[mature] There's a voice and its trying to drag me down

[Obscene]

Don't look back, nothing left to see
I can feel you though, wake me from this dreamin

They had both lost a part of themselves when the South had fallen. He hadn’t doubted that the former Loessian Queen had understood exactly what he had needed to do on his own and had, correctly, assumed that she would need to do the same. Would need to see it for herself… By herself. Did she also see ghosts amongst the waves as he did? Or was it a different kind of spirit that haunted her?

The frustration he had been battling since their return can no longer be leashed, now that they are alone. For the last few days he had been unsettlingly quiet around Aela and Cheri. He only spoke when needed, healed when and if Cheri wanted it, fell back down into bad habits, and for the most part kept his focus on the only plan they had. Find who was left and rebuild. So far the only success he had found was being reunited with Light. That and Cheri was finally no longer so brittle and breakable.

There is a hardness in her eyes that hadn’t been there before but he does not flinch before it. Instead his own mouth tightens, the red of his eyes darkening with understanding. He knows that wall, he recognizes the armor she has placed herself in. Armor so similar to his own. She is illuminated with power and beauty, the crystals along her forehead shimmering with light, and one of those fog like dreams passes through his head. Like a memory. He reaches for it but as always his fingers pass right through, finding nothing to hold on to.

”If that’s what you’d like.”

Her tone is as cold and calm as his own and he regards her for a moment, as if teetering on a razor edged sword. This was a conversation that was long overdue. That first day in the ruins he had felt as if he might explode at her and perhaps he would have if Aela hadn’t been present. Now his anger had cooled, there had been some time to process, but it hadn’t died out completely. Still, he does not raise his voice at her. What good would that do when she had donned her steel?

Light dances above him and he glances back up at it before looking back at her. “Light is quite unhappy with you.” He finally says in clipped words that hold his smoldering vexation, searching the elegant lines of her face. “He seems to think you are the reason behind our disappearance. He isn’t wrong is he?” It’s not really a question when he already knows the answer. Exhaling slowly, he takes a step towards the mare who had uprooted his life the moment he had laid eyes on her. “What did you do?” He asks quietly, blazing eyes burning into the cool jaded stone he finds in her gaze, but his tone is surprisingly not filled with accusation. And there it is again, that wisp of something that he just can’t seem to grasp.

His brow furrows, wincing, as he shakes his head and gold glitters in the pale light. “I can’t…” And the word stops on his tongue, physically unable to be said. Remember. What he had wanted to say was remember. But apparently the Fae in him had seen that word as a lie. So were these memories after all? He snorts in exasperation and tries again with more success. “I’m confused. The last certain memory I have was being here. With you. There are these other bits and pieces and they don’t seem real. I look at you..” He hesitates, trying to find a way past those cold walls, to find the chink that she had found in him. “I look at you and see hints of a life that doesn’t exist.” His gaze is unwavering as he watches her carefully. “But it did exist, didn’t it?”

obscene

@Cheri