12-29-2019, 07:34 PM
She turns to look at him and stops him square in his tracks. The light in that golden gaze turns all of his thoughts a brilliant white. Until there is nothing left in his head but all that white, nothing left in his chest but the thrill of the passion in her thoughts. And then he blinks and it’s gone.
This is the first time he has ever felt foolish, but it will certainly not be the last.
Of course it is more than that, he thinks, of course she is right. But he sews his mouth up tight, perhaps the most self-conscious he’s ever been in his tremendously short life – and conjures up a nervous kind of grin. Maybe someday he will blame his foolishness on the way everything inside him turned bright white and his thoughts evaporated so abruptly that it had been as if they’d never been there at all.
He might have laughed if he’d felt like he could breathe. Alas, he just stands there and watches her with that stupid, uncertain grin. He is young still, so terribly young, and he does not know yet how to extract himself from the wilds of her mind. If he did, certainly he would. Because it is an invasion of privacy and reading the thoughts of a stranger is not the same as reading the thoughts of your family. But he cannot tear himself out of her mind and he is powerless to do anything but love the river in the same way she does. He has no choice but to want nothing more than for it to swallow him whole, too.
She descends into the water then and he wants to call out to her to come back. Because the current is too strong and he is certainly not strong enough to rush in after her, to rescue her from nature. But he cannot open his mouth. And what would he say if he could? It is none of his business, really, how fiercely she wants to siphon all that she can out of life.
So, instead of trying to coax her back to the shore, he follows her to the river’s edge. And then into the water. The cold hits him like an electric shock but he grits his baby teeth and wades deeper. He keeps his gaze shackled securely to her figure and it is not lost on him how she anchors herself there in the rapids. He blinks his confusion, loses his footing and feels himself surrender to the current. But the river plants act faster than the current, coil themselves around his flailing legs to tether him to the bottom. He laughs then, finally, a surprised kind of sound.
“Wow!” he yelps, forgetting his embarrassment. “This is so cool!”
This is the first time he has ever felt foolish, but it will certainly not be the last.
Of course it is more than that, he thinks, of course she is right. But he sews his mouth up tight, perhaps the most self-conscious he’s ever been in his tremendously short life – and conjures up a nervous kind of grin. Maybe someday he will blame his foolishness on the way everything inside him turned bright white and his thoughts evaporated so abruptly that it had been as if they’d never been there at all.
He might have laughed if he’d felt like he could breathe. Alas, he just stands there and watches her with that stupid, uncertain grin. He is young still, so terribly young, and he does not know yet how to extract himself from the wilds of her mind. If he did, certainly he would. Because it is an invasion of privacy and reading the thoughts of a stranger is not the same as reading the thoughts of your family. But he cannot tear himself out of her mind and he is powerless to do anything but love the river in the same way she does. He has no choice but to want nothing more than for it to swallow him whole, too.
She descends into the water then and he wants to call out to her to come back. Because the current is too strong and he is certainly not strong enough to rush in after her, to rescue her from nature. But he cannot open his mouth. And what would he say if he could? It is none of his business, really, how fiercely she wants to siphon all that she can out of life.
So, instead of trying to coax her back to the shore, he follows her to the river’s edge. And then into the water. The cold hits him like an electric shock but he grits his baby teeth and wades deeper. He keeps his gaze shackled securely to her figure and it is not lost on him how she anchors herself there in the rapids. He blinks his confusion, loses his footing and feels himself surrender to the current. But the river plants act faster than the current, coil themselves around his flailing legs to tether him to the bottom. He laughs then, finally, a surprised kind of sound.
“Wow!” he yelps, forgetting his embarrassment. “This is so cool!”