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  • Beqanna

    version 22: awakening

    COTY

    GHAUL -- Year 209

    QOTY

    "(souls are not meant to live more than once — death was not meant to be temporary, and she is so sure that every time her heart starts to beat again that irreversible damage is further inflicted)" -- Anonya, written by Colby


    Do you feel alive | any
    #1
    We got older and I should have known
    that I’d feel colder when I walk alone
    Time - time is a fleeting fickle thing. You turn your head to attend one thing, and ten others happen behind your back. He wonders about them sometimes, but breaking his head about them won’t exactly work, either.

    He wonders if other kingdoms are already aware of the political situations in the North; if Heartfire has gone out on her own and if so if she would ever include him, or just ignore him.

    He wonders where Naia, Thorgal and Ophanim went, since they never care to visit even though they should know to pinpoint him exactly.

    He wonders if Chryseis will ever find out that she is immortal now at the expense of his own.

    He wonders if Oisín is alright with not being heir.

    He wonders if Eurwen is alright with béing heir.

    He wonders what to do next, if anything at all. Again, perhaps the world is a better place if he just hides away from it, or doesn’t exist at all.

    And he wonders about Breckin, too. There is a son this time, and this is hopefully one that will not be taken away from him. But he’ll never be a good enough example, either. One can do a hundred good things in their life, but a single slip in the past - or, in his case four - ruins whatever good or bad reputation he ever could hope to hold. Is it fair? No. Life isn’t fair, after all.

    He takes the opportunity today to slip away, to swim uninfluenced by the cold, ending up in the forest. Not planning on returning today; maybe at night or tomorrow morning. He needs time away. With the exception of a lucky few, nobody would probably miss him anyway.
    Leilan
    no. 7 | ice forged in fire
    Two things I know I can make: pretty kids, and people mad.
    |
    Reply
    #2
    Life as a ruler was busy of course. Mary made sure to take personal time to make sure that she stayed sane. In the recent days your best bet would be to visit Ischia to find her, but today she decides to visit a common land.

    She thinks her time is best spent looking for a recruit anyways, and of course, the perk is finding someone new to talk to.

    Her hooves find the way to the forest like clockwork, a place she used to always come. Her dapple head scans the forest, it was rather quiet with a few equines here and there. The scent of all the kingdoms are mingling here, and she finds her visit rather uneventful.

    That is, until her eyes spotted a familiar face. Roan with gold specks, she finds a mopey equine. A small grin tugs at her lips, why the long face, she thinks to herself. Her body changes course heading towards the stallion.

    Leilan! She yells out to grab his attention. What are you doing moping around the forest? She inquires, the stag was much more outgoing the last time they spoke. The stag who she keeps running into, to include her fathers gravesite.

    Leilan




    Reply
    #3
    We got older and I should have known
    that I’d feel colder when I walk alone
    He is, in fact, a little moody. She calls it moping around which is maybe what it looks like. Looking up, he spies the grey girl - mare, he corrects himself, as he would have to do with his own daughter too - Arthas’ child, all grown up and probably as prone to getting under his skin as the andalusian stallion himself.

    To think, perhaps by going so quickly, the man saved himself a lot of trouble with this Plague and the political disturbances of it. Fighting over the new lands had largely passed by him, though Leilan would never have called him fortunate. No, for that the grey had been too damaged. Too much what Leilan himself could become if he didn’t take care.

    Looking at it from a wide, faraway view most would say that Leilan has a pretty good life. Friends, a wife and kids, and even ruling a land. But what it costs to maintain all of it - what it costs to let go - they wouldn’t (want to, have to) know about.

    But the thing is, he doesn’t want to spoil life for Mary, so he looks up with a shrug. ”Just one of those days. We need some time off, now and then, don’t you agree?” Surely she would agree, that’s why she’s here.

    One who knew him better might know that this is a little off - or just different - from what he might have done or said in response a year ago. Less annoying (he still can be), less of a joker about it (might be more grimm jokes these days). But Mary isn’t one of those, he thinks, and he’s not exactly planning on being besties with his old rival’s young daughter (no offense meant but he’s still twice her age and in this moment, he feels it more than ever, a mental weight of too many experiences preventing him from joking or even telling her still relatively light soul about it). Acquaintances that keep running into one another, that’s as far as they could go - not necessarily a bad thing. Just a simple (or not so simple), neutral fact.

    A breath intake follows, and he continues. ”The Isle doesn’t provide much food for a lot of recruiting. It’s a bit of a downer, I guess. But I’m sure Sylva has its own troubles.” That small fact is one of many small things, but enough of an explanation for right now. Musing, he looks past her towards where the Field and Meadow must be. ”The Plague still scaring people into the safe lands, is it?” he questions, eyeing her then. A wild guess as to why she’s here, he thinks - the excuse of recruiting to escape whatever troubles might be at home.
    Leilan
    no. 7 | ice forged in fire


    Mary
    Two things I know I can make: pretty kids, and people mad.
    |
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    #4
    Mary knew very little about her father and Leilan's "friendship", and perhaps that is what makes her so curious. She didn't know the roan stallion very well, but the few encounter she has had he didn't seem to be the mopey type.

    She doesn't think twice on approaching him, she wasn't an emotional equine, but sometimes it was nice to talk to someone who had no ties to your kingdom. When she asks why he was mopey he simply responds that it is just one of those days.

    The dapple mare cocks an eye at him, sure we all have off days...but this seemed like more than that. Alas she doesn't press the issue, she just finds herself a comfortable spot, cocking her hind leg as he continues to talk.

    He gives a small insight to his issues, a lack of recruiting on the isle. She couldn't say she had the same issue, but she could only imagine the disappointment. He finishes talking by noting the emptiness of the forest and her eyes scan over the horizon.

    Yes, but I guess it is best the weak find shelter. Anyone who fears the plague is better off protected by the safe land, because they won't find shelter in Sylva. Her gaze scans to find his icy one, her view may not be the common one in beqanna, but she simply did not have time to babysit those scared of the plague.

    Oh, and we all have off days Leilan, I can admire your strength in stepping away from the kingdom momentarily. It is best to not let your members see you like that, a good walk can clear your head. Her words are not the gentlest, but sometimes she grew tired of all the politically correct conversations. Instead she spoke with little regard to there statures, or lack of friendship.

    Leilan




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    #5
    We got older and I should have known
    that I’d feel colder when I walk alone
    To be honest, not continuing to point it out might have been the best thing right now, that she could do. It might be awkward to discuss his emotional rollercoaster with the daughter of his rival, one might say. Instead, she reacts to his assumptions about her recruiting today that perhaps it's best - no weak horses being welcome in Sylva. Leilan has a different opinion about that; all horses, if poked the right way, if given the space to grow, had some type of strength to them. But if she thought differently, then he's not here to chance her morals and everything she knows, really.

    There's something comforting about talking to someone who doesn't, honestly, really care about you - spill it and move on. Especially with someone so brunt as Mary. She may not mean to be a comfort, but to him it's all the comfort he wants and needs at the moment.

    A small smirk follows. "Guess I should have known that you'd know all about only showing your strong side." He doesn't say so because he wants to be rude or anything, but really, considering her upbringing, he doubts she would ever have known differently. That's what Sylva did - what Arthas was - and what Rey perhaps had become, too, when he wasn't looking. But well - he couldn't be expected to keep track of everyone and keep them on a right path.

    If only he was a little better at letting go, life might be so much easier for him.
    Leilan
    no. 7 | ice forged in fire


    Mary
    Two things I know I can make: pretty kids, and people mad.
    |
    Reply
    #6
    She did not know much of anything about the roan stag, but that is what made her so curious of him. Fate kept bringing them together and she couldn't help but wonder why. What was he to her father?

    She can only wonder the true reason for his moping, surely the lack of a full territory could not be the source. Again they weren't best friends, or even friends, so why would he tell her anything? When he speaks she just snorts a laugh, she ponders the possible responses for him as she falls silent.

    If your followers see you at your weak point they will start to lose faith in you, the weak prey on the strength of those striving. She tilts her head to gaze over him, he didn't seem to be a weak minded equine, he stood up for the mares when Ivar was pushy. She wonders what truly brought him out to the forest today, what could be so bad to bring such sorrow?

    She was still young and so she has never ran into an occasion that brought her to such a state of sorrow. Perhaps the death of there father would make most feel pain, or the disappearance of there mother...But Mary took it as a lesson and grew from it, perhaps it was the ease of emotions her father felt that led to his falter. You don't have to tell me what is bothering you, but you are out here for a reason. I have no one to tell of your struggles, so if you want to clear your mind go ahead and share. She speaks again, this time is the last push for him to clear his chest from the emotions he feels.

    Leilan




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    #7
    We got older and I should have known
    that I’d feel colder when I walk alone
    Ah, and there it is. So strongly Sylvan-raised, she has adapted (with or without her wanting to do so, with or without her knowing), she could not sound more like her father right there and then. If they’d talked more, the roan is certain Arthas would have told him the very same thing. About being strong, never showing any kind of emotional side. The truth that Leilan had found though, was that is wasn’t always like that. That being stoic all the time made a leader look like an unreachable statue, someone they could not confide in - and in the end, someone they could not entirely trust. ”I have a different opinion, but I doubt I could explain it to you when I couldn’t to your dad.” A grin, and then small shrug follows. She might not get it, why he even showed up at the funeral (although it was at the last moment, but then, the scaled stud would definitely have advised against going to the fairies with Arthas’... request.

    The draft-bred male looks the Andalusian hybrid over. She seems to be too curious perhaps, insisting he tells her his deepest darkest secrets because she could not tell anyone about them. ”Of course you could, but that’s not why I’m not telling you.” Slowly healing, having been pressed with his nose upon the facts, he knows that she’s not the one he wants to talk to. Oddly enough, it’s his mother who has been avoiding him (and he her), whose attention he really needs. If that doesn’t work, there’s still his wife.

    But the thoughts do lead him to another question. He wonders now how much he and Arthas had been alike, and the point of all of it is to learn from it if she wants to answer where he did not.

    ”Can you tell me a little bit about your father? Did you like him?” Leilan doesn’t ask if she loves him; unconditional love between parent and child is assumed, but even if it wasn’t there, to him love and being liked are different things, especially since what happened between himself and his eldest. She would not have liked his actions.

    And now he wonders if Mary and Arthas have gone through the same thing, on a way. (Probably less fiery, as he knows that both he and Chryseis practically had exploded.)
    Leilan
    no. 7 | ice forged in fire


    Mary
    Two things I know I can make: pretty kids, and people mad.
    |
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    #8
    She notes how a leader shouldn't appear weak, a belief that was instilled in her by her father, regardless of her desires for it. Leilan was quick state his opinion was different, and then he mentions her father. Her head tilts ever so slightly, a fuse that blew at the mention of him.

    She thinks of Arthas from time to time, especially when she is around Leilan, but she never expected him to openly mention her father. She forces herself back to the conversation and simply nods her head. He is allowed to have his opinion and she would not try to sway him.

    She offers to him one last chancs to clear his mind, but he declines it. She simply shrugs, the offer had expired and her brief moment of sympathy has passed.

    A moment of silence filled the air until Leilan had once again brought up her father. This time it was a direct question, inquiring if she liked her father.  A grin pulled at her lips and she forced a menicing laugh to remain hidden.

    I should ask you about him, it seems you two knew each other..well enough you visited his grave. Her eyes narrow in on the roan, her burning question finally in the open. He died when I was young, but we didn't get along. We had different views on how to live life, and more importantly the bastard didn't crown his own flesh and blood the heir to Sylva. She shrugs at her last words, she still found the crown though it came with a bit more work.

    Leilan




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    #9
    We got older and I should have known
    that I’d feel colder when I walk alone
    The young are sometimes more easily caught off-guard than they like. At her age, Leilan hadn't done a single thing that even remotely looked diplomatic, so he hadn't exactly tried. Now, he sees through most of it, sees that she is surprised he mentions the grey, and then is desperately curious to find out about their connection. He almost laughs when she does, and nods to her burning question. It must have been hidden for such a long time. "You could have, you know, visited and asked?" he teases, not yet entirely answering. First, he listens to her. She seems upset by her father, concludes that she didn't love him or had at least denied this after his death. Hmm, not exactly helpful in his case. Unless she did indeed still love him and it was all a ruse - in which case, suddenly it was very applicable to Chryseis, and he should maybe visit her some day. Some day when they were both ready and calmed down, but he suspected she might still be angry if he walked up to her.

    But Mary's almost seething words at not being handed the crown, spark the stallion's interest more. "Did it ever occur to you that he wanted you to show your strength and earn this leadership? Nobody likes a ruler who can just walk in and sit down, a crown being handed over really isn't worth that much." The roan tilts his head, then gives her a pointy-toothed grin. "I guess that I finally won that argument." Oh, how he remembers the first time they met; him telling the grey that ruling sucks and his crown wasn't worth much at all since it had been handed to him by an ignorant child. How furious he had been, trying to be diplomatic. But it was true and, perhaps he'd come to understand it after all. Or maybe he just didn't like Mary, as much as she seemed to dislike her sire. But it seemed clear to the silver roan that it had indeed had a higher purpose. And look how she'd thrived, hmm?

    Eyeing her a while, letting it sink in, the scaled stallion then shrugs. "We never really got along, but fate had us bump into one another too frequently to ignore each other completely, so we made do." That's about as short and to the point as he could explain it, but she, like Arthas, is the no-nonsense type. If this isn't enough explanation, nothing will ever be.
    Leilan
    no. 7 | ice forged in fire


    Mary
    Two things I know I can make: pretty kids, and people mad.
    |
    Reply
    #10
    She inquires about how he knew her father, the history between the pair. He makes sure to poke at her for asking, noting she could have visited and asked. Of course she could have, but she was busy with her own kingdom...and did she really care that deeply for Arthas?

    She playfully roles her eyes at Leilan and a subtle laugh escapes her maw. I guess, but running into you seems easier. Perhaps beqanna wanted her to find out there relationship, they did run into each other a lot after all.

    The roan continues talking, noting that Arthas perhaps did not want to pass on the crown. Instead making her work for it, and perhaps Leilan was right, but the throne was rightfully heres. Luckily she has a great friendship with Sinner, and she was able to make her own way to the top. Without Arthas' help.

    With a smile Leilan notes he won that arguement and again she playfully roles her eyes, casually shaking her head. If you say so, she usually didn't care to start and arguement, but she can see Leilans point and it is better left untouched.

    Finally, he answers her initial question, but it wasn't nearly the information she was hoping for. Simply that they didn't get along, but they had bumper into each other far too much. A full blown laugh escapes her maw when he finishes speakng. Must be in the blood, since we keep running into each other. Unable to escape the dapple grey lineage, though they perhaps shaded a more friendly relationship then one with her father.

    Her father was hard to get along with and Perhaps Bane was the only one capable of his friendship...well of course until he held a relationship with Lepis. Mary wasn't born until her father was champion of Loess, so she wonders if Leilan was a kingdom member when he ruled. Did you live in Loess? What brought you to the isle? She inquires, and perhaps this time she was just looking for extra information on the roan.

    Leilan




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