Gale
this is going to break me clean in two --
this is going to bring me close to you
Despite the depravities for which his body is responsible, Gale still flinches at the idea of murder. He had known to expect no less, and remembers far worse, but expectation is not the same as preparation. He’d killed an angel? Gale swallows, feeling as though there is a mountain range traveling down his throat as he does, and the words that he thinks he wants to say cannot find a way around. Perhaps this is a good thing, for he has never been the most adept at wordsmithing, and finding the proper words to convey the enormity of his regret is as difficult as keeping his lightning in check.
Yet the violence that Casimira speaks of is strangely absent in her tone, and she forgives him before he can even apologize.
Her eyes were closed, but when she opens them he is watching her intently, his expression caught somewhere between concern and bewilderment. How can she forgive him so readily, and be so sure of her mother’s revival and forgiveness? An angel, she’d said.
Not everyone will be forgiving, Casimira tells him, and he feels the familiar churning, and must push away the memories. Some things he had done are unforgivable, he knows. And even if the white mare in front of him has absolved him of the death of her mother, there are some atrocities beyond pardon.
“I don’t deserve forgiveness.” He says solemnly to her hesitant smile. He is not smiling back, but he does try for something better than the chaos that spins internally, managing to keep all but the lightning that darts along his skin. “I mean to do what I can to make amends, but…” Gale’s voice trails off with his thoughts, having arrived at the same inevitable conclusion that he always has. He could use the lightning.
His reluctance to use magic has kept him here on this island, has kept his shape equine and his eyes unaided. To use magic is to remember what he’s done, and he is not ready for that yet. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be ready.
“I don’t even know where to start.”
@Casimira
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Gale
