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  • Beqanna

    version 22: awakening

    COTY

    GHAUL -- Year 209

    QOTY

    "(souls are not meant to live more than once — death was not meant to be temporary, and she is so sure that every time her heart starts to beat again that irreversible damage is further inflicted)" -- Anonya, written by Colby


    [mature]  you are insane, my desire; starsin
    #1

    i never said that i would be your lover
    i never said that i would be your friend
    i never said that i would take no other

    She’s never been to Pangea. Litotes has taken it for himself, reclaiming his place in the East. There is a symmetry and a rightness to this that she appreciates even if it seems to have created a nervous buzz in the otherwise still kingdom. Kensa is not upset that Litotes chose not to return to her side, she does not expect him to live a quiet consort’s life.  He is incredible, beautiful, a force of nature, and Hyaline was never made to contain him. 
    As for their personal relationship...they possess one another, dance round one another, in love and yet at odds, magnets attracted and repelled. If they stop spinning long enough they might stick fast but its too soon for that, there’s still too much that needs to be torn down and rebuilt between the Primarch and the Archon.

    Having never been to Pangea but knowing that the river continues through it, the sabino mare expects that she can just teleport there as she does to most other places, like the Cove and Ischia. She has not yet tested the limits of her power beyond teleporting her children down to the beach and traveling to familiar places. Today she learns that it is even more complicated to teleport to a place you have never been than it is to get there the conventional way. She ends up in the river bottoms of the forest, rematerializing out of the rushing water and splashing into the shallows, glittering and vexed.  

    “Well, Pangea looks lovely this time of year.” She grumbles to herself, taking in her surroundings. Not only is she not where she intended to be, but this is not a section of the river or the forest that she recognizes, which is interesting since she’s spent a great deal of time in the forest satisfying one urge or another… Memories of other pleasant visits to the cool darkness of the forest distract her from her actual errands with the deft amnesia of tempting sweets. Shaking her blond locks into dripping cords, Kensa roams through the silty shallows, watching minnows flee before her pale hooves. They dash back when she is still to nibble at the gold that ripples around the coronet of one of her forelegs, foolish creatures drawn to a bit of glitter. She doesn’t begrudge them that, she is a beautiful temptation to many a beast. It suits her, pleases her, to be accommodated by nature or magic with a little embellishment to help her satisfy a whim or two. Maybe that’s wicked… but who wrote those rules, anyway? 


     

    kensa
    love is madness


    Starsin *send
    Reply
    #2

    and let me crawl inside your veins. I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain.

    She cannot recall the last time she came to the river. It had been over a year, at least, and she can’t even pinpoint why she comes here now. The restlessness that had taken root inside of her soul from the time she was born was spreading – not blossoming like a flower, but invading every part of her, like a weed. Fueled by anxiety and that self-contempt that she kept so artfully hidden, it felt like it was choking her, and she knew the only way to find any sort of relief, the only way she would ever catch her breath, was to just leave.

    Beyond the mountainous border of Loess, she disappears into the thick of the forest. She veers off the well-worn path created by those constantly coming and going, and eventually even abandons the lesser visible paths used by the deer. Thick branches and bramble scrape her glowing sides, as though they could pull the star-like dapples straight from the storm-gray sky that was her skin. The limbs and underbrush tug and snag on the iron-black of her mane, and when she finally breaks free along the bank of the river, she is an odd mix of strikingly beautiful and ferociously wild.

    She isn’t sure what she had expected to find here. Peace? She’s never known what that was. Not truly. It was easy to blame her mother for all her troubles when she was a near newborn, but she has finally reached the point where all her trouble and turmoils are of her own doing. There was something reassuring in that – holding the reins to her own chaos. But she was still so extremely young, and not at all well-versed in the all the things she pretended to be. The only place she could ever let her guard down was in the safety of solitude.

    But she hears her. Not her voice, but her thoughts. It would have been easy to disappear back into the shadows of the forest, unseen, but her curiosity gets the better of her; it always does. She slips forward, deftly smoothing herself back into something charismatic and poised, before revealing herself to the gold-splashed woman standing in the current of the river. “Who knew such pretty things gathered in the darkest parts of the forest.” The sharp smile that pulled at her lips made it difficult to discern if she was referring to herself, or to the other mare – or both of them. “I’m Starsin,” she says as she moves closer, standing along the edge of the bank now, though not stepping into the water with her. The intensity of her blue eyes are focused solely on the stranger, having not yet figured out how she fit into her never-ending puzzle, but she was sure she soon would.

    starsin

    it’s not like me to be so mean. you’re all I wanted.
    ( just let me hold you Like a hostage. )



    Kensa
    Reply
    #3

    i never said that i would be your lover
    i never said that i would be your friend
    i never said that i would take no other

    Pleasure is what drove her in the beginning to delve into parts unknown. When she was just a girl she had desired a place that would bring her endless new experience and joy and when she had opened her eyes it had been to Beqanna. A wish granted and a first lust sated by a land, a place that has since ravaged her, left her panting and pushed to the point of breaking… but each time she opens her glassy love drunk eyes and whispers, more.

    No matter the mundane tasks she had intended for the day, being called to or dumped in the forest fails to vex her for long. These dark and endless trees have a way of being incredibly vast and also feeling cloistered, a close and private place. Here alone is a different kind of alone, peaceful, spiritual. Being with another here is different too, secret and separate from whatever might exist in the world beyond the tangle. In her experience little of what occurs in the forest ever leaves the forest and most of it has been the kind of thrill that puts a smile on her face when she muses over it, alone with thoughts that flush her skin.

    Maybe she should leave behind the trappings of her life and live right here, another myth in the forest awaiting the unsuspecting.

    Diffuse light scatters her reflection of the surface of the water and she is absently admiring the Picasso of herself when soft foot falls spin her ear outward. Topaz eyes follow, focusing on the young dappled mare deftly approaching the shaded bank. “I am rarely disappointed by what I find here.” She replies, standing still in the river as she takes stock of the woman. “Kensa.” Giving her name with the slightest incline of her head the sabino steps out of the water and onto the shore, leaving behind a glittering whorl of silt and dashing minnows.

    From here she notes the constellations that sparkle from Starsin’s sides (if she should know that name, she does not recall) and fleetingly, like the tactile curious woman she is, wants to reach out and touch them...earthbound stars. She has stopped just far enough away as to be polite and so this impulse is more easily ignored. “I arrived on this part of the river by accident. I would not have expected to meet anyone so deep into the forest.” And certainly not anyone like her, sharp smiled and sharp eyed thing.

     

    kensa
    love is madness


    Starsin
    Reply
    #4

    and let me crawl inside your veins. I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain.

    She has combed through many minds in her short life; anyone that she came across, she attempted to glean whatever she could from them. Information that most would find useless or meaningless she kept carefully logged, just waiting for her to call upon that particular piece whenever she might need it. Names are the most common. She has hundreds of names stored in different recesses of her mind (how convenient, that Ophanim never thought names – the names she most needed, or at the very least, the names she most wanted), most being that of complete strangers. It was a secret delight of hers to come across someone that had just been a name she had kept locked away, one that had been sitting there patiently waiting for her to use it – like the perfect excuse to wear that dress you kept in your closet just in case.

    “Kensa,” the velvet of her voice is almost too familiar with the syllables that leave her tongue, her dark blue eyes alighting with satisfaction that displayed itself as mirth. “I’ve heard a lot about you.” There is a moments pause where her laugh settles in, her slender shoulders rolling in a movement like a shrug before she adds casually, “I mean, not exactly out loud. But Lie isn’t shy about his thoughts.” She doesn’t look to gauge the other woman’s reaction. It wasn’t meant to be a bombshell, or even a prod. If anything, the statement was likely just confusing, since she never bothered to explain her mind reading to anyone; she preferred to let them figure it out. “I live in Loess,” She adds, as somewhat of an afterthought. She had enough problems in her own relationship; she wasn’t looking to plant suspicion in someone else’s.

    She is not at all surprised that the stars along her sides are the things that catch Kensa’s eye – much as her own eye is drawn to the gilded markings that reflect in the sun like flakes of gold on the mare’s skin. But for her, the stars were the first thing anyone noticed, and it was difficult not to. They glowed, white and bright against the slate-gray of her skin, and she regards her with a knowing tilt of her head as she says in that quiet, rolling purr, “You can touch them, if you want.” She has stepped closer to her now, slowly breaching that line between ‘polite’ and ‘too close’, before ducking her gaze and adding with a laugh that would have sounded shy if it wasn’t coming from her, “Although, they don’t feel like anything special. They just look pretty, I suppose.”

    starsin

    it’s not like me to be so mean. you’re all I wanted.
    ( just let me hold you Like a hostage. )

    Reply
    #5

    i never said that i would be your lover
    i never said that i would be your friend
    i never said that i would take no other

    Another more suspicious or jealous woman might today be meeting the woman her husband covets and instinct would alert her that something she treasures is threatened in some way. Another woman might hear her lover’s name on a temptress’ lips and snarl, drop her ears, and demand explanations for what she read between the words. Kensa does not live in a world with quite so many boundaries. When she hears that name that is tied so closely to her own she looks only curious, interested, but no more than she already is.

    Memories of the cremello stallion’s teeth catching at her own withers, his breath like fire against her spine. She still might make it to Pangea today. Thoughts… Kensa sends the images away, her topaz eyes wandering off into the trees as she digests that a mind reader has heard all about her from her own lover’s mind. She does hope he was aware of that and that his mind does not stray quite as easily as her own. “You have me at a disadvantage then, to know both who I am and Litotes' thoughts about me.” Her ready laughter is pretty, but there is a jest in her words. She does not worry what the Archon thinks of her, she has long possessed him and now he possesses her and that is all that matters.

    There are names that Starsin might find secreted away in Kensa’s mind too: names and desires that have nothing to do with Litotes. She has many secrets, but because she does not feel any shame for them they do not waken to be plucked by the mind-reader.

    Whatever Starsin may know about her, it is unlikely she expects Kensa to step forward as she does, her attention drawn from the stars to the other mare’s liquid movement and then back again. If she is meant to demure when offered the opportunity to touch the grey siren she fails that test. Kensa smiles, never shyly, reaching out to brush her muzzle against the first glimmer she sees. She touches the star behind the other mare’s left cheek and feels only the warmth of Starsin’s skin. It would not be  proper experiment if she did not check the next star as well and so her touch trails without further invitation to the next point in the constellation near the crest of the grey’s neck. Nothing unlike the first except for the curve of  the arabesque arch beneath her lips. Kensa follows three more stars down and then along the line of Starsin’s shoulder as she speaks (words breathed against skin almost absently, because she is thinking of the luster of the grey pelt, lean muscle on a delicate frame) “Nothing is ever just pretty.” Like the lily with its stargazer-freckles, bringing bees into its bosom, or the pitcher plant, sweet and fragrant, collecting its prey more innocently than any creature might. Starsin is perhaps the first creature to ever know that Kensa understands that her beauty, her fertility, are weapons. She wields them to no purpose but her own pleasure, though there are and will be casualties all the same. Perhaps one day she may turn the tides of history as many beauties have, but not today. Today she meets what might be a kindred spirit and touches her like she is touching real stars.

    kensa
    love is madness


    Starsin
    Reply
    #6

    and let me crawl inside your veins. I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain.

    “They’re good thoughts,” she says laughingly, her dark blue eyes glittering like the surface of the ocean. She wasn’t lying, in this case, but her answer would have been the same regardless of if what she overheard was good or bad. Sometimes she doesn’t understand why no one trusts her, and other times, she knows exactly why. Something about that cheshire cat smile that was always perched so delicately on her silver lips either made others uneasy, or drew them in like a siren’s song.

    Kensa, she knew, was not foolish enough to be either one.

    Women – specifically beautiful and powerful women – were not so easily swayed by such charms, because they themselves had likely used their bodies and lilting voices as ammunition a time or two. They both know what kind of game they are playing, and perhaps that makes it all the better. There is something invigorating in knowing she can be her authentic self and that when it comes down to it, Kensa is not going to care. They are evenly matched, and for once, instead of fighting for the upper hand, Starsin decides to simply allow herself the thrill of seeing where it will go.

    Kensa’s lips are warm and soft when they find the first glowing dapple, and the feel of her touch sends a shiver that trembles along the length of her spine. She moves on to the next one, and then the next one, and she gives a short, breathy laugh before murmuring, “You would know all about pretty things, wouldn’t you?” This time, she counters with a touch of her own, her mouth slowly caressing where gold laces the white markings. Kensa smelled of mountains and meadows, of lust and excitement, and Starsin has never been one to deny herself the things that she desires.

    Starsin should be able to get it done before the end of the day today and I will get it to you as soon and we are going to the movies. Kensa is a little tiny but she has been a problem for a while now.

    starsin

    it’s not like me to be so mean. you’re all I wanted.
    ( just let me hold you Like a hostage. )

    Reply
    #7

    i never said that i would be your lover
    i never said that i would be your friend
    i never said that i would take no other

    ”Yes. I would.” She says with gravity but there is a smile in the words, a laugh on her breath as it tumbles down against Starsins’s shoulder. Kensa’s skin quivers beneath the caress of the other woman’s lips but she does hesitate or withdraw. Two more glowing dapples wait for her touch and she finds them, smoothing her muzzle between them, lipping hotly at the latter-most. Her limbs shift, two steps forward, one back, flaxen tail switching once, twice at her legs and haunches.

    Kensa lifts her head, coming closer even as she withdraws. Looking for Starsin’s slender face to brush her full lips boldly over the girls own pout—a brief  thing but Kensa’s breath catches because she wants to taste her—her voice is softer now, absent the teasing it had held a moment before. “Is this okay?” The whispered words are not ones she’s uttered before or often heard herself but there is something in her that needs to know. Tell me you want me to. She says within the velvet darkness of her own mind, giving the other woman an image of their lips catching, and then playback of the eroticism of the minute shivers of Starsin’s own skin as Kensa’s lips eclipse the glow of a dapple.

    She hungers for that kiss, the press and pull of lips if it is allowed her. She does not forget that this woman knows her husband, but it does not matter. A few of her lovers have known the cremello stallion and many more will as his infamy increases. It would thrill some secret part of her to know that Lie desires Starsin, but in this moment it does not occur to her at all to wonder if he does. Or to even fathom he might feel more than just lust for the slender constellation dappled beauty (this perhaps she would struggle with knowing) but just now she wants only to exist suspended in the desire that has flared to life, the need to see how brightly they can burn alone together in this darkening forest.  

    kensa
    love is madness


    Starsin
    Reply
    #8

    and let me crawl inside your veins. I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain.

    There are parts of her game that she has become a master at, but this is something entirely new. Men were easy – men were predictable. The glow of her stars always caught their eye, and she always knew what to say and how to behave to play them into the palm of her hand. But Kensa was different. She was enchanting and confusing, intoxicating and a mystery. Starsin knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that she belonged wholly to Litotes, but the way the other woman’s lips were exploring her body said otherwise. It was exhilarating, but it made her hesitate, for just a moment – when she thinks of Lie, and then of Ophanim, and how neither her nor Kensa should be doing this.

    But then her lips brush against hers, and when Kensa speaks she recognizes the change in her voice. It makes her stop, makes her own lips lift from the other girl’s skin, her heart suddenly skipping in her chest. There is a realness there that should pull her back to reality, but the image that she finds in Kensa’s mind drowns it out. “Better than okay,” she murmurs in response, before her silver lips press into hers. She pushes against her then, her delicate chest against hers, with her lips and teeth finding her satin-smooth skin.

    She does not dilute the want in her touch, does not try to hide the ravenous way her lips explore the enticing curves of her body. Everything else in her mind falls away, until all that is left is her and Kensa.

    Her lips find themselves caressing the slender curve of the other woman’s hip, her own breath hot and wanting against her skin. Her muzzle skims just lightly against the inside of her thigh, a teasing touch that travels painfully slowly to the other side and down the inside of that leg, too. She doesn’t have to ask her if she wants it; doesn’t have to ask her if she should stop. She can hear it in her mind, and that is all the urging Starsin needs. This time, when she kisses her way back up her leg, she doesn’t stop. She brushes the tangle of her flaxen tail to the side, and her tongue finds the warmth of her. Her touch is slow, sensuous, savoring the way she feels and tastes, but ever mindful to how she reacts, be it with her mind or with her body; more pressure here, shifting her touch there. She wants to feel her quiver and tremble, for her.

    She knows they both belong to someone else, but tonight, she wants nothing but to carve a moment in time that is only theirs.

    starsin

    it’s not like me to be so mean. you’re all I wanted.
    ( just let me hold you Like a hostage. )



    Kensa Costco cart door
    Reply
    #9

    i never said that i would be your lover
    i never said that i would be your friend
    i never said that i would take no other


    Kensa’s breath catches when Starsin answers her and though she would normally smile and twist her lover around herself she wants Starsin too much for those kind of games. A kiss becomes an embrace and Kensa’s thoughts are a whirling blackness punctuated by the glow of dapples or the eyelash shadowed slope of withers, the supple curve of a thigh, always a gift of Starsin’s own beauty according to what inspires the chesnut’s lust.

    Nothing is held back, no shyness or withholding to keep pace with one another. They burn together in the same inferno, neither needing to wait on the other.

    Body slides against body, Kensa follows and curls against Starsin. She favors the question-mark shape of the constellation on the grey mare’s side as she passes it. The two of them move together and against each other, Kensa nips Starsin’s tight lower belly before she is forced to move on as the arabesque beauty winds around her and whispers her lips over her gold and white thighs. The sensation of Starsin’s soft lips kissing their way up her thighs stops Kensa, and she is still and breathing hard with her head curved back over the point of Starsin’s hip. Finding it impossible to look away from the movement of the blue eyed girl until a shudder of pleasure drops her own lashes over the sight.

    Starsin’s name is in her mind rather than on her lips, the only sensible thought she can form. The rest of it is sensation that matches the shift and quiver of her body. It is easier to give back to Starsin, or rather there is greater control afforded her, here on even ground with their bodies neatly coiled together. Kensa discovers a dapple glowing on the girl’s inner thigh and lathes her tongue over it. Her lips run up the curve of Starsin’s buttocks, teeth grazing, teasing the black fall of Starsin’s tail into flagging for her. There’s a sound of longing in her throat when she tastes her, unabashed as her own thighs twitch and breath falls hot in tandem with each of their attentive touches. The chestnut’s tongue traces, explores, learning what makes the grey shudder, what disturbs the rhythm of the other tongue against her own flesh.

    Kensa pants, her belly tight and flaxen tail strained to the side to give every square centimeter of access to Starsin’s lips and tongue. In the seconds before she shudders and struggles not to push back against every touch she wants this to never stop, to fall into some eternity where Starsin can fuck her endlessly, the taste of her never far from Kensa’s lips. A ragged gasp accompanies her climax, a frustrated urgency as she begs Starsin not to stop (more in thought than in intelligible words), silencing her herself with her own task but only after she has cried out and sunk her teeth into a grey thigh, ravenous to feel flesh yield to her tension.

     

    kensa
    love is madness



    Starsin Ponr.
    Reply
    #10

    and let me crawl inside your veins. I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain.

    She has never been one to deny herself something that she wanted, but there was a part of her that is surprised at how much she, genuinely, wanted Kensa. It was becoming a habit of hers, it seemed, for her games to begin to accidentally fall into something real, and somewhere in the back of her mind she knows this is something she needs to break – but not right now. Right now, she lets herself get lost in the touch and feel of the beautiful girl next to her; the feel of her curves fitting against hers, the intoxicating scent of her, and the way that she tasted on her tongue. If she recognizes that it’s wrong to be touching her like this – if she thinks for even a moment of what would happen if Ophanim or Litotes found out – it doesn’t show.

    She has always been a little too reckless for her own good, but some things were impossible for her to resist.

    There is a tremor that tingles along the ridge of her spine when Kensa caresses the glowing dapple that rests on the inside of her thigh, and then a breathless moan at the feel of her tongue. She presses her delicate body closer into hers, her skin growing damp as she quivers at the bold way Kensa explores her. Her own mind is in a haze, and she finds she can no longer tell the difference between what Kensa is thinking and what she says out loud – and it doesn’t matter, because it is all the same. She can’t even find it in herself to be arrogant over the way her name is the only thing Kensa can think and say, that the only coherent thing she can conjure are pretty pleas for her to not stop, because Starsin is spiraling in the same fashion. She knows that sometimes she breaks contact to gasp Kensa’s name, or to lean against her when she feels her legs begin to tremble with a shudder that she is trying her best to hold off. But for once, she is not selfish, and she ignores the way her body is aching and coiling and begging for a release, because she isn’t going to stop until the other girl can’t take anymore.

    But Kensa’s climax becomes a catalyst for her own, the sound of her voice and the way her body begins to writhe and tremble beneath Starsin’s touch is all it takes to send herself closer to the edge. The feel of teeth sinking into her thigh elicits a gasp, and the feel of Kensa’s tongue against her once more is what pushes her over. Her neck arches as her body goes tense, pushing back into her touch with short, breathless gasps that eventually turns into a tremulous moan as the ever-tightening coil slowly unwinds.

    She is still trembling when she leans against her, her dark blue eyes half-closed as she simply waits for the haze she is in to lift. Eventually, she turns, her dappled side still flush with Kensa’s as she reaches to caress her lips at the top of her neck, before sliding down the damp skin. “Maybe,” she begins, with an amused, knowing smile slowly curling across her lips as she finishes with a breathless laugh into the other girl’s mane, “maybe we don’t tell Lie and Ophie about this.”

    starsin

    it’s not like me to be so mean. you’re all I wanted.
    ( just let me hold you Like a hostage. )



    Kensa
    Reply




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