02-11-2017, 10:49 AM
She was dutifully compliant as they traveled. He felt every inch of distance between them, an ache in his chest he couldn't soothe. Even as they walked, he wanted to pull her into him. She was his everything. His very heart stolen from his chest and beating outside him. The only piece of Cerva he would ever have anymore, tainted and soiled by his blood. And still perfect.
"She isn't coming back," she voiced his own dark thoughts, "and I don't blame her. She didn't want me."
Anger immediately flared to life, anger at Cerva. He'd never been angry with her before, never disappointed in any way. But he hurt, and their baby hurt, and that hurt him further too. And it was Cerva's fault. How could she abandon them? No, how could she abandon Atrani? She was so little, so beautiful, so perfect. The product of their love. Why couldn't she just send him away, and love their baby. He could've settled for that, he lied to himself. But she hadn't wanted him, hadn't wanted their child.
I will want you enough for the both of us, he promised softly, burying the bitter hurt of abandonment as he eased closer. His body heat reached for her as eagerly as he did, but he was hesitant to touch her, hesitant to wrap around her and cradle her so close as he wanted to. So he didn't. Each time she pulled out of his embrace cut him deeper. He wasn't sure he could take another rejection from her just then. But he also couldn't go without touching her, needed to feel her.
His breath warmed her little cheek, longing to draw his mouth along that beautiful inverted blaze. How could his heart hurt when it was there before him so peacefully, beating in her. How could he survive ever losing her. He wouldn't. He couldn't lose her. So he didn't smother her until she broke, tried to keep himself carefully apart, from taking what he wanted. For her. Because she didn't truly want him too, did she. But maybe she could one day. Maybe she would want him too.
I will love you for the both of us too. I'll be all you ever need.
Promises he would always keep.
His mouth hovered along her pretty face, wishing he could just touch her and know she wanted him to. He sighed quietly, drifted to her little crest and began to carefully groom her. Each stroke and tug was gentle, methodical. She was beautiful, his little heart. He would keep her that way. He would learn to look after someone more than himself. Are you hungry, love? There's a woman that will feed you, but you must wait til morning. Will you be alright til then? It didn't matter that he hadn't asked if the mare would nurse her along with her twins; what mother could turn away a hungry little mouth, especially this one. He'd much prefer if he could do it himself. He wanted to be all she ever needed.
Are you happy, my heart? he asked softly, pulling away from her little mane enough to look into hollow eyes. Ruined by him, but so beautiful. Please be happy with me.
"She isn't coming back," she voiced his own dark thoughts, "and I don't blame her. She didn't want me."
Anger immediately flared to life, anger at Cerva. He'd never been angry with her before, never disappointed in any way. But he hurt, and their baby hurt, and that hurt him further too. And it was Cerva's fault. How could she abandon them? No, how could she abandon Atrani? She was so little, so beautiful, so perfect. The product of their love. Why couldn't she just send him away, and love their baby. He could've settled for that, he lied to himself. But she hadn't wanted him, hadn't wanted their child.
I will want you enough for the both of us, he promised softly, burying the bitter hurt of abandonment as he eased closer. His body heat reached for her as eagerly as he did, but he was hesitant to touch her, hesitant to wrap around her and cradle her so close as he wanted to. So he didn't. Each time she pulled out of his embrace cut him deeper. He wasn't sure he could take another rejection from her just then. But he also couldn't go without touching her, needed to feel her.
His breath warmed her little cheek, longing to draw his mouth along that beautiful inverted blaze. How could his heart hurt when it was there before him so peacefully, beating in her. How could he survive ever losing her. He wouldn't. He couldn't lose her. So he didn't smother her until she broke, tried to keep himself carefully apart, from taking what he wanted. For her. Because she didn't truly want him too, did she. But maybe she could one day. Maybe she would want him too.
I will love you for the both of us too. I'll be all you ever need.
Promises he would always keep.
His mouth hovered along her pretty face, wishing he could just touch her and know she wanted him to. He sighed quietly, drifted to her little crest and began to carefully groom her. Each stroke and tug was gentle, methodical. She was beautiful, his little heart. He would keep her that way. He would learn to look after someone more than himself. Are you hungry, love? There's a woman that will feed you, but you must wait til morning. Will you be alright til then? It didn't matter that he hadn't asked if the mare would nurse her along with her twins; what mother could turn away a hungry little mouth, especially this one. He'd much prefer if he could do it himself. He wanted to be all she ever needed.
Are you happy, my heart? he asked softly, pulling away from her little mane enough to look into hollow eyes. Ruined by him, but so beautiful. Please be happy with me.
