Lilliana gives a small nod at the apology of Neverwhere's disappearance (though it explains why she is here today - if Warden has seen anything pertaining to the bald-faced mare). It's not something she had meant to share. Her worries about the former Khaleesi have remained solely her own because who would she have shared them with? Leilan had his responsibilities and if he had noticed that Neverwhere was missing (because what did the Ice Dragon ever miss in all his roamings?), it wasn't something he had mentioned to her.
And then Brazen had died in childbirth.
She could share it with Yanhua or Nashua, she had supposed. But the chestnut has always been careful with her children and has always tried to keep her doubts to herself. Nashua had his conflicted responsibilities to the Isle and his young family and Yanhua had his dreams for Taiga, a growing family of his own, and Amarine and Borderline to concern himself with.
But Wishbone's company does her well today.
Not only is the chestnut mare cliff dancing again (a past-time from her old life), some of her struggles lessen enough that Lilliana can appreciate the breathtaking views from the Tephran volcano. She can admire the way that the land falls away to reveal corners of Beqanna that she has never seen from this height (it makes her almost dream of having wings again). Her muscles start to light in protest the higher they climb, but something in her relishes it.
It's been some time that Lilliana has challenged anything - even herself.
The chestnut follows after the black-and-gold trailblazer, wishing that the topic they had arrived at wasn't so heavy. But Nerine's history had become intertwined with Taiga; Taiga had become intertwined with Loess; they all had become caught in the ring of fire that Pangea had summoned. It all fits together and so Lilliana tries to explain the way that so many lives had been caught in the inferno.
There is the mention of Ghaul, the fire-bringer and Dominus of Pangea. There is the mention of Neverwhere, Khaleesi of Nerine. There is the mention of Lepis and Oceane, Queens of the South.
(There is a name that she doesn't say. It is always a name she is always careful not to say and only those who know her would understand why).
"Lepis perished in the flames," Lilliana says quietly while they gaze upon the vibrant green that is the Tephra jungle below them. "As did Ghaul." Grief flickers across her blue eyes as she continues to trace the jungle vegetation below, forcing them to not drift towards the South. "There were others but their names have been lost to the fires."
Maybe it's because of how comfortable she has become with @[Wishbone]. Maybe it was because that Lilliana had already let down her guard to share the devastation in Nerine and Taiga with her. But he comes drifting into her memories, as warm and welcoming as a summer wind.
Wishbone had known him? (And suddenly, it clicks into place. Her best friend, she had said. He had told her that his father had been a guard in this place once.) Her open expression becomes restrained - like she is protecting herself from the harm of her own memories - before it slips and pain darkens her blue eyes.
All this time, she realizes, and this still hurts.
Some part of her wants to spit his name out; to curse it as much as the rumors claimed the white-winged pegasus to be. It is her eldest son - always exploring Nashua - who comes back to Taiga with stories from Elio and Gale about what the Wolfbane of Loess had been like. That before his decline, he had been a good man. (And if this is a balm for her oldest child, she allows him to have it because she can't bear any more suffering in regards to the shapeshifter.) She owes nothing to the horrible entity that separated her from their daughter and yet, she can't bring herself to tell his (possibly oldest?) friend that he is dead. Not unkindly.
Her voice catches as she tries to explain because some things remain.
"They said there was a curse."
but it's all in the past, love
it's all gone with the wind