Bound for trouble from the start
I've been walking through this old world in the dark
There is no spite as he writhes in his own turmoil. He does not want her burdened with the pain that courses through his chest, doesn’t want her to know how badly she has wounded him. However he had never been good at hiding his feelings, was a terrible liar. The bear within him is pressing so hard on his ribcage he feels like his sides might explode. It’s unruly, angry with her betrayal. It was before we knew her, he reasons anxiously to the beast but it does not heed him. Refuses to acknowledge any sort of logic in his words.
Claws rip at his insides as she gently shakes her head, sadness caressing each syllable as she confirms what he already knew. His lips are sealed, pressed firmly against each other as he looks at her and tries so hard to pull himself together. Gold flecks darken, a strange intensity in their depths as he battles with himself. But the arrows keep coming, piercing into his soul. Dahmer, she names the home wrecker and instantly he hates this man he has never seen. Envy, ugly and green, wraps thorny vines around the bear within and he wears the feeling like a cloak. It spurs him as he begins to press hard against it’s cage and the chestnut stallion merely groans softly, eyelid fluttering.
Her plea that it means nothing should soothe him. As she presses against him, speaking the words he had wanted so badly to hear, it should calm him. The mixture of anger at the situation boiling with the desire of wanting to hold her again, take her as his own and restake his claim... It’s too much. There is a growl in the back of his throat, seeping between the edge of his lips that are curling into a snarl. It is too late.
His muzzle pushes her roughly back as it begins to shorten. His hooves shuffle backwards, trying to put space between them even as his neck arches downward and he cries out with the pain of the shift. His cry never reaches the air, instead a heavy angry roar thunders around them. The reddish hue of his coat fades as long straggly strands of white take it’s place. Curved lobes become smaller and rounder, hooves stretch into paws. Long claws force their way out, so strikingly familiar to the many old wounds that still mark his body even now. The eye remains missing, it always would. When the shift is done the only hint of the stallion that had once stood before her is the single beady gold flecked eye that painful, guiltily, stares out at her.
The polar bear stretches, pleased to be free. As much as he thought he had managed the beast, he had not truly accepted it. Until he did, they would forever be two separate entities linked by a single voice. The bear snuffles at the ashen dirt before it starts to move longingly towards the ocean, wondering if the water was cold. Ledger forces his beast self to not follow instinct and when the bear speaks, it’s still his voice that wavers slightly out of it. Tongue wanders over unfamiliar canines, shuddering as he realizes he's not repelled by the sensation.
”I…. I don’t know what to say.”
What a mess this had become.
Ledger