He is everything and nothing. He can be anything he wants, but for all he is, he nothing that he desires to be. Shame, hate, bitterness, and pain. It balls up, coiling around itself. Folding around him like a warm blanket, as much as he hates it, he feels comfortable with it. It coos to him poisonious words. It kills the happy memories with mocking laughter.
Creating a dark smokey world that is stiffling. Sufficating, that is what he is, each breath shame, each look pain. He knows what they see. The black family of the Valley had brought darkness to the land. He had shamed his mother, his father had shamed him. Its a standstill. A deafening silence that clouds his mind. Pride in his heritage was all but gone. He couldn't know just how much like his mother he was. How much she felt the same. But something, something secret inside is soul told him that she knew exactly what he was feeling.
A failure, thats all, he would have to right the wrongs of his father a failure to the Valley and his family. Instead of staying and supporting his children the man had run off. As much as he the pain, he couldn't help but blame his father just as much as he blamed the asshole that commited the crime.
Maybe he could start over in the Tundra, maybe there would still be hope for him somewhere. Maybe there was a place that wouldn't look at him and whisper of the run away king. Neither do I He states quietly. Taking a step, then another he scrutinizes her. There was something piculiarly familiar about her. Something nagging at the back of his brain. And just as she is bright and vividly colored, he is simple, simple and plain. He begins to make a wide arching circle around her.
Testing her, trying to see what kind of reaction he could get from her. What was she like? What attracted him to her with such magnitism. Part of him had to know. In the dark recesses of his mind he could feel a calm in her presence, almost a silencer to the boiling anger that laid just beneath the surface.
Kryten