04-13-2017, 03:14 PM
It should have been terrifying, falling into Dov’s eyes. Endless black, infinite, and staring right into her soul. Could he see the truth she wasn’t quite ready to speak? It seemed like he could see everything, every piece of her, seemed impossible that he could not know when those eyes, those beautiful eyes of his told her she was home. Told her he was right there with her, standing at the edge, on the verge of falling into something unfathomable, unknown, and so goddamn much bigger than she could have imagined.
He nodded, promising with his eyes and his body and his lips that he’d come home to her, be with her whenever he could manage it. It was as much as she could ask, for now. And she sure as hell didn’t want to push him too far, too fast. So fast, god, she was falling so fucking fast, but those eyes said without words that he was there too, that he’d catch her. That he was worth the fall, worth the risk, worth the nervous vulnerability of cracking herself open and letting him inside.
She smiled softly, leaning in to kiss him, but paused when he spoke again. “You’ll find him. You’ll be able to fix things and make him happy again. And I’ll be back regardless.” Her brow furrowed, and she glanced away, confused by the odd clenching in her chest, the way her throat tightened and the muscles of her shoulders tensed.
“Yeah. I...yeah, I guess.” Did the thought bother him at all? She’d noticed the way he’d tensed at first, the way he’d stiffened, the way his body had gone a little rigid, but by the time he’d looked at her that had faded, and now...it sure as hell sounded like he was giving her the all clear to go fuck Zor.
Not that she’d asked.
Not that she’d ever needed anyone’s permission.
But it should have eased something tense and confused and nervous in her, not aggravated it. Hearing he was at least kind of okay with it, that it didn’t jeopardize what was between them, it should have made things easier. Right? That she could make things right with Zor without losing him, that should have...made everything okay, or something. Set her free to mend what she’d damaged, to make Zor happy, to...
Fuck.
Oooh. Hello. Suddenly her tangled feelings for Zor were a problem for another day, because Dov’s lips were on hers again, and everything else fell away. She let go of it all, the only thing left was the two of them, the weight of him holding her in this moment, the taste of him burning itself into her memory. Not a drug, no, she’d been wrong about that. He was something so much more, not a craving, not an addiction. He was becoming something vital to her existence, infusing himself into the beating of her heart, into the breath in her lungs, instilling his essence into every cell of her body, making her his. As he was hers.
He rolled beneath her, stared into her eyes, and she couldn’t look away, never wanted to look away. She wanted to fall into the endless expanse of black, into the midnight sky of his eyes, their starless expanse stretching and spiraling out into eternity. Words like love and forever were so goddamn big, too big to say out loud, but god, she wanted to, felt them in her bones and ached to share them. Too big, and far too soon, but she could show him.
God, she could show him.
And show him she did. Her eyes never left his, gazes locked and love welling up there, building and leaving her expression soft and startled, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. A hint of fear, a nervous rush, all drowned out by awe. They moved together, slowly, savoring every stroke, and she was lost, and found all over again with every touch. Breathing him into herself with every inhale, pouring her heart out into him in turn with every exhale. She didn’t say a word, trusting her soft gasps and breathy sighs to tell him what she couldn’t quite say yet. Trusting her eyes and her body to tell him everything he needed to know.
God, I do.
Love me too.
He nodded, promising with his eyes and his body and his lips that he’d come home to her, be with her whenever he could manage it. It was as much as she could ask, for now. And she sure as hell didn’t want to push him too far, too fast. So fast, god, she was falling so fucking fast, but those eyes said without words that he was there too, that he’d catch her. That he was worth the fall, worth the risk, worth the nervous vulnerability of cracking herself open and letting him inside.
She smiled softly, leaning in to kiss him, but paused when he spoke again. “You’ll find him. You’ll be able to fix things and make him happy again. And I’ll be back regardless.” Her brow furrowed, and she glanced away, confused by the odd clenching in her chest, the way her throat tightened and the muscles of her shoulders tensed.
“Yeah. I...yeah, I guess.” Did the thought bother him at all? She’d noticed the way he’d tensed at first, the way he’d stiffened, the way his body had gone a little rigid, but by the time he’d looked at her that had faded, and now...it sure as hell sounded like he was giving her the all clear to go fuck Zor.
Not that she’d asked.
Not that she’d ever needed anyone’s permission.
But it should have eased something tense and confused and nervous in her, not aggravated it. Hearing he was at least kind of okay with it, that it didn’t jeopardize what was between them, it should have made things easier. Right? That she could make things right with Zor without losing him, that should have...made everything okay, or something. Set her free to mend what she’d damaged, to make Zor happy, to...
Fuck.
Oooh. Hello. Suddenly her tangled feelings for Zor were a problem for another day, because Dov’s lips were on hers again, and everything else fell away. She let go of it all, the only thing left was the two of them, the weight of him holding her in this moment, the taste of him burning itself into her memory. Not a drug, no, she’d been wrong about that. He was something so much more, not a craving, not an addiction. He was becoming something vital to her existence, infusing himself into the beating of her heart, into the breath in her lungs, instilling his essence into every cell of her body, making her his. As he was hers.
He rolled beneath her, stared into her eyes, and she couldn’t look away, never wanted to look away. She wanted to fall into the endless expanse of black, into the midnight sky of his eyes, their starless expanse stretching and spiraling out into eternity. Words like love and forever were so goddamn big, too big to say out loud, but god, she wanted to, felt them in her bones and ached to share them. Too big, and far too soon, but she could show him.
God, she could show him.
And show him she did. Her eyes never left his, gazes locked and love welling up there, building and leaving her expression soft and startled, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. A hint of fear, a nervous rush, all drowned out by awe. They moved together, slowly, savoring every stroke, and she was lost, and found all over again with every touch. Breathing him into herself with every inhale, pouring her heart out into him in turn with every exhale. She didn’t say a word, trusting her soft gasps and breathy sighs to tell him what she couldn’t quite say yet. Trusting her eyes and her body to tell him everything he needed to know.
God, I do.
Love me too.