you're waiting for someone to put you together, you're waiting for someone to push you away
The wolf dissappered. On the ground, was a woman, grey and dingy with green in her hair. A short, dumpy woman with tears in her eyes, on the floor of a forest, begging her husband to take her back.
Loyalty that he spouted. Faithfulness.
And yet he was unwilling to give loyalty one more chance. She sniffed, her grey coat muddied from her place in the mud. Her scratchy throat echoing her words out loud, showing him the images inside her mind from this last year. A small girl huddled in the corner of her den while Reagan’s magic flashed dangerously out of control. Images of uncontrollable shapeshifting, bearing her teeth, losing her sanity. Flashing wild colors and shifting moods. “It takes…all that I am…” she says, “to stay this way. All the energy, gone. Dangerous. I almost… I almost killed her.” Enfys. She is speaking of the girl. “She was safer with you.”
She groaned, arching her back, wings appearing and disappearing out of nowhere, flashing her colors uncontrollably as she was beginning to lose her sanity. “I could not, put them… in danger.”
“You’re right, Ruan. I am a selfish fool. I selfishly kept my children from me… because I could kill them when I am like this.” Her voice is a growl, her fangs protruding and receding rapidly, her lips cutting up badly with the sharp movement of her teeth. “I am not perfect. I never pretended to be.”Her lips are bloodied up, and her knees are scuffed up, cut up from the rocks and tree roots. “I am 160 years old. I have had and known many. There has only ever been two great loves of my life. I never thought I’d find another after Plug died. Please don’t crucify me because of your anger. You are a better man than that. You have always been better…than I would ever be.”
She tries again, a cold wind from the north blowing into their souls—that familiar scent of love clinging to the air, and she begs him to remember. Her body is still convulsing with a power out of control, And she hopes he understands…that in losing that effervescent beating in her heart, that she had gone crazy. Lost control of herself, her magic. That she was scared.
That she was allowed, to make mistakes. That, despite the pain, she still loved him. That loyalty was perhaps, in the giving of second chances.
But then, an explosion, blindsided her. She should have known it, seen it coming. She could not. His Winter blew up the fascade of her trees and shot out like ricocheting shrapnel off the side of a trench.
She gave out a scream as they hit her, shredded her skin, lascerating her face, hearing his final words in her ear, Stay away from me. She cries softly, her body lacking any energy, she stops convulsing, slows her breathing. Unable to do much, lays there, looking at him. “I… I’m sorry. I will do as you say. But just know…” she squeaks helplessly. “I will never stop loving you. ”
Loyalty that he spouted. Faithfulness.
And yet he was unwilling to give loyalty one more chance. She sniffed, her grey coat muddied from her place in the mud. Her scratchy throat echoing her words out loud, showing him the images inside her mind from this last year. A small girl huddled in the corner of her den while Reagan’s magic flashed dangerously out of control. Images of uncontrollable shapeshifting, bearing her teeth, losing her sanity. Flashing wild colors and shifting moods. “It takes…all that I am…” she says, “to stay this way. All the energy, gone. Dangerous. I almost… I almost killed her.” Enfys. She is speaking of the girl. “She was safer with you.”
She groaned, arching her back, wings appearing and disappearing out of nowhere, flashing her colors uncontrollably as she was beginning to lose her sanity. “I could not, put them… in danger.”
“You’re right, Ruan. I am a selfish fool. I selfishly kept my children from me… because I could kill them when I am like this.” Her voice is a growl, her fangs protruding and receding rapidly, her lips cutting up badly with the sharp movement of her teeth. “I am not perfect. I never pretended to be.”Her lips are bloodied up, and her knees are scuffed up, cut up from the rocks and tree roots. “I am 160 years old. I have had and known many. There has only ever been two great loves of my life. I never thought I’d find another after Plug died. Please don’t crucify me because of your anger. You are a better man than that. You have always been better…than I would ever be.”
She tries again, a cold wind from the north blowing into their souls—that familiar scent of love clinging to the air, and she begs him to remember. Her body is still convulsing with a power out of control, And she hopes he understands…that in losing that effervescent beating in her heart, that she had gone crazy. Lost control of herself, her magic. That she was scared.
That she was allowed, to make mistakes. That, despite the pain, she still loved him. That loyalty was perhaps, in the giving of second chances.
But then, an explosion, blindsided her. She should have known it, seen it coming. She could not. His Winter blew up the fascade of her trees and shot out like ricocheting shrapnel off the side of a trench.
She gave out a scream as they hit her, shredded her skin, lascerating her face, hearing his final words in her ear, Stay away from me. She cries softly, her body lacking any energy, she stops convulsing, slows her breathing. Unable to do much, lays there, looking at him. “I… I’m sorry. I will do as you say. But just know…” she squeaks helplessly. “I will never stop loving you. ”
reagan
