06-13-2020, 02:41 PM
i think i'm better on my own but i get so lost in you
She will eventually remember that she doesn’t deserve this. She will remember that she is not deserving of love, she is not worthy of someone like Thomas. Reality will crash over her like an unforgiving wave, shake her awake from this dream and remind her that she was never born for this. A girl conceived in a galaxy and born to a graceless angel and a dark god, she was magnificent in her own way, but she is afraid her heart was not created to love.
But right now, with their two daughters stirring, and his touch against her cheek, it’s easy to forget.
It’s easy to slip into this role of motherhood, and lover, and let herself think that it fits. To let herself think that maybe she has someone that makes her wild, uncertain heart settle, that maybe she can hold a heart made of glass and not shatter it.
And so she leans her face into his touch, she closes her black eyes and listens only to the quiet of his voice and the sounds of their daughters shifting, and she breathes. She lets the dream last a little longer, and she will deal with reality later.
She gathers her legs beneath herself and she stands, and for a moment she rests her forehead against the flat of his cheek. There are words stuck somewhere between her heart and her tongue, things she wishes she could tell him so that he didn’t have to wonder. But the words stay lodged where they are, and all she does is move to press her lips lightly to his jaw, before looking again to the strikingly beautiful twins.
“I want to name one of them Hourglass,” she says, and she looks at the girl with galaxies in her eyes, and then to the one with a galaxy spiraling from her chest. She touches the red girl’s forehead, feels the smooth glass and the soft locks of damp mane, and decides that it will be her.
She moves to the other little girl, runs her nose across her sides – and is surprised to feel water dripping from her back, where wings might go. There is a moment where her brow furrows in concern, and she traces the same path again, and finds that water trickles on the other side, too. She bites down the worry that bubbles in her chest, and kisses her forehead as she had her sister, and then says gently to Thomas, “You should name her.”
But right now, with their two daughters stirring, and his touch against her cheek, it’s easy to forget.
It’s easy to slip into this role of motherhood, and lover, and let herself think that it fits. To let herself think that maybe she has someone that makes her wild, uncertain heart settle, that maybe she can hold a heart made of glass and not shatter it.
And so she leans her face into his touch, she closes her black eyes and listens only to the quiet of his voice and the sounds of their daughters shifting, and she breathes. She lets the dream last a little longer, and she will deal with reality later.
She gathers her legs beneath herself and she stands, and for a moment she rests her forehead against the flat of his cheek. There are words stuck somewhere between her heart and her tongue, things she wishes she could tell him so that he didn’t have to wonder. But the words stay lodged where they are, and all she does is move to press her lips lightly to his jaw, before looking again to the strikingly beautiful twins.
“I want to name one of them Hourglass,” she says, and she looks at the girl with galaxies in her eyes, and then to the one with a galaxy spiraling from her chest. She touches the red girl’s forehead, feels the smooth glass and the soft locks of damp mane, and decides that it will be her.
She moves to the other little girl, runs her nose across her sides – and is surprised to feel water dripping from her back, where wings might go. There is a moment where her brow furrows in concern, and she traces the same path again, and finds that water trickles on the other side, too. She bites down the worry that bubbles in her chest, and kisses her forehead as she had her sister, and then says gently to Thomas, “You should name her.”
i think i'm better on my own but i'm so obsessed with you
desire
