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    version 22: awakening

    COTY

    GHAUL -- Year 209

    QOTY

    "(souls are not meant to live more than once — death was not meant to be temporary, and she is so sure that every time her heart starts to beat again that irreversible damage is further inflicted)" -- Anonya, written by Colby


    i could be ugly in loving you, clarissa
    #1

    do you think God stays in his heaven because he, too, lives in fear of what he has created?

    Sometimes, if he lies still and lets his mind clear, he can remember the sound of her voice. Her words were sweet like summer berries and she smelled the way he imagines the angels might. Even thinking of her now, his heart thumps against his ribs nervously when no other force thus far has made him so weak. He hunts her in the dark of night, when the blues were at their deepest in his poor sight. The stars and nebula across his horns and cheeks shine beautifully in the ink black but he doesn’t seem to notice or care as he carelessly crosses Loessian borders.
     
    She is his other half and the world is all crooked without her by his side, he thinks. He wants to preen her feather wings and trace his teeth over the fragile curve of her throat without ever pricking an inch of skin. Ghaul pauses briefly to search the scents of the enemy kingdom before he hurries forward, too eager and too reckless to worry if someone might spot them together. Last time, he’d been found and warned to stay away from this place. Last time, he had been too young to tame his fire.
     
    A strange sort of clicking croons from his throat as her scent grows stronger. Finally, he spots her there on a hill. He knows the outline of her body heat even with just one moment with her. Ghaul hurries forward, talons kicking up cold winter dirt as he rushes to her side to curl his head beneath her chin. The pleasant clicking and crooning continues as he remains careful not to push the spines along his neck against her. For her, he is careful and tender in a way that he has never been before. For her, he is brand new and clean.
     
    Twin flame,” he mutters softly against her chest. He turns his head, ever mindful of those curled horns sprouting from his face, and traces his nose from the base of her throat up to her face. Her skin is soft and warm in a way that others are not. Ghaul eases his wings from his back so that one might curl around her in a loose embrace. He would like to squeeze her tight to him but she is a delicate thing that he must treasure and savor, he thinks.
     
    I do not burn without you,” the young hellborn mumbles against the curve of her jaw. How lucky he is, he thinks, to have found his mirrored image so young and so early. It draws a content smile across his strange face as he thinks of it. “This time I will not be chased away.

    ghaul

    clarissa i wouldn't say he's forward. just... affectionate.
    Reply
    #2
    your breath frozen in the air, newborn droplets of ice
    you were the one thing i got right
    She has been curious about the eyeless boy ever since their first meeting, where a furious Castile had driven him from the kingdom. He is the son of an enemy, the dragon-king had informed her once he was gone, and she was not to interact with him in any way. It had hurt the girl for her surrogate father to have to scold her like that – she has always been the picture of innocence, never getting into trouble – but even so, she has been unable to get the boy from her mind as the months slip by and the seasons change. There is just... something about him.

    Is this what true love is? She has gossiped with the other young girls of Loess, of course, about what love is supposed to feel like and if it is only butterflies and longing, she is not sure how she feels about it quite yet. Meeting Ghaul had felt like a natural colliding of souls, no matter how awkward the drake had been while courting her, and she wonders if her skin flushes with heat when she thinks of him and all of the blood rushes to her head. She wants to see him again and feel the embrace that felt so natural the first time, despite being so rushed and awkward at the same time.

    She doesn’t know the mischief that he gets into, or the way he has to hunt to eat, but she wouldn’t care either way. Maybe she’ll never learn the nature of his birth, but would it bother her? She doesn’t know. It’s impossible to judge him, she decides, and so she is not ever going to try. All he is in her eyes is a galaxy-marked blind boy, one who she is drawn to like a moth to the flames. She doesn’t know how dangerous he is, but she also doesn’t care.

    It is winter when he comes to her again, and she turns as she hears him skittering across the hard-packed dirt, and she wonders if he can feel the joy radiating from her as he tucks himself under her chin, practically purring with excitement. “Ghaul,” she breathes as his nose traces the outline of her face, memorizing her the only way he can.

    He tucks a wing around her and she leans into him, reaching back to pluck at his mohawk of a mane. Hers has fallen flat across her neck and begun to grow out, gold and blue, but the dragon-boy's sticks up the same as ever, never growing. “My own flames do not feel as bright when you are not here,” she tells him as she presses her nose into his golden scales. “And I will not let anyone chase you away,” she promises, closing her eyes and breathing in his comforting scent. Oh, she has missed him so.

    “Maybe we should just... run away,” she breathes into his skin, only half kidding.
    clarissa


    ghaul
    Reply
    #3

    do you think God stays in his heaven because he, too, lives in fear of what he has created?

    There is something ugly and awful that dwells within him, that stalks the halls of his heart and lingers in the shadows of his mind. He does not keep it chained and yet it does not come forth just yet. Ghaul is aware that there is something coiled and writhing inside him but it eases itself when she is near. It does not bristle or bare its teeth as it savors the moments before the dragon child sinks his teeth into her. He and his monster are perfectly in tune, even in their love for her. The world quiets when she is near, inside and out. As above, so below.

    She speaks his name and it sounds like an incantation, like a love potion pouring over his skin while he reacquaints himself with the angles of her face. The destroyer croons once again and leans his face against the warmth of her chest. Without any siren song or binding spells, she has tamed his feral heart enough to call it her own. His ears perk to catch her words and the flaming heart of love swells between his ribs. The raw strength of her fire could blind the sun, he’s sure. But he does not speak for a moment. He prefers instead to let her words be the only sound in the air for a while longer.

    Slowly, he sighs against her skin when she offers up perfect promises that soothe his muscles. They could summon their strongest magicians to erect the greatest ramparts around her and he would tear them down like wet paper to get to her.

    You could come to Pangea – for an hour, for a day. Forever,” he says with a light shrug of his shoulders. But he would understand if she loved her home here too much to leave it. Ghaul would simply cleanse Loess first so only the most devout of their people remained alongside Clarissa. Pangea would be his throne and Loess would be its jewel, he thinks with a faint smile. She would be the morning star that sat at the very top of it all, the most beautiful of all his treasures.

    Loess is ruled by.. who? They must name you heir,” he says, and there is a hint of grit to his voice when he speaks. Slowly, carefully, he lifts his head so his horns do not knock her jaw. He watches the outline of her face as he watches her carefully. “Unless you do not stay. Whatever Clarissa wants.

    And then he rests his lips against her temple, content with whatever she decides. He often forgets that not everyone was born to crush and take as they please. No, she could just as easily be fated to live free of any troublesome kingdom ties. All he knows is that he will topple Olympus to please her.

    ghaul

    clarissa he's getting ahead of himself lmao
    Reply
    #4
    your breath frozen in the air, newborn droplets of ice
    you were the one thing i got right
    Maybe a truly angelic being would be able to sense the darkness in the boy’s soul, but then again Clarissa is no true angel. She is just a dragon child with abilities she hasn’t even begun to fully understand yet – a dragon child who knows, as Ghaul tucks himself under into her chest, that the love she feels for him is the purest thing she could possibly muster. There is no doubt any longer as he croons against her skin that this is her soulmate, her other half, her missing piece. She closes her eyes and sighs as they wrap around each other, her blue-and-gold blending into his copper-and-gold.

    When he sighs and offers up his suggestion, a nervous smile dances across the girl’s face. Castile’s reaction would be terrifying to see, if she did abscond to the volcanic kingdom. The thought actually excites her a little; she doesn’t do naughty things like that, and as a matter-of-fact, thoughts like that rarely, if ever, cross her mind. Of course, she loves her family and the only kingdom that she has ever known, but she knows that there is so much more world to see.

    She doesn’t respond immediately to his suggestion, content to just lean against him and stare off at the distant parts of Loess. He asks of Castile and she giggles, shaking her head before he even finishes speaking. “Castile will never name me heir,” she murmurs with a wistful smile. Would she even want to be queen after him? Probably not – she would rather be by Ghaul’s side, wherever he goes. “He has trueborn sons and daughters who will be leader after him, unless someone takes over the kingdom. But I don’t see that happening... Castile is very strong, and very brave. He is a good father.”

    When the girl falls silent, Ghaul is there to press his lips against her temple, the gentlest and most understanding of kisses. She sighs at his touch, wishing she was stronger like him – maybe one day she’ll be big and powerful and strong, but she doesn’t have the same innate abilities and instincts that Ghaul possesses. When he says he’ll topple empires and destroy dynasties, she believes him. Her, on the other hand? She can’t see herself every being much more than a peacemaker, following in the wake of Ghaul’s destruction. Two halves of a whole, but polar opposites in everything that they desire.

    She’s fine with that, but something still nags at the back of her mind. “When you take over Pangea, will you make me your queen?” she whispers, casting a glance at his star-marked face to gauge his reaction. “Because if so... maybe it is time I strayed from Loess, and come home.” She is nervous and unsure, barely more than a bumbling child, but she doesn’t want to ever have to leave his side again.
    clarissa


    ghaul
    Reply
    #5

    do you think God stays in his heaven because he, too, lives in fear of what he has created?

    He cannot see her expression when she thinks of how her surrogate father might react to her eloping with him. But he feels the way she stiffens slightly and he listens carefully to her breathing. If anyone else hesitated to such a request, he would tear the muscle from their bones and destroy them for not being delighted at the opportunity. This is Clarissa, though, and so he only holds his breath as he hopes for the right answer. When she speaks, he grits his teeth and a sudden snort expels itself from his nostrils. How could he not name her as his heir? Who would be more worthy of the crown than she?

    Slowly, he lifts his head to press his lips to the corner of her mouth in a gentle kiss. Trueborn. The word sounds silly and he rejects it entirely as she continues on about how Castile is a good king and father to her.

    Strong and brave but not very wise,” he counters with a dismissive shrug of his shoulder. “His children are pale imitations of you, tainted by meek blood. He has allowed the laity to woo him.

    The drake gives a sharp tch of disapproval before folding his wings over his back and forcing himself to calm. What the Loessian king does with his free time or his throne is none of Ghaul’s concern, he decides as he moves back to more pleasant topics. Clarissa will be plucked from the garden that does not adore its prized rose.

    You will have whatever title you desire. But for now, we must serve Anaxarete and she will teach us to be great,” he croons against her cheek as he nuzzles her. His heart has found room to view the dark queen as a surrogate mother for the time being. She is not gentle and doting like Dawn, but she does see the potential in him just the same. It has made the transition on him easier in spite of the aching loneliness he feels when Litotes and Dawn are not around.

    But when she says she will leave Loess, his heart momentarily forgets the missing pieces to it as it flutters against his ribs.

    I will take you to Ana so that she might bless our union.” His lips eagerly peck at the soft skin of her cheeks with the corners curled into a delighted smile. The stars dusted across his horns and his face seem to glow a little warmer as his joy overflows into them, lighting up her face as he showers her with his affections.

    ghaul

    clarissa
    Reply




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