He stiffens upon my approach, golden sinews solidifying into something akin to the metal itself. The whisper of a dream floats between our ears temptingly as I consider him before me, almost wishing him to truly be gilded in the precious metal. But I discard the idea, slap my own hand, tell myself to focus on the reality of my son instead of being sucked into the dreamscape. He's glaring at me, hurt and frightened - but he's always been more than enough. The problem lies with me.
But the dreamscape is not so easily avoided - before my very eyes Abysm stretches in height; subtly, but he does. The transition from reality to dream comes is to us dreams as slipping between water and air comes for amphibians: both environments equally ours, equally habitable, equally viable. Although we needn't breathe or blink as the dream takes over, it's second nature - it makes the transition seamless.
Mama? His voice is strange, ethereal, ringing in my ears though his lips don't move to form the sounds. Why'd you go away?
Instantly, my heart shatters and the sound it makes is like tinkling crystal, each delicate peace dripping from my chest with the lightness of dust. Tears building in the depths of my eyes, I no longer resist my urge and find myself stepping into his body, pulling his golden figure into mine chest until our scents merge and become one.
The answer to his question gets stuck in my throat, blocking a thousand words that have gone unspoken since the day of his birth. Around us, the sloping hills of Hyaline seem to fade as our peripheral perception diminishes.
A shuddering breath.
"I was weak," her voice comes, muffled by the way she twists and presses herself so intimately to her son. "And I - I felt like I'd not a place to call my own, in the family. Rapt - he's both mother and father." More quickly now, as she struggled not to lie, forcing herself to speak the truth. Her son deserved to know, to know that he would always be more than enough - and that if he experienced any short comings, they would be hers, and never his own. "And..."
But the words are too difficult to speak.
Instead, with a clenching of her eyes, the feeble-hearted mother put on display her memories for her son to watch. His uncle, Khaedrik, screamed in horror as the revelation of her death on Abysm's behalf unfolded. The chaotic darkness of the memory seemed to swallow the dreamers whole, saturating them in the panic she'd felt during those moments. As month sped by in mere seconds, the hopelessness of her situation deepened the darkness they sat in, pervading all else as a Voice told her of her worthlessness, of her transgressions, of how she deserved it.
At the last, their lungs seem almost to full with water - but as that final memory of suicide became nearly too real, Kagerus pushed the memories away.
Gasping, I come back to myself and release the boy. Trembling uncontrollably, I step back, try to gauge his reaction, barely processing whether this is still a dream or once again reality.
This isn't how I wanted our first meeting to go.
But anything else would have set us up for a relationship founded on lies.
My lips shudder as I struggle to speak; how could I ever explain my own mental sickness to one I love so dearly.
"I'm so sorry. It's - it's my fault. I should have been stronger. For you, Abysm - I see that now." My face contorts, I try to regain control but I'm not strong enough. "It's okay to hate me - but I love you." I swallow, meet his gaze, suppress my emotions. "I have always loved you."
@[abysm] UH HAHA THIS WENT CRAZY
But the dreamscape is not so easily avoided - before my very eyes Abysm stretches in height; subtly, but he does. The transition from reality to dream comes is to us dreams as slipping between water and air comes for amphibians: both environments equally ours, equally habitable, equally viable. Although we needn't breathe or blink as the dream takes over, it's second nature - it makes the transition seamless.
Mama? His voice is strange, ethereal, ringing in my ears though his lips don't move to form the sounds. Why'd you go away?
Instantly, my heart shatters and the sound it makes is like tinkling crystal, each delicate peace dripping from my chest with the lightness of dust. Tears building in the depths of my eyes, I no longer resist my urge and find myself stepping into his body, pulling his golden figure into mine chest until our scents merge and become one.
The answer to his question gets stuck in my throat, blocking a thousand words that have gone unspoken since the day of his birth. Around us, the sloping hills of Hyaline seem to fade as our peripheral perception diminishes.
A shuddering breath.
"I was weak," her voice comes, muffled by the way she twists and presses herself so intimately to her son. "And I - I felt like I'd not a place to call my own, in the family. Rapt - he's both mother and father." More quickly now, as she struggled not to lie, forcing herself to speak the truth. Her son deserved to know, to know that he would always be more than enough - and that if he experienced any short comings, they would be hers, and never his own. "And..."
But the words are too difficult to speak.
Instead, with a clenching of her eyes, the feeble-hearted mother put on display her memories for her son to watch. His uncle, Khaedrik, screamed in horror as the revelation of her death on Abysm's behalf unfolded. The chaotic darkness of the memory seemed to swallow the dreamers whole, saturating them in the panic she'd felt during those moments. As month sped by in mere seconds, the hopelessness of her situation deepened the darkness they sat in, pervading all else as a Voice told her of her worthlessness, of her transgressions, of how she deserved it.
At the last, their lungs seem almost to full with water - but as that final memory of suicide became nearly too real, Kagerus pushed the memories away.
Gasping, I come back to myself and release the boy. Trembling uncontrollably, I step back, try to gauge his reaction, barely processing whether this is still a dream or once again reality.
This isn't how I wanted our first meeting to go.
But anything else would have set us up for a relationship founded on lies.
My lips shudder as I struggle to speak; how could I ever explain my own mental sickness to one I love so dearly.
"I'm so sorry. It's - it's my fault. I should have been stronger. For you, Abysm - I see that now." My face contorts, I try to regain control but I'm not strong enough. "It's okay to hate me - but I love you." I swallow, meet his gaze, suppress my emotions. "I have always loved you."
@[abysm] UH HAHA THIS WENT CRAZY
![[Image: kag]](https://78.media.tumblr.com/2e8039018ce4dff6112c167ec23e886a/tumblr_p72zjit7wC1s5a0qvo1_100.png)
dreamweaver