- it's in the eyes, i can tell you will always be danger -
we had it tonight, why do we always seek absolution?
LILLIANA
If she had known that Yanhua compared his emotional state to a tree or a rock, Lilliana might have smiled. She had joked with Neverwhere about it once, wondering if forests could remember the children that laughed below their bowered branches, could recall the lovers that gave such large pieces of their hearts (souls?) that remnants still beat through the decades and centuries that came after. (And to that, she vividly remembers Neverwhere saying: 'What can a tree have to say? For one hundred years, I’ve watched 10 million generations of squirrels bury their acorns, have their children, and die?') She is careful, though, with her horned son and her memories are carefully compartmentalized, tucked safely away somewhere beneath that red-gold coat of hers. It's hard to keep the most precious away, where her most beloved memories are stored.
It's perhaps why it so for her to blink and see one those memories made flesh standing well above her.
His well-mannered restraint reminds Lilliana that it very much a man standing in front of her now, replacing the fearful youth who often lingers in her mind. He smiles these days instead of hanging back with a cautious expression and that makes her smile in return, warm and bright like the sunshine filtering from the mostly-hidden sky above them. He's right, she thinks. Lilliana had sought to bring some of her heritage here, to try and replicate that had aided her ancestors (the ones born outside Beqanna). Unifying the North didn't come without risk; especially when the figure-head that they had rallied behind was a Dragon. (But there are so many across the realms during these times and this had been her attempt at fighting fire with ice.)
They stand for a moment and then the chestnut mare inclines her head, inviting her son to walk alongside her. "No Overlords or Empresses here today," she says with a quirked smile. "Just Yanhua of Taiga and his elderly mother." Her humor sparks from her eyes, hoping to draw it out in her youngest son. Lilliana has hardly seen a decade and there will be, like Yan, many more to come.
The thought of her blowing anyone away makes her laugh but the image colors it. There is a moment that follows where she cast a thoughtful glance his way, wondering if a united Beqanna as one was something he wished for. It wasn't something that Lilliana had considered; she had hardly considered where she placed a hoof before Taiga. And then after, she had started to string together days that have become weeks, and only now has she started to think of time in the perspective of years.
Time that she has finally allowed herself to have after a childhood of trading the safety of one place for another.
She slows a bit, as careful in her stride as he is with his laughter, when he broaches the topic of the Alliance. Lilliana knows what it is. Leilan had mentioned it during their last meeting and Brazen had filled in the holes that she had in her knowledge (all she knew was that regal Kagerus had once contended in the tournament). It takes her a moment and finally, Lilliana loosens the knot in her chest with a quiet exhale.
"Taiga would be honored to have you represent the Redwoods," she says. She glances down the trail, hoping to catch sight of Izora Lethia who could often be found on this side of the forest at this hour. An ear even flicks as she tries to listen for the sound of her daughter, Clarie, laughing somewhere beneath the trees. The golden star against his broadening chest catches her attention and there is love swelling and overfilling in her own at this moment for Yanhua when she looks back up at him. (She suspects his ulterior motive, but she adores him for it.) Slowly, she adds, "And formally," (because she also suspects that he'd have her address him first as a Councilmember than his mother), "you have my nomination to become Champion of the Taiga." She is only half of this Forest, however, and the way she glances down the trail again says that is looking for the other.
"You lead the way," Lilliana says as she smiles again, "I have a feeling you'll have better luck finding Lethia than I will."
but it's all in the past, love
it's all gone with the wind