lilliana had understood well. How often had she heard others praise her mother and then witness Aletta shrug away all their compliments? Her dam would always insist that it was something needing to be done and if she hadn't been the one to do it, then surely someone else would have.

But like she was to Ori, Ruth was a figure of mysticism to Lilliana. The stories of what had happened at Windskeep, escaping away from Creed, the loyalty to her father. The palomino had been another memory that she had wrapped close around herself, just one more piece of home that she kept tucked close in her breast when Lilli felt something within herself falter and stumble.

"It's good to hear that she is smiling again," Aletta's daughter says in reply to her cousin.

At the rest of their conversation, it is pure joy softening her face. It erases years and Lilliana looks so much like the girl she had been.

"Were you there the day that Elena and I gave flowers to Sutton?" she asks, turning her slender head towards the golden mare as they walk. Her voice drops playfully, like serious-eyed Alvaro could appear around the trunk of a Sequoia at any moment. It's a memory that she had forgotten until now and that day shines brighter in her mind than anything else. She shakes her head, understanding full well why her brother had been angry. "We told her that they were from Alvaro," she explains sheepishly. Oh, how the silver-black had glowered (and rightfully so) at them! "His face went as dark as a thundercloud," she speaks again and laughs. "I thought he would conjure a storm right then and there."

The old ache comes back - the one for home and family. The one for the days that have passed. But even though there is a longing for everything she had known, it isn't as painful as it once had been. Casting another glance at her cousin, there is a warmth that settles alongside it. Like the rains that come after a particularly dry summer, or the thaw that finally comes after a deep winter.

"I miss it sometimes," she finally admits. "Beyond."

Some part of her wonders if she can still consider it home when she has been in Beqanna longer, when she has brought her own children into the world here?
When it has been in Taiga that she has laid down roots and tried to build a life for herself.

"It's very different here," she explains. "And then some things aren't so different."

Her expression turns wistful. "The sun usually rises and sets. The stars shine here as they did back home." She says, thinking of Orani and then wondering about Leonidas. Where do the stars go when the sky drowns in darkness? The tides come and go. The rivers and their currents flow, leading to that same ocean. The things that they knew in Beyond were here as well, but some things -

Some things were not the same.

"The magic here isn't tied to the lands," she goes on to say. "If one leader falls, the land remains." It wasn't like Beyond in that respect and Lilliana had been glad for it; a life on the run was one that she had refused for her own children."But the magic here seems...," and then she struggles. "Wild. A horse just isn't born with it. You can wake up one morning and suddenly you glow or have wings." Her head shakes again, pushing away all those uncertainties that Ori had noticed. But she warns her cousin because what had happened to her and Yanhua and so many others that she had known could easily happen to the champagne. The longer she remained here, the more she should be prepared for those changes. "And then there is the Mountain and you have to be so careful with that magic."

Blowing her remaining caution through her dark nostrils, the chestnut lifts her head.

Ori had wanted her own taste of the world. This is how Lilliana has known it; it could be entirely different for her champagne cousin. Her fear dissipates when they reach the Taigan border and as she senses the wonder in the golden mare's words, the last of her fear falls away. "When I first came here, I thought this place looked like a lost fairytale." Lilli stops and turns her head towards the west where the coast was, enraptured. "The fog rolls in with the morning tides and when the sunlight hits its just right," and the longing fills the silence between them. "It still takes my breath away."

Shaking her head, the spell breaks and Lilliana remembers that their world is dark and there are monsters that roam.

That it was best to return quickly and avoid any creatures that might take advantage of the relaxed pace that Lilliana led her cousin with.