ive got issues; and one of them is how bad i need you; any.

[Reagan]

you're waiting for someone to put you together, you're waiting for someone to push you away

He still haunted her every waking step. Every moment she was without him, she was reminded. Of he sadness. Loneliness. Of her betrayal.
 
Of his betrayal.
 
She had gone to their den on the edge of their borders to bring life to the world, their last daughter, a small girl named Enfys. Had almost died giving life to her. And yet, as all magicians do, she lives on, her body slowly healing herself, knitting itself together. Her daughter, the child of a magician and a cryokinetic, had learned to stand and suckle on her own, and she was beautiful, and the light of her mother’s life. But there was one very marked difference between her and her siblings.
 
She was without a father, and did not know why.
 
And so when the small appaoloosa girl trails behind Reagan, those purple points an ever reminder of all that Reagan has lost, she takes time for herself in the dark trees of this world. The place where it all began. Where she had met Lexa, and where she had been when the Reckoning had occurred.
 
Where she had left immediately before finding Ruan. The stretch of the woods where they always hunted…
 
Where they always made love under the birch trees by night.
 
So, the Alpha was deposed—cast out. All over jealousy, and misunderstandings.
 
Her love had rotted away, and there was no getting it back.
 
She was a magician, but some things cannot be mended by magic alone.
 
And for every step she takes, here in the wilderness, her heart beats. But it beats alone.
 
And all Reagan can do in her solace, is break down.
 
Again.
 

there's always another wound to discover, there's always something more you wish he'd say

reagan

[kota]

The forest is a good place to dwell if dwelling is your desire at the time. The shadows will harbor you and the wind’s whispers can encourage you, even play with you. In due time the shackles of dread, or angst or sorrow or whatever weighs you will fall away. Kota has found this to be true in her short years of living on her own. When the reckoning took her healing magic from her she became the closest thing to devastated she’s ever been in her life. It’s all she’s known since she discovered it at six months of age, playing with some friends when one tripped and twisted their ankle – their writhing and wailing made her reach out to stop it, to hold them down or comfort them we’ll never know but either way something happened that day that changed her life forever. She could heal. At first it was weak or drained her so severely she remained hazy for days, even weeks one time. She learned not to play frivolously with it and she deeply respected the cold misty curls of sparkling fog that she produced with her pink nose’s touch. She became wise to its tricks, learning it inside and out. 

And now it is gone. Vanished. Taken.

In the eve of the mountain’s rising she had known something like this might happen. She could feel it. The land was speaking of it, warning whomever would listen. And so it happened and here everyone was, some broken, some empowered, some left to wander where they were once stable. Kota is lucky, she’s always wandered and stability is something only children get the luxury of, or so she was lovingly taught. 

She moves to get back on the trail, she’s been napping off to the side in the soft moss and she’s now ready to get back to her meandering. “Oops.” She finds herself unintentionally between a mother, a smoky charcoal woman who appears stout and strong and her young speckled child. The paint mare steps back, blinking her icy blue eyes at the child who bears a gaze of a similar shade. She smiles and watches the child move under her nose to follow its rather morose looking mother. “Apologies.” She steps back onto the path and tries to walk slowly to keep from crowding the pair. She wants to ask if everything is alright, but all within her tells her not to, tells her to mind her own damn business. 

Kota

those great whites,

they have big teeth

<33 hope this is okay @[Reagan]

[Reagan]

you're waiting for someone to put you together, you're waiting for someone to push you away

There was a quiet moment when Reagan had realized, that she was not what she had been. Her ability to slip away, to be unnoticed, was weakening. That she was discovered by someone that she did not intend to discover her was proof of that enough. Her magic… glitch and unpredictable, was spasming out of her in large spurts, exhibited by the loud obnoxious color changes that her body began putting herself under, flashing and turning and glowing and growing and shrinking.

She was out of control, and it broke her heart to have her daughter see this of her. Her small, innocent Enfys. The small child born a princess without a father. A father who did not yet know she even existed.

And still, this girl… who was so innocent on her own that she was quietly polite—though her unspoken thoughts were painted as clear as day on her face—Reagan could not help but feel sorry for her, being in the presence of the mad Grey Lady.

A grey lady who was now pink with neon green slashes and geometric shapes that were constantly changing and moving on her body, while her hair grew and lengthened of its own accord, changing colors… and she tried to stop herself from crying, but found that she was unable to school her features.

“No need to apologize,”, she says weakly, between waves of tears.

What else could she say? Would the girl even bother to stick around?

Not every day you slip into the solitary forest and end up finding an 80s rave.

there's always another wound to discover, there's always something more you wish he'd say

reagan

OOC: just wanted to let you know, if you read any of my other posts, that this takes place before all the threads with Ruan or with Enfys and Ruan. When Reagan is still trying to "hide", essentially