07-25-2016, 04:25 AM
I was so tired. I don't know when I have last slept. When I do I remember the nightmare of the wolves eating my family and wonder if perhaps it wasn't true. Grumble had released me. I dreamt of him often as well. I still felt confused about him, did I love him? Or did I hate him? He had gifted me with the ability to change my size for enlarging myself early to protect him better. But...He had taken me from my home and broken something in me. Something that I didn't know how to fix.
When I had returned home, they all had been gone. Grandfather and a few of the mares I had seen around. And...and Mom. Mom was gone. Panic had followed and I had taken to the skies like I had been born there. Like Mother hadn't been making me wait some until I was a little bit stronger, a little bit tougher. Wasn't that a laugh. Now I was both but I had to learn without her, learn things that no one should have ever known.
The only hope I had was that there hadn't been the smell of old blood in our home (but how long had I been gone, could the seasons have washed away the smell of it) or any old corpses. I hadn't found any bones, nothing that indicated that someone had died. That was the one thing keeping me sane. It was keeping me from leaving to find them, but if they came home I had to be here..so Mother would know.
I occasionally went back to the Cove to check. Or to leave my scent.
I found myself in the Forest today, my walk slow. I wanted to sleep, but the nightmares, the dreams. No, I couldn't. Just keep moving. It's in a daze that I move, unaware of the snow on the ground, or the way some of the flakes manage to float down through the few openings in the trees. My wings are curled against my sides for warmth, some inner guide keeping me alive. I did most things on autopilot. I would until I slept again.
A crunch of a branch broken makes my ears flicker and I turn in the direction it came from to see a white mare. She was so plain next to my coloring. So plain in general. I don't think I had seen anyone before so washed out. My interest is piqued and I move towards her. I manage to pick my head up, and my hooves so I look more....just more instead of some tired nag. That's okay when I was by myself but when I found someone else I had to look the part. I had to be....proud. I couldn't be broken down and weak.
Grandfather's words. Mother's words.
So I did. I manage to even meet the girl's eyes even if she does seem a little down herself. "Hello girl." My voice surprises me. It has been sometime since I had spoken to someone else....since Grumble...and since I had screamed to the skies for my family. It was rough, scratchy and I had to clear my throat before I continued to speak. "What are you doing?"
When I had returned home, they all had been gone. Grandfather and a few of the mares I had seen around. And...and Mom. Mom was gone. Panic had followed and I had taken to the skies like I had been born there. Like Mother hadn't been making me wait some until I was a little bit stronger, a little bit tougher. Wasn't that a laugh. Now I was both but I had to learn without her, learn things that no one should have ever known.
The only hope I had was that there hadn't been the smell of old blood in our home (but how long had I been gone, could the seasons have washed away the smell of it) or any old corpses. I hadn't found any bones, nothing that indicated that someone had died. That was the one thing keeping me sane. It was keeping me from leaving to find them, but if they came home I had to be here..so Mother would know.
I occasionally went back to the Cove to check. Or to leave my scent.
I found myself in the Forest today, my walk slow. I wanted to sleep, but the nightmares, the dreams. No, I couldn't. Just keep moving. It's in a daze that I move, unaware of the snow on the ground, or the way some of the flakes manage to float down through the few openings in the trees. My wings are curled against my sides for warmth, some inner guide keeping me alive. I did most things on autopilot. I would until I slept again.
A crunch of a branch broken makes my ears flicker and I turn in the direction it came from to see a white mare. She was so plain next to my coloring. So plain in general. I don't think I had seen anyone before so washed out. My interest is piqued and I move towards her. I manage to pick my head up, and my hooves so I look more....just more instead of some tired nag. That's okay when I was by myself but when I found someone else I had to look the part. I had to be....proud. I couldn't be broken down and weak.
Grandfather's words. Mother's words.
So I did. I manage to even meet the girl's eyes even if she does seem a little down herself. "Hello girl." My voice surprises me. It has been sometime since I had spoken to someone else....since Grumble...and since I had screamed to the skies for my family. It was rough, scratchy and I had to clear my throat before I continued to speak. "What are you doing?"
c h a o l