this is all of me for all the world to see; leliana

[magnus]

He noticed the way her head lowered, the way she made herself smaller as he approached, and he cursed inwardly. Of course she would notice the frustration and the anger that simmered just below the surface, of course she would pick up on the steam that rolled off of him—the fury. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment, attempting to steady himself. Attempting to find some level of inner control.

Something that he would, apparently, need.

Her words tore through him, setting small fires. Confusion, protection, sorrow—they all lighted in his breast at her words. “Leliana?” was the first thing that left his mouth, thinking to the red-haired girl who he had seen Dovev find. It was hard for him to imagine her tearing anything apart. She was so sweet, so quiet. She kept to herself mostly, but he knew when she was around. He felt the way she healed him from afar whenever he had finished a bout with Raeg’n, the various bruises easing all of a sudden.

The confusion was chased by fury—an instinctual need to defend Leliana, to protect her honor. He had no way of knowing what transpired between Leliana and Dovev, but he knew the girl.

He knew she would never bring harm to someone intentionally.

But that too was smothered the second she mentioned Cerva’s name.

“Cerva is dead?” disbelief rung in his voice, quickly followed by self-hatred. He should have protected her; he should have fought for her. That day in the meadow, he had seen the way the strange little boy had looked at her. He had felt the discomfort and fear in his gut, and he had ignored it. Instead of forcing what he believed was right, he had left them to themselves. And now—now, she was dead. It was his fault.

“Atrani,” her name was soft on his tongue, the grief thick in his voice. “Atrani, I am so sorry.”

He took a hesitant step forward, touching his muzzle to the side of her head.

“Let’s go find your father.”

***

He led her slowly, helping her find her path through the Tephra vegetation. Dovev was her father, he reminded himself. He couldn’t kill him. Even though he desperately wanted to. He swallowed down the fury that raged inside of him, turned a blind eye to the grief that threatened to break him, even ignored the self-loathing that rose up bitterly in his throat. He would have time to work his way through all of those emotions in due time. For now, right now, all he needed to be was a caretaker for the little girl.

He needed to help her find what was left of her family.

When they finally came near the two, his gold-flecked gaze sharpened on Leliana, the tear spilling down her cheek, the small trembles that raced through her body. He took a step forward, and then stopped, remembering the little girl at his side. He glanced down at her, and then looked toward Dovev, his face a barely contained mask of rage. “Dovev,” the name was a bullet on his tongue; it took everything within him to not stomp forward and tear the thin stallion limb from limb. To watch him bleed out.

“Your daughter was looking for you,” his voice was softer now as he glanced down at the young girl by his side and then back to Leliana, trying to catch her gaze—to make sure that she was okay. But she wouldn’t look at him. Wouldn’t look at anything except the young girl, the grief plain to read on her face.

Magnus looked back to Dovev again, hardening.

“Maybe it’s time for you to take her home.”

out of the blue out into the loneliest place that you'll ever know
I carried the world just as far as I could but the damage had taken its toll

@[Atrani]