[private] Vulgaris;

[vulgaris]

Vulgaris

"  when she's coming for my heart it feels like armageddon. "
This moment is the eye of the storm that is his life, he thinks as he sighs against her skin. He has been so patient, so devoted to the cathedral of her heart where his own love sings hymns every morning. His bones have waited to feel her near and they rejoice in the salvation of her touch even as he betrays every promise he makes. She apologizes and he can only kiss her temple in response. There’s no need for apologies or forgiveness but they each readily give them any way. He finds sanctuary in her words all the same.

Their father never taught him how to be like their mother, to be kind and soft toward the ones who deserved it most. Larva only told him old stories and hoped he understood the moral of each tale but instead, he idolized the old snake in the worst ways. It crippled all those bright parts of him and left the shadow of his soul to thrive instead. Now, his heart is gnarled and twisted into something hardly recognizable and still, it’s the only prize Shiya asks for.

How could he ever burden her with his tarnished gifts?

But then she claims it, snatches it and grips it tight between her fingers without hesitation, and he does nothing to stop her. Vulgaris obediently lifts his head to stare into the galaxies of emerald green within her eyes. Their slit pupils watch each other for a while before he leans forward to touch his lips to hers. All of this could be his if he only knew how to love someone honest if he only tried.

“I really do wish I knew how to be decent,” he admits finally with his lips still tickling over her face. “I’m so weak, Shiya, but especially for you. Life loses all its color when you’re gone.”

Then he’s tucking his face against her neck once more. At least they’re both suffering, he thinks to himself. A true monster would feel no remorse as it devoured the hearts of sweet girls like her. Instead, he’s weeping right alongside them, equally cursing himself for lacking the spine to just choose and end the games.

“Maybe someday we can have a happy family.”

And at least he means that. He imagines that something beautiful could somehow be born of two serpents, or maybe two wrongs really don’t make a right. He’s willing to find out though.

@[Shiya]