It’s a rare vintage that he’s been given, the wine of her despair and agony that he seems to gulp down. There might be other things lurking behind his green eyes - madness, curses, multiple personalities - but Lilliana only sees the way that he drinks down her pain like some well-won reward for all the turmoil they’ve brought each other.
And he’s right. She is angry.
It’s a gut-wrenching blow, to realize that he’s been a part of her life longer than her family had been. Even Elena. Their outlines grow hazy, the sound of their laughter, the precise golden shade of her cousin blur with time and it’s @[Wolfbane] who stands before her. It’s him - even in the disturbing shape of a child with archaic eyes - that has outstayed the rest of them.
He’s blue-barred her precious memories, masked their sweet smiles.
In some skewed, asinine way - he becomes family.
Yanhua smells like deep pine and damp soil. She grounds herself with that, with her youngest son steadying her. Her eldest remains out of reach (and how she wishes she could call him back, wishes she could gather him to her as easily as she does this colt). She’s hiding behind another smile but it’s horrifying, realizing how like Nashua is to her. How he smiles at something that he doesn’t understand and he simply trusts.
How he just warms and gives his all with that boyish, lopsided smile. He sends it over his shoulder, hoping to encourage his brother to come closer.
Yanhua is her quieter one and it shows, though Wolfbane is able to assuage his more tentative nature. She can already feel him pulling away.
"I’ll do it!” Nashua volunteers, excited and eager to partake. His tenor voice cuts off anything his mother might have said, might have offered. Nash’s auburn wings press confidently against his sides and he comes closer, feeling the warmth coming off the golden colt. Suddenly curious (and somewhat abruptly as Nash is often distracted), his eyes study the pale feathers of his new playmate longingly and the flaxen colt reaches out with his nose to touch one.
He can’t wait to learn, can’t wait to see what his Father has to show him.
That thought makes him frown as he remembers something. Looking up, he glances back over his shoulder to where his mother and approaching twin stand. His mother is reaching out to Yanhua again, quietly tracing her dark mouth down his topline as he moves away from her. ”Mama,” he calls her out, knowing exactly what she is doing.
”You and Yan can’t do that.”
He's felt like the odd one out for a while now. It's Yanhua who has her blue eyes, who has her gift. The two of them communicate in ways that Nashua can't comprehend and if they're gonna play a game, "Play fair."
LILLIANA
all that i'm after is a life full of laughter
(as long as i'm laughing with you)
but it's all in the past, love
it's all gone with the wind