They have spoken more of kingdom than personal matters in all of Erebor’s lifetime. For them, kingdom matters were personal matters. Neither mother nor son knew how to separate the two. They were the Chamber, and the Chamber was them. Straia has never existed as a separate entity outside of the Chamber, and neither has her son. It’s always baffled her that others actually can live and simply serve themselves.
And for this reason, they fall into talk of the various kingdoms easily. She doesn’t mention his absence. She’s aware that he knows that the ravens tell her everything. And besides, she may not be the world’s most attentive mother, but she isn’t absent either. She does notice when her son goes missing.
“The ravens squawk about a few new horses. The peace caste is led by someone who won by default, so in essence it is currently led by no one. They have no general as of yet, and more horses calling themselves residents than anything else. Though their king is, apparently, active in the field.” She rolls her shoulders slightly in a shrug. Eight has let his kingdom die, and had left her without an ally. She thinks that whatever debt she might have owed him is just about null and void now. He’s just lucky she didn’t take over the Valley with the Chamber when he failed it so epically.
“Assuming Camrynn doesn’t block the ravens, yes, we will.” Straia is not as powerful as the magicians. There is much she can do, certainly, but of course there’s the obvious limitation that she cannot simply do whatever she wants. “Rodrik was from the Amazons, so yes. Though I don’t know that there has been much love between the Amazons and the Chamber other than that connection. And while Scorch may have held me in at least somewhat high regard for being related to Kagerou, I don’t think Lagertha will care.”
She pauses. She isn’t sure which she’d prefer either. She’d prefer, as it turns out, the Valley. But they were proving themselves worthless. “Camrynn seems more like to play dirty. Though I gather Lagertha simply wants a raid, so she might be persuaded.” Though persuading Lagertha and persuading the rest of the Amazonian women would be two very different things. That was not a kingdom of sheep.
The topic switches though, and it is strange ground for both of them. She’s not terribly good at having feelings. Once upon a time she had them, and then she locked them away rather tightly. What good did it do for her to dwell on sadness or loss? If she felt either of those things, how would she ever rule the Chamber? She cannot care about the girl that was killed as an experiment. It was necessary. She cannot worry about the bunnies that Shaytan kills, or what being captured as a young prince and surrounded by wolves might do to one’s psyche. Why? Because if she cared about any of these things, she could not serve the Chamber.
But of course, sometimes she pities the girl that died for no reason. Sometimes, she wonders what her life would have been like if Frostweaver had not been murdered. Sometimes, she misses her mother.
It takes him some time, the words coming slowly and uncertainly. But for once, she is not impatient, not annoyed. She gives him the time to find the words, aware that her son has always been intellectual and introspective. He’s too aware of himself for his own good sometimes.
When he finishes, she does soften his feelings with some nonsense. Does not tell him it will be all right, that he’ll get past it. Will he? He seems to be, certainly, but likely there will nightmares. Less frequent, but how can she say that they will go away? How can she say that it will be all right when it never really will be. No, it will only fade, made easier by the passage of time but never gone. You cannot un-live experiences.
Instead, she says, “Did I ever tell you that your grandmother, my mother, was murdered? I was only a year or so. Her sister, half dragon at the time, landed in this kingdom in a rage over it.” She doesn’t go into details. The point is simply the point, and she knows he’s smart enough to get it. Her experience is not his experience, certainly. It is rather just an illustration that the past becomes the past, eventually. Mostly. And then she adds, because if anyone can know, it is Erebor. “I believe, though I do not know, that Rodrik killed her.”
straia
the raven queen of the chamber
Use of mild power playing is allowed; no injuries without permission