Sabra
There's an awkwardness between us. Years of tension and strife and things both said and unsaid that weigh heavy on us now. I can see it in his eyes, the mismatched pair of them, even as I feel it in myself. Things I wish I could say, things I wish I could take back. And none of it is enough to repair the rift we've driven between ourselves.
Even though the rift still stands, still there is something to be said for time. It's dulled the ache, made it easier to bear. The very fact that we've managed to hold a civil conversation without devolving into snips and growls speaks volumes on its own. My smile is a little easier at this introspection. Looking past the draconic figure, I recognize the stallion within. He's a wounded creature not unlike myself, inside and out. I wonder if one day he too will tire of constant battle.
I dim at his mention of our sons, though I know it was I who brought them up first. My mouth tightens into a bleak line at the reminder of shared failings. "I miss them too," I admit, wilting a bit. From the beginning, those two deserved so much better than they got from the pair of us. Parents really only because we made them. I tried, especially in the beginning. My mind, however, found itself unequal to the trials my life had pelted me with and had rejected all semblance of kindness in its self destructive state. Had driven them away in fits of madness and spite to such a degree that I'm left doubting if they will ever speak to me again.
It is part of why I'm seeking shelter now. To regain myself. For all the bad blood between us, I am familiar with the dragon. I know him, and right now the danger I can predict seems a better option than the world I do not know. I don't believe he'll turn me away. I know he's considering it, but it seems I've gotten lucky with the timing of this meeting, and he is feeling nostalgic. That doesn't stop my heart from leaping against the lance when he says I am welcome.
Relief loosens the taut lines of my stance, releases the tightness of my brow. I nod in return, gratitude nudging cautiously at my mind. And for once I give in to it, putting my pride away to let my fragility show. One pace, another, and I am near enough to lift my face to his darkly scaled cheek and press a chaste kiss there.
"Thank you, Cas," the words are as quiet as breathing. I withdraw then, suddenly uncomfortable with the nearness, with the pressure of my heart thudding into the lance where it grazes him. My wings fidget again, settling and resettling. I am ready for this to be over, to be alone again until I reach my newfound destination. The mask of flat tranquility falls over my features again.
I wanna be Immortal, like a God in the sky
I wanna be a silk flower, like I'm never gonna die
Photo by Kareva Margarita
@[Castile]