I'd love you if I only knew how to // Any

[Sabra]

Sabra

I roll my bloodshot eyes skyward, the Voices crowding out my own thoughts. 

Coward, poison, hell-bent bitch. 

My ears are flat against my skull and still the words echo in them. Pearly tears stream down my face as I stare at the empty sky, wondering just exactly when my world became so fractured. 

I've tried. I've tried so many times to resurrect the pieces of my life, but they keep. Falling. Apart. 

They keep. 

Breaking. 

And it is so hard to fight for myself when They keep screaming that I'm not worthy. I was a Queen. I was a Mother. I was Loved and alive and had hope. There is none of that now. I am hollow, home to ghosts and nightmares. 

My tongue runs across my blood speckled lips, bubbles of air fighting through my lungs as the world spins around me. Around us. My wings lay like a ragged skirt on the grass, faded and soft. My feathers. My blood. My tears. I choke out a quiet, hiccuping laugh. 

You're heart is broken beyond repair

Tear it out 

It's hasn't done you any good, anyway

I can't look at her. My eyes stay on the sky, my one true love. It's blue as blue can be, and I reach for it with all my dwindling strength. Trance-like I rise. The motion, slow as it is, makes me gasp at the pain. But I get my feet under me. I sway where I stand, but it's okay. It's okay. It's got to be okay. My head swings drunkenly in her direction, a puppet with cut strings. 

Stiff legged steps carry me towards her, and then past her. I don't know where I'm going. But I'm tired of being here.

I wanna be Immortal, like a God in the sky


I wanna be a silk flower, like I'm never gonna die

Photo by Kareva Margarita

@[aletta]