A soft smile warms her dark eyes when he fumbles to correct words that she had not thought to take offense to - and she is quick to reach out to touch him with her muzzle. “I don’t regret that you are the father, not even a little.” She says it because she thinks he needs to hear the words, hear the confirmation, and because it is true. Agetta regrets the fact that she will hurt others by her actions but she does not regret the actions themselves and she hopes she can at least sooth away that fear.
Maybe it should worry her, his admission about his history as a father, but it doesn’t. How can she judge him for his own track record as a parent when he already is so better than so many of the other stallions she has had foals by, and when her own record hardly shines? The worst of her transgressions have been robbed from her, lost as part of her payment for returning to the world of living, but there are plenty more sins that eat through her heart like worms in an apple.
Besides, in his admissions he says that the one son that he helped raise turned out well (or, at least, this is what Agetta takes from his talk). So she does not feel worried at all. It is so easy for her to believe her sins are greater than his - that if there was anyone in this pairing to worry about as a parent it should be her. “What’s the name of your son, the one you raised?” She asks quietly, requesting just another sliver of his past that she can hold close to her heart.
When he asks about whether Maze has any other family, she falters - nearly even trips as she continues to walk - but recovers quickly and offers a smile. “She does. She has a pair of sisters just about a year older than her, Beyza and Caledonia.” But Agetta doesn’t explain that neither of the twins knows that Mazikeen exists, that she hasn’t figured out how to introduce the beautiful filly they made together into the family she made with someone else.
So instead of delving into that just yet (even as she tells herself it is selfish to keep avoiding the truth) she reflects further past her pale angelic twins. “The rest of my children are no longer around.” She lapses into thought for a moment, feeling the familiar weight of her shame settle onto her back. “I failed so many of them, and so much time has passed. I don’t even know whether they’re still alive. So many years slipped by and I lost track of them. Maybe I was missed, or maybe they were better off for me not being around."
She sucks in a deep inhale as Mazikeen darts a little further away, noisily pouncing through the shrubs and undoubtedly chasing some poor creature.
Agetta finds her hope again at the end of that breath, and it's reflected in the warm gaze that finds him again. “Together we’ll do better.” She’s already sure Mazikeen will be a rather independent foal, and she can’t complain - maybe both Agetta and Garbage need an easy win right now.
@[garbage]