05-01-2016, 08:41 PM
I still can't get over the way my mom – I have a mom! – pulls me in and holds me close, the way she kisses my forehead, hugs me against her, such boundless love in those gentle touches. I hold on, letting my heart heal a little bit with every brush of her lips. And when she speaks, I nod. We don't leave anyone behind. “I love you, Mom,” I whisper, my head tucked into the hollow above her shoulder. She didn't leave me behind. Now we won't leave Lieschel behind.
Knowing that is the only thing that lets me put one foot in front of the other and keep walking as we draw close to the den. Every step brings a flash of memory, of following the purple tail of the woman who gave me my name, of bumping shoulders with a star-touched colt who followed those swirling nebula legs of his far away from me without a backward glance. Every step closer to the place where I was abandoned reminds me of when I was Neverwas, a wisp of a boy with no one to care if I faded away into so much smoke and shadow. But my parents are with me, people who love me more than those strangers ever did, so I can be brave. I can be strong, so we can bring Lieschel home and make sure she never feels alone and abandoned again.
I couldn't do it without them. I couldn't stand here, so close to the place where I was thrown away like I was worthless, if I couldn't hear Isle murmuring sweet nothings in a lost child's ear. I couldn't keep breathing in this place, couldn't keep my heart from shattering in my chest if I didn't have the ice of Offspring's nose gently touching the small of my back. I sidle closer to him, pressing against the pillar of his leg and breathing in the steady comfort of his presence, and the old hurts lingering in the cracks in my heart ease a little bit.
The moment Lieschel begins to stir, I wipe all trace of that old hurt from my expression. This is about her; we're here to bring her home, not to dwell on a past that is far beyond changing. One that I wouldn't change anyhow, given the chance. I wouldn't give my family back for anything, not for the whole world and certainly not for someone who didn't love me to begin with. They are mine, and the past doesn't matter anymore.
So when Lieschel jerks back and stumbles to her feet, eying the people I love with something bordering on panic, the only thing on my face is gentle encouragement. When her gaze lands on me, I just smile. “I found you,” I answer her simply and then I wait, leaning against my father's ice-coated leg. There is no better balm for a wounded heart than Mom's angel eyes.
Knowing that is the only thing that lets me put one foot in front of the other and keep walking as we draw close to the den. Every step brings a flash of memory, of following the purple tail of the woman who gave me my name, of bumping shoulders with a star-touched colt who followed those swirling nebula legs of his far away from me without a backward glance. Every step closer to the place where I was abandoned reminds me of when I was Neverwas, a wisp of a boy with no one to care if I faded away into so much smoke and shadow. But my parents are with me, people who love me more than those strangers ever did, so I can be brave. I can be strong, so we can bring Lieschel home and make sure she never feels alone and abandoned again.
I couldn't do it without them. I couldn't stand here, so close to the place where I was thrown away like I was worthless, if I couldn't hear Isle murmuring sweet nothings in a lost child's ear. I couldn't keep breathing in this place, couldn't keep my heart from shattering in my chest if I didn't have the ice of Offspring's nose gently touching the small of my back. I sidle closer to him, pressing against the pillar of his leg and breathing in the steady comfort of his presence, and the old hurts lingering in the cracks in my heart ease a little bit.
The moment Lieschel begins to stir, I wipe all trace of that old hurt from my expression. This is about her; we're here to bring her home, not to dwell on a past that is far beyond changing. One that I wouldn't change anyhow, given the chance. I wouldn't give my family back for anything, not for the whole world and certainly not for someone who didn't love me to begin with. They are mine, and the past doesn't matter anymore.
So when Lieschel jerks back and stumbles to her feet, eying the people I love with something bordering on panic, the only thing on my face is gentle encouragement. When her gaze lands on me, I just smile. “I found you,” I answer her simply and then I wait, leaning against my father's ice-coated leg. There is no better balm for a wounded heart than Mom's angel eyes.