Hestia looks from one horse to another looking for the familiarity of those she calls beloved. Where is Gallows? Fennick? Kryten? Demian? How much time has passed since her death? She worries that it has been too much time. But she knows finding them isn’t impossible, she had watched as Pollock aged, he was not immune to time, not as she was anyways. She must be immune to death as well, at least that is the best explanation she can think of. She had tried to die, she had died, she had lived as a ghost. Yet in all of this, she still finds herself amongst the living, alive and well, supple with the new skin, contours curving and dipping in the silk shine of perfect beauty. The beauty her virgin self had held for more than 80 years. It had only begun to rot after that, after her son was born. The skin lost its luster, joints ached and clicked with each movement, her head grew heavy to carry, her hips began to sink into themselves.
She found herself ugly, and lacking, she hated it, hated her aging self. She wanted her immortality back, and yet, watching Fennick…. Her eyes almost spill with tears at the thought of her dear Fennick, her dear lovely Fennick. The one soul who never hated her faults, the one horse who believed in the best of her, the one creature that saw who she was and still whispered gently in her ear. She was happy to throw immortality away for this, for these brief beautiful moments of real love, tangible and worthy of everything she could give. And she did give, she gave everything, she threw everything that she had been trained for out the window. She met Fennick, and from then on she was nothing to the world, but he was everything to her.
Her heart breaks all over again, she feels a pain worse than death just thinking of him, she needs to find him, she needs to feel him wrap himself around her, she needs to know that their children are okay. She needs to find her Amazon sisters, her mother, her siblings, she needs to know what happened in her time of absence. The amazon flower is gone, and in its place is a crippling pain. She feels so lost, so desolate, she survives. She always survives, and yet since Fennick… without him she does not want to survive. She finds no reason to survive, so she turns her head towards the forest, maybe some wild animal would come across her and take her sending to the real afterlife, a true death worthy of a amazon sister.
She finds herself in a quiet corner, one that seems stashed away, far enough that no one would notice her. And so here she breaks here she wrenches her heart from her chest and coughs it out until her voice cracks with the straining of her vocals. It takes her several minutes if not an hour for her to find her voice useless, yet the pain doesn’t leave, not until the tears come, and when they come they come in torrents, blinding and horrifying bleeding her eyes dry and her face puffy. Never had she shed a tear, never had she wailed, not even when/after Pollock had killed her. She had found strength in every situation, every moment she found something to take her further. But here, now she finds no strength, she want’s blissful death to come for her. To find her and steal her away into oblivion.
@[demian]
She found herself ugly, and lacking, she hated it, hated her aging self. She wanted her immortality back, and yet, watching Fennick…. Her eyes almost spill with tears at the thought of her dear Fennick, her dear lovely Fennick. The one soul who never hated her faults, the one horse who believed in the best of her, the one creature that saw who she was and still whispered gently in her ear. She was happy to throw immortality away for this, for these brief beautiful moments of real love, tangible and worthy of everything she could give. And she did give, she gave everything, she threw everything that she had been trained for out the window. She met Fennick, and from then on she was nothing to the world, but he was everything to her.
Her heart breaks all over again, she feels a pain worse than death just thinking of him, she needs to find him, she needs to feel him wrap himself around her, she needs to know that their children are okay. She needs to find her Amazon sisters, her mother, her siblings, she needs to know what happened in her time of absence. The amazon flower is gone, and in its place is a crippling pain. She feels so lost, so desolate, she survives. She always survives, and yet since Fennick… without him she does not want to survive. She finds no reason to survive, so she turns her head towards the forest, maybe some wild animal would come across her and take her sending to the real afterlife, a true death worthy of a amazon sister.
She finds herself in a quiet corner, one that seems stashed away, far enough that no one would notice her. And so here she breaks here she wrenches her heart from her chest and coughs it out until her voice cracks with the straining of her vocals. It takes her several minutes if not an hour for her to find her voice useless, yet the pain doesn’t leave, not until the tears come, and when they come they come in torrents, blinding and horrifying bleeding her eyes dry and her face puffy. Never had she shed a tear, never had she wailed, not even when/after Pollock had killed her. She had found strength in every situation, every moment she found something to take her further. But here, now she finds no strength, she want’s blissful death to come for her. To find her and steal her away into oblivion.
@[demian]
![[Image: 345k45w.jpg]](http://i65.tinypic.com/345k45w.jpg)