06-26-2019, 03:36 PM
and at once i knew
i was not magnificent
He does not ask her not to cry.
He pulls her closer instead, effectively eliminates all the space that separates them, exhales heat into her trembling skin.
Should she decide to cry, he will offer her a safe place to fall apart.
He will not do her the disservice of begging her to hide her emotions because it pains him to know that he has hurt her.
He refuses to allow himself this one selfish urge. Instead, he holds her close and leaves a trail of searing kisses down the crest of her neck.
“If only that were true,” he murmurs with that same rueful smile, “if only you were not so brilliant, you could have spared yourself all the trouble I have caused you.”
He does not remember now the first time they met, though he so desperately wishes he could. He does not even remember when and it feels like a sin. But there are so many things he does not remember, so many things the steadfast passing of time has stolen from him. But he holds her close now, while he can, and he commits every detail of her to memory and he swears to himself that he will not forget. He will not forget the way her heart beats so improbably against his chest or how the heat of her breath fans across his shoulder. He will never forget the way she has made him feel.
She knows or, at least, she claims to and this has to be enough. For now, he has no choice but to trust it. He nods, silent, and exhales another shuddering sigh. He has never given her any reason to believe it, though, has he? He has pledged himself to her time and time again and always ended up straying. He swallows thickly and shifts his weight, uncomfortable with weight and unbearable gravity of the truth.
She pulls away then and the shimmer of tears in her ears slips a blade between his ribs so that the lungs and the chest smart every time he tries to pull in a breath. “I’m not going anywhere, Plumeria,” he murmurs and, this time, he means it with every worthless fiber of his being. “I will stay until you have to go.” He will resist the pull of the thing that spurs him into motion as long as it takes, until she goes soft at her edges and slips from his grip. He will stay as long as it takes.
son of caden & fray
once-king of the hidden tundra