I'm your Queen, you're my Ruler.
She hadn’t asked for his attention, for his companionship, but it didn’t meant that it didn’t flatter her. Underneath all the masks and appearances laid an insecure girl. And which girl didn’t like the flattered feeling of a male that shows interest. However, that didn’t mean that Esileif would show it. In her opinion it would make her look weak, even weaker with her outburst, and she had always had trouble with admitting things that would make her seem less. So it did hurt her to hear those words and seeing him turn away. The spoiled little princess inside of her only seemed displeased, it would be below her dignity to call him back to her. She wouldn’t beg, desperate to believe that she held up her pride like that.
Her previous tantrum is slowly forgotten as he does turn back to her, conflicting her once again. Why would he come back to her, Esileif knows that she hadn’t been very friendly to him, yet it was something she could not help – or at least, she liked to believe that, she convinced herself to believe that. Yet that didn’t mean that his bow left a sour taste in her mouth and on top of that the bay and faintly orangey white girl didn’t know how to react to it. As Esileif looks at him her heart clenches slightly, suddenly feeling so little – even smaller than him – next to the short stallion.
As a real Queen should ask she tries to hide her inner struggles and as she succeeds to hide her conflicting feelings inside of her a small smile adorns her lips. It’s not a big one and it isn’t fully meant yet, but at least she has the heart to be polite, like a queen would do in such situation. Instead of throwing a fit like a spoiled princess that was. ”Please Fynnegan, don’t disgrace me or real royals by addressing me in such way” she replies, still a little too stiff and a little harsher than she should, but compared to before the tone is much more friendlier and appropriate.
She wouldn’t want any more than to just ignore his question, to just pretend she hadn’t heard it. But Esileif also didn’t know how she could explain that little accident to him without admitting her wrongdoings, without speaking bad of herself. As she desperately searches to be someone, to gain fame through a purpose and accomplishments, it feels like a contradict to make herself less. ”I.. I was a.. little frustrated with some recent.. developments in life” she eventually answers him. It isn’t a lie, but it isn’t the entire truth either. Yet Esileif does hope that his curiosity doesn’t push him to question her further.
Esileif