"But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura
05-23-2024, 09:14 PM (This post was last modified: 05-23-2024, 09:18 PM by Embark.)
Nothing is as it once was.
When mother and father died, I found it was the perfect time to retreat into my safe space. The cave - one that mother had inhabited until her death - once had seemed comforting and familiar. When chaos broke out across the land, I did what my mother did - hide. She was an agoraphobic, that woman, barely stepping out into the sunlight, save for the occasional meal. Perhaps that's why I decided to tuck myself away for so long - it was in my blood.
Though, I always knew that wasn't the only thing that coursed through my veins. I was a child of the Wraith - the one who raped my mother, the one who terrorized these lands for years before I came to be. The one I never met, but whose red eyes haunted me - because I shared them with him. I heard his name in mother's nightmares before she died. I watched my father - the one who truly raised me - gently awaken her and then hold her. Well, perhaps, that's why I decided to go into hiding - if I bore the blood of a devil, it was only a matter of time before I became one myself.
There was another whose blood I shared, however. My sister - who in reality wasn't my sister at all - Deiti. I thought of her in my seclusion, I dreamed of her during the day, I talked to her at night. I had always wished to be more like her...brave, adventurous, cunning. All things I hoped to be, but failed miserably at. I looked back at our childhood fondly; our made up games, our midnight gossip, our longing to be anywhere but...there. Mother and father loved us, perhaps too much - they hovered. Only Deiti found the courage to leave though, while I stayed to care for mother, and then stayed even as she rotted because I knew nothing else.
Maybe that's why I found myself here, in the ruins and rubble of what once was. I had always struggled with change, where Deiti sought it out. The unnatural silence is all too familiar to me...I was used to the quiet, used to only my thoughts to keep me company. I can feel the pain that lingers here, the echoes of hurt that refuse to subside. I understand their agony, as I lived it for decades. How can you claim to be anyone when you've lost everyone?
"Deiti!" I scream suddenly, listening as her name reverberates off the rock formations. I'm not sure why I call for her; all I know is my heart aches and it has since we departed. My sister...she was the only one who truly understood me. "DEITI!" I scream again, this time through sobs.
I beg the wind to carry my call to her as I listen to my own torment - the only sound for miles.
Under the cover of a moonless night I left the Gates with newfound revelation. Perhaps my demons could be summoned to the darkness for good!
My lanky stride carries me quickly across the lands and I find myself in the very place I had nearly...drowned on air. I contemplate quietly of what had caused the sudden appearance of gills and why now they are gone. Weird.
There is a determination in my movement, and an unrest in my soul. The obsidian of my scaled form is indiscernible in the pitch black of the night as I move along a well beaten path. So, it is when I hear an eerie wail of my name I pause. Who would be seeking me out?
The creature within me shudders at the opportunity to twist my emotions in a knot again. Ugh not now!
I consider fleeing when again my name is shouted even louder and with more emotion. My reptilian eyes blink in confusion as I scan the area. Shadows of crumpled stones lay scattered about but to identify where the sound was sourced from was impossible in such scarce lighting.
Waiting for something else to happen, I remain frozen in place simply listening. I don't dare call out and bring attention to myself, not here, not now, not in the dark.
My ears swivel at the now silent air and will myself to gingerly step forward, simultaneously breaking a twig under my weight and sending a loud CRACK into the quiet...
D
eiti
A God's Creation | Carnage X Dynast
@Embark Just a cursed pony with demon-like tendencies in the dark trying to sneak away... xD
I cry for what feels like hours, until I no longer can.
Her name had echoed for miles, bouncing off the ruins and returning to me. Silence drew a curtain over my agony after a few moments, and I sat sniffling for awhile before finally deciding to take my leave. She wasn't here - perhaps she wasn't anywhere. I take in a deep breath through my nostrils and exhale through my mouth, as I had done so many times before in my moments of mental torment.
Night had fallen, the sun setting beneath the horizon in a dazzling show of color before blanketing the Ruins in midnight. I walk slowly, careful not to trip over any rocks or boulders. Maybe it was best to find another secluded cavern somewhere - being a hermit seemed much better than the alternative of trying to find someone who may not be around at all.
Suddenly, I hear a loud crack from nearby. My head turns quickly, ears darting forward. In the quiet of the Ruins, it is hard not to hear any misplaced sounds. I figure I have nothing to lose, turning and walking towards it. "Hello?" I question, eyebrow raising. "Is someone there?
The mare's obsidian scales sparkle with color in the pale moonlight. Her cerulean eyes, reptilian in nature, peer at me through the darkness. She looks older now - well-formed, beautiful, hauntingly so. I knew it was my sister, my best friend, the only family that was alive anymore.
"Deiti..." I whisper, not daring to move closer. Maybe it was a dream - a sadness-induced hallucination, but I still peer at her through tear-filled crimson eyes. I long to touch her (to be touched by her), to hug her like we had as children. Instead, I take a step back. "It's me, Embark..." I say quietly, not sure what she would do (or if this was even real to begin with).
I wince as I hear the snap of twig, freezing my movements and contemplated if I should just bolt off. But then there is the voice, soft, kind and a tad lost sounding. It causes me to remain still, my only movement is my ears swiveling about my head to catch the sound of steps approaching.
The creature within me lays coiled, ready to surface at a moment's notice and rip into the flesh that is approaching. I swallow hard, trying to repress the urges that instinctively flow within me.
Then my name is coming again from the stranger, and I turn to look at a ghostly being in the dim starlight. "Embark?" I repeat the name as if it not a name I think of on a daily basis. The name that haunts my every waking moment. My sweet and gentle buttermilk sister that I had stained red by ripping through her flesh.
I smile a toothy smile, revealing the dagger like teeth I still wore. It may have looked sinister in the silent darkness but there is a gentleness to my face as I stare at her. "Sister!" I turn to face her, taking a few steps towards her and closing the distance between us. I go to embrace her, intertwining my neck with hers. The warmth of her plush skin, the scent of her mane, it feels like home.
In that moment I forget about the creature begging to rip her open again. I forget about the blood dried on my face from my encounter early that evening. I forget about the monster that I have become. My heart was just a tad more full than it had been only a few hours ago.
I see her sharp teeth flash in the pale moonlight; I smell the faint metallic aroma that had become all too familiar, because she had once drawn blood from me. I watch her turn, her once tense demeanor melting as her gaze meets mine.
"Sister!" I hear her exclaim, and then she is right next to me, embracing me like she had all those years ago. My eyes well with tears - I can feel her soft iridescent scales against my skin, smell the scent of sea brine on her mane. She is not a mere hallucination - she is there, with me. I lean into her, sighing, willing the tears to go away. The embrace lasts quite awhile, before I finally pull away to look at her.
She is beautiful as ever, having grown into a magnificent mare. I smile gently at her. "My Gods, Deiti..." I say, sniffling. "...I've missed you so. How have you been? I'm sorry I've been away for so long..." My voice trails, more tears welling in my eyes as I look at her. Losing our parents had been hard enough, but never knowing what had become of your sibling, the one raised with you...that was a hell I knew all too well.
It had been a trying few decades at this point. Being immortal, time gets away from you a tad differently. But the last couple years, since my return to the mainland, have been especially hard.
She slips from my embrace, looking at me with tear filled eyes. Under the faint starlight her golden face glimmers against the raven black of the night. I smile, recognizing every fine line of her facial features from my many memories as she speaks.
It is in that moment though that the creature churns within me and I swallow hard as I back away. How have I been? It was a hard question to answer, truthfully. I did not wish to tell her of all the horrible things I've done and so I tell a half truth, “I've been better these last few days.” I say with a kindness. “I-I am actually on my way to the Mountain so that I can be better… So that I WILL be better,” my reptilian-like eyes shift towards the direction I had been headed.
With a heavy sadness I pull myself away but I plead for her to go to the place I had just left, “I must go, quickly befor…” I begin to explain but decide against it, “Meet me there!” My feminine face points in the direction of the Gates, “I won't be long I promise!”
I wait for affirmation before I turn and gallop off towards the Mountain…
Deiti
