[open] I need a reason to keep on living in the city

[Tantalize]

tantalize

I make excuses to stay away from home

I'm looking for an answer in my heart

I'm looking for a fresh start

I need a reason to keep on living in the city

Ever since her daughter had found her deep in the humid depths of the jungle, she had been unable to fall back into her half-life hermitage as she had before. When she closed her eyes at night all she could see was Bardot’s disappointment and the hurt red eyes of the son she had walked away from when Offspring had disappeared. These children... It had never been their fault, casualties in the fallout from her war with love. It hadn’t been Cersei’s fault for looking so much like Lion. Just as it hadn’t been Obscene’s fault that he had looked so much like his father. It had never hurt this bad before. The loneliness, the guilt, the grief. She had lived with it for so long that she had grown use to it but seeing her second-oldest had stirred something within the jaguar mare.

Had reminded her of the life outside of her quiet jungle.

Her heart still aches for the heat of the once Overseer, the fire that had once burned her clean. The stallion who had once lit Sylva on fire to save her. She knows he is gone for good, perhaps waiting for her in a life past this one, and while the jagged pieces of her broken heart still cut into her hands where she grips them tightly, she feels a stirring of restlessness somewhere beneath it all. A feeling she had forgotten after years of shutting herself off from the world.

Now the days don’t seem to blur all together anymore and she can’t tell if that’s a good or bad thing. The jaguar mare moves quietly through the thick vegetation, slinking easily over gnarled roots and snagging thorns. She moves like the cat whose spots speckle parts of her russet coat, a freckled ghost who prowls in the suffocating darkness. The restlessness is stronger today and for a moment she wonders what it might be like to step free from the jungle and see the sun in all its glory instead of snatching glimpses of it from where it falls through the thick canopy. What it might feel like to unfurl her wings and feel the breeze beneath her feathers again.

Her golden eyes look towards the trees where the volcano lays beyond and wonders what it might be like to leave. And then she remembers those red eyes of all those she had loved and her heart painfully flutters as she turns away. Maybe another day, she tells herself and turns to move further into the rainforest to disappear again.

Open to any!

[Kirsikka]

Kirsi found herself alone in the jungle today; her sister was a much more silent type and although the palomino-and-blue girl hadn’t ever bothered, she still missed her ever-present someone to talk to. But her twin had insisted on going on alone today for some reason, and so the normally chattering girl had found a parrot to talk to, instead. For a while, that was all very well, but when it started to get repetitive, she moved on to talk to herself and the trees.

”I wish papa was here,” she mutters to herself. It’s a change from wanting Kukka around, she figures, but not too much. But her father, when he didn’t take to wanderlust, hadn’t been himself since that day when he’d come home all bruised and battered. Somewhere out there, she has a half-brother and sister, but the twins whom had been planted in their father by some wicked god, had never bothered to find their elder siblings. ”Perhaps we’re too normal for them,” she tells an interested-looking red frog; but the creature croaks and bounces away. ”Hmm, not interested then.” she sighs, and moves farther along the trees and jungle vines. Mother had said a mare named Leliana had grown about half of this forest, and Kirsikka always smiled a little with the idea of a plant magician with a name that was so similar to liana. She had yet to meet her, however.

Kirsi picks up her step, determined to make something of her day that did not involve whining about being alone. She was an adult now, and she could have fun outside hanging with her family! She bucks and jumps over more colorful frogs, then laughs, the sound tinkling through the forest when they seem appalled by her taunting little jumps. ”Yes, I am appalling,” she giggles and then trots on in a much better mood. Now, what else is there to do today?

Her head bounces left and right until she finds a spotted mare, about to turn to the deeper forest. Hey, a new friend! ”Hi there!” Smiling widely, Kirsi approaches her with a beaming face. She notices the wings - feathered ones, that will work in the dark unlike mother’s, she figures. She halts then, though; surely she should give the mare a change to speak first. How long had she been here, she wonders suddenly - she hadn’t seen the frogs, had she?



@Tantalize

[Tantalize]

tantalize

I make excuses to stay away from home

I'm looking for an answer in my heart

I'm looking for a fresh start

I need a reason to keep on living in the city

She had thought the laughter spilling through the dimly lit jungle was simply a figment of her imagination, a troubling symptom of languishing so long amongst fern and vine with only herself and the jungle creatures for company. She is in mid-step when she freezes, hearing a rather cheerful voice calling to her from the undergrowth. Slowly she places her hoof back to the forest floor and turns her russet head, sharp golden eyes catching the young palomino with the beaming grin on her face.

Had she once been like that when she was younger? Bright eyed and full of naivety and innocence? She thinks so but it had been such a long time ago that she can’t remember. Despite her age, she is still a beautiful creature and she quietly prowls over to the girl, curiosity glimmering in the depths of her golden eyes. The only true sign of her years can be seen up close where a soft gray creeped along her dark muzzle and the hollowness of her gaze that spoke of seeing far too much.

She had turned her daughter away despite the gentle push Bardot had tried to give her. She remembers the name of the territory she had claimed as her own, a vaguely familiar name that she had heard before. She realizes that even if she was to leave this jungle, the world had moved on without her and she was lost in this new age. But perhaps this one might be able to help her. If she did decide to step out of this jungle that is, she was still wavering on such a monumental task. “Hello.” She finally manages in a surprisingly pleasant voice despite the rough raspiness of a throat not use to talking. Her dark wings still pressed tightly to her sides, she hesitates, then presses on despite her uncertainty. Pushing her emotions and feelings deeper, a skill that comes back to her as easily as one might recall riding a bike, she smoothes her expression into something a little more regal. “Tell me, child, of the world outside of the jungle.” A pause. “Please.” She adds as an afterthought, still shaking off the rust as she slowly begins to come back alive.

@Kirsikka

[Kirsikka]

Kirsi is a carefree child in that moment, free from the nightmares that will come later - she will follow her mother, like her twin, not to another land but to a common land - but also free from the more common burdens of life, like love, or lack thereof; like loss and sickness. Up until then she has had what some would call a perfect life but she finds it somewhat lacking. Perhaps it’s just because she hasn’t met many others outside her family. Even the current king and queen are related to her to some degree.

But this mare moves with cat-like steps and a purpose behind her eyes, even though she is a total stranger. She is one of the many who claim a home in Tephra but rarely come out to play. She is one with history; similar to auntie Solace and Kag. Similar to her own mother, sometimes, and sometimes not (Kirsi has only known her as she is now, complete with the memory loss, but sometimes after a night’s sleep with auntie Kag she remembers stuff, temporarily).

But she has forgotten, too, in a way it seems. The blue-marked girl smiles a little, then shrugs. ”I’m not so well-travelled,” she starts, and figures that perhaps she should be, at her age. ”What would you like to hear about? There was the sun disappearing not too long ago, but it’s back now. Haven’t seen monsters since.” she offers, for starters. In fact it is most everything she knows. Well, that, and that Tephra is not at war with any other kingdom.

@Tantalize