and let me crawl inside your veins. I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain.
She cannot recall the last time she came to the river. It had been over a year, at least, and she can’t even pinpoint why she comes here now. The restlessness that had taken root inside of her soul from the time she was born was spreading – not blossoming like a flower, but invading every part of her, like a weed. Fueled by anxiety and that self-contempt that she kept so artfully hidden, it felt like it was choking her, and she knew the only way to find any sort of relief, the only way she would ever catch her breath, was to just leave.
Beyond the mountainous border of Loess, she disappears into the thick of the forest. She veers off the well-worn path created by those constantly coming and going, and eventually even abandons the lesser visible paths used by the deer. Thick branches and bramble scrape her glowing sides, as though they could pull the star-like dapples straight from the storm-gray sky that was her skin. The limbs and underbrush tug and snag on the iron-black of her mane, and when she finally breaks free along the bank of the river, she is an odd mix of strikingly beautiful and ferociously wild.
She isn’t sure what she had expected to find here. Peace? She’s never known what that was. Not truly. It was easy to blame her mother for all her troubles when she was a near newborn, but she has finally reached the point where all her trouble and turmoils are of her own doing. There was something reassuring in that – holding the reins to her own chaos. But she was still so extremely young, and not at all well-versed in the all the things she pretended to be. The only place she could ever let her guard down was in the safety of solitude.
But she hears her. Not her voice, but her thoughts. It would have been easy to disappear back into the shadows of the forest, unseen, but her curiosity gets the better of her; it always does. She slips forward, deftly smoothing herself back into something charismatic and poised, before revealing herself to the gold-splashed woman standing in the current of the river. “Who knew such pretty things gathered in the darkest parts of the forest.” The sharp smile that pulled at her lips made it difficult to discern if she was referring to herself, or to the other mare – or both of them. “I’m Starsin,” she says as she moves closer, standing along the edge of the bank now, though not stepping into the water with her. The intensity of her blue eyes are focused solely on the stranger, having not yet figured out how she fit into her never-ending puzzle, but she was sure she soon would.
starsin
it’s not like me to be so mean. you’re all I wanted.
( just let me hold you Like a hostage. )
@[Kensa]
