Gale this is going to break me clean in two -- this is going to bring me close to you
She turns away, but it is only to pace, and Gale swallows down the worried way his heart had leapt midway up his throat.
Having mastered at least a small part of his shifting, Gale had been elated to show it to Mazikeen. He wanted her to see it first, before anyone else, and he’d not really stopped to consider why. That she had edged her way into his affections like a soft-edged burr – unexpected and difficult to remove – he realizes, but he’d been sure that he would be able to keep his distance when he was planning this visit back on Islandres. He hadn’t, but at least Mazikeen is doing so now, pacing back and forth ahead of him.
She sounds agitated, and he settles his blue gaze on the ground midway between the points of her pacing rather than try to meet her moving gaze. She doesn’t understand, and he shakes his head because the words won’t come. “It’s not…” he tries, “I don’t…” and then he shrugs because he’s not really sure he understands what he thought he was doing anymore either.
He doesn’t want to keep his distance. He can’t be friends with Mazikeen. He can’t be anything to her at all and coming here had been a mistake. His head begin to shake again, and he finally knows what to say, but then she’s speaking again, from what he suspects is as far away from him as she can be without having to shout. He is glad that he’s not meeting her gaze when she speaks, because then she’d see the hope reflected there. Because that is what he wants too, what he wants but won’t let himself have.
Gale had assumed Mazikeen rather wise in ways of the heart, being both beautiful and powerful, and to hear her admit uncertainty causes him to stare even harder at the moss and lichen that cover the stone of the mountainside. If he looks at her, she will know. Gale recognizes his own inability to disguise his thoughts, and so rather than meet Maze’s keen gaze he watches a pair of ants carry a thin blade of grass that had been blown here from a distant meadow below. If he looks at her, he will tell her everything. And then she will be able to convince him that isolating himself is not for the best. Gale cannot risk it.
So he closes his eyes, and takes a long breath. Mazikeen asks what he wants, and Gale is able to use his magic to look elsewhere, even while his physical eyes meet Mazikeen’s with a mild frown. “I want to get this battle out of the way.” He says, and his voice grows firmer with each word. “And then I think it is best if we go our separate ways.”
Gale needs to get back to Islandres anyway. He has plans to make, preparations for the future. There will need to be someone ready to lead – an heir – and Gale’s not yet been fully honest with Erne about what waits for him. Gale wonders if the Curse affect the osprey, and if there is a way to save his companion. He still needs to tell Eyas, and then his other siblings.
With his thoughts elsewhere, the rapid fire pace of his heart has slowed somewhat, and he is able to gain enough control to once more see through his eyes, and at Mazikeen in front of him. Gale is very sure that he can keep it together for the length of a battle. She’s a horse now, so he’ll be better at manipulating her vision. She knows what such an attack will feel like, he reasons, and perhaps fight it off better. There are a myriad of possibilities, thoughts and tangents that do not bother him during a true battle, and Gale shakes his head to rid himself of them.
It's mildly effective, even if it leaves his hair standing at odd angles and a scowl on his dark face
@[Mazikeen]
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