"But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura
It has been awhile since everything happened, it has been awhile since the pale mare felt the company of another, what was so bad about her that others would act like they want something to do with her but then they leave with out so much of a goodbye or a reason why they left her. These thoughts were always buzzing and stinging Tabithi's brain, plaguing her with those negative thoughts. A mare her age is at the prime of her life and she should be enjoying it, she should have a child by her side but losing her first one was a devastation to the mare making her think that she was just a bad mother who could not care for her own unborn child in the womb. She felt like a murderer, she felt as if she kill her baby while it was in her. So that experience scared her away from having children. Now she is here in the Field of Beqanna, she doesn't know how she happened across this place probably when she was mulling in self pity and her overwhelming thoughts making her unaware of her surroundings. The mare with the glowing yellow eyes looked down at the browning grass at her hooves and tears of sorrow brimmed her eyes.
She doesn't know why she is plagued with these thoughts all she knows is that they were a burden to her life, she couldn't enjoy quiet time to herself without the negative thoughts making her angry or burst into tears. Will she ever find someone to love her for the way she is not just some messed up mare who cries a lot and has petrifying nightmares that make her scream with agony.
10-25-2015, 07:54 PM (This post was last modified: 10-25-2015, 07:58 PM by Fennick.)
Again, Fennick was out in the cold. It was a long walk, down the winding mountain trail to the Field. But, it was an easy enough path, and Fennick liked the stillness of the trees and the perfection of freshly fallen snow. In the winter, time its self seemed to slow down. The big stallion took the hint and did so as well. The days were short, but the nights were long, and Fennick let the world tick by in small, measurable moments, savoring each of them.
His first few forays into the Field had felt like the first parlay in a long, drawn out war. He had done it with a sense of duty, a sense of necessity, but more than a little dread and trepidation. That feeling had long since subsided. Fennick had learned that conversation wasn’t so hard as long as they talked about his home. There was much and more to say about the Valley. It was an easy sell, even if the large, shy stallion was a poor salesmen.
It was strange, feeling at peace with yourself and the world. Fennick wouldn’t have thought it was possible, if it hadn’t already happened, if the warm glow of satisfaction wasn’t proof enough. He was still contemplating life, and the unexpected joys of it, when a girl caught his eye. Or rather, her stripes did. Fennick tilted his head with interest. She reminded him of his king, Demian. The Valley king had jaguar spots, rather than tiger stripes, but still, perhaps big cats should stick together.
Fennick pulled his wings up around his neck like a cloak and made his way over to her. However, when he was close enough to speak, Fennick noticed there were tears in her eyes. The stallion checked a little, suddenly wondering if his presence would only make it worse. But, he was here now, and he wasn’t going be felled by the sight of a few tears. He smiled softly. “Uhh, miss? Fennick, while determined to try his best, was not accustomed to diffusing feelings. He was not someone people came to to talk it out. He was a good listener, but the advice he dispensed tended to be terrible.
“Are you all right? I don’t want to intrude.” He was very aware she might just tell him to get the hell away from her. He tried to brace for it while attempting to look unintimidated.
The thoughts quieted for the first time in a long while and it made the mares head snap up and her white and grey ears swivel at the silence, then she caught the faintest sound of muffled hoof falls in the snow. She looked over towards the sound to find a winged equine coming to her. He spoke catching more of her attention her glowing yellow eyes take him in, he asked if she was alright and it almost broke her down again. No she was certainly not alright she was tormented by her evil thoughts. But she put on a soft smile "Yes, I am quiet alright. Memories get to you sometimes" she said in a tone that hinted she was wise beyond her years but in all reality she was just a wild child so to speak ready to explore and experiance new things as long as she wasn't alone while she did these new things.
"Hello, I am Tabithi" she said bowing her head slightly as she turned to face him fully to put her full attention on him. The cold wind blew her long grey and white mane around her face, she looked like a ghost with her pale coat and her haunting yellow eyes that were glowing slightly in the murky misty surroundings. "What brings you to the Field?" asked slightly her ears tipped forwards in curiosity. "I have never seen a winged horse before. What does it feel like to fly?" She said walking gracefully closer towards him her head tipped in the slightest
Fennick smiled softly and nodded. Memories did have a way of resurfacing at odd times. Though, the ones that caught up with him were mundane flashes of an average childhood. They were more boring than heartbreaking. He hadn’t been the most popular child, but he was among the largest, so all but the most determined bullies left him well enough alone. He’d fallen down a lot, as he got used to his long, long legs, but that was about the biggest trauma he could claim.
The stallion wasn’t quite sure he believed her, when the mare said she was alright. But, he recognized a change of subject when he heard one, and let it go. Saying the right thing at the right moment required a finesse that Fennick didn’t possess. It was better to say nothing at all. He nodded in response to her name.
“A pleasure, Tabithi. I’m Fennick.” And so he was. The wind blew fiercely around them, blowing his mane as it blew hers. The stallion pulled his wings forward, breaking some of the wind’s force so he could hear her over the howl. Fennick smiled a little lopsidedly at her question.
“Recruiting, in theory. Trying not to make an ass of myself in practice. Is it working?” Now that was the real trick, not making an ass of himself. It was accomplished once in a blue moon, and by saying that out loud he pretty much ensured this would not be one of those times. Another one of his lopsided smiles. Luckily, she changed the subject, and Fennick ruffled the feathers in question. He was absurdly proud of them, but not because they allowed him to fly. They had been a gift from Demian, and that meant more to Fennick than he would say out loud. It was an effort, to not make his devotion to the Valley king absurdly obvious. It would not do, for a supposedly intimidating Valley lord to fall all over himself in admiration.
“It’s all right. I’ll admit, I prefer to walk. They do, however, have their moments.” Like the time Demian had lit the whole bloody Valley on fire without giving any of the residents a heads up. In that moment, Fennick had flown around frantically, looking for the cause of the assault. In all fairness, that wasn’t exactly how it had happened. Flamevein and Eight had known what Demian was up to, and the king had only lit the border on fire. Still, it was enough to spur a man to action. The wind howled again, and Fennick wondered what anyone was doing out in his weather.
The pale ghost focused of the stallions smile which cause her to smile also, she tried to look the stallion over to occupy her thoughts from becoming offal again. She noted that he was a very attractive stallion with his majestic wings and the smile to make her heart melt. "It's a pleasure to meet you Finnick" She said her bell tone just barely a sound in the wind, but it dies down slowly to where the two can hear each other speak which she was grateful. She chuckled at the sight if him bringing his wings up to block the wind and giving her a cute little lop sided smile that made her whole body relax. Her grey pointed ears flicked to catch every word he said to her as he spoke about trying to recruit and not make an ass of himself, she giggled softly "Do not worry dear Finnick you are making something of yourself but no where near an ass" She said her glowing eyes twinkling slightly with affection and humor as she gives him a soft smile.
She walks a little closer to him to maybe steal some of his warmth, "Forgive me for coming close to you, it is just a little cold out" She said apologetically. She watched him ruffle his feathers when she spoke about them, he did look proud of them but not for the reason that she would of thought "I would love to have wings, Flying sounds wondrous." She said glancing up at the sky and wondering what it would be like to fly up there among the birds, she would feel free. The stallion seemed to be lost in thought but she changed her mind about that when he ask what she was doing out in the cold "Well honestly I don't know I was traveling when I came to this place to rest and maybe be on my way again. But even when it is winter this place is beautiful. I may stay." She said looking over the landscape as she spoke. Yeah, she might stay, make a home here.
Fennick had not gotten much wiser (mores the pity for his home), nor had he matured much as the years ticked by. He had, however, learned to laugh at himself. Everyone else had been laughing at him for his whole life, is it was about time he joined in. It gave him something to do, rather than stand stiffly and uncomfortably. Bad jokes and self deprecation, the tension diffusers of the truly socially stunted.
It worked wonders.
Luckily, Tabithi didn’t create a lot of tension. He didn’t feel pressure to be perfect, or to say the right things, it was a rare feeling, and he had another smile for her.
“You’re a generous host then, or else your expectations are too low. Both work in my favor.” This much was true. There were few greater gifts than the white lies we tell our friends and acquaintances to make them believe we don’t think them truly bizarre. It was called the social contract. Fennick was a big believer of it in theory, in practice he often failed to live up to it.
She moved a little closer to him and now Fennick really did feel like an ass for keeping her standing around chatting in the cold. He scooted so he was parallel with her and lifted the great black wings a little higher, better to block the cold.
“Don’t be sorry, everyone keeps telling me to make myself useful. Now if I fail the Valley’s högerhand I’ll have a promising career as a wind stop.” Perhaps, if he worked really hard, he would come to be as effective as a large boulder. If he was telling the truth, Fennick spent a great deal of time as a large boulder. His powers of cellular replication came at a price. He turned into stone when he slept. It was a little awkward, to say the least.
Fennick nodded slightly as she spoke about flying. It was a truly unique sensation. Before Fennick had his own wings, he would take the shape of a hawk, or whatever bird was flying overhead. At first the rush and dip of the wind made him sick, now it felt more natural.
“Who knows, maybe you’ll get to fly some day. I wasn’t born with wings, or with my other ability.” Nope, Fennick had been born a regular joe, and through a series of unexpected events came to possess a variety of skills he had no business wielding. He was contemplating the strangeness of life when she spoke of staying in Beqanna, and Fennick brightened.
“Well, if you stay in the Field you won’t get a moment’s peace. There are all sorts of strange men wandering around out here.” The big stallion grinned, knowing full well that he fit the description of a “strange man” and was, in fact, probably one of the strangest she was likely to encounter. Still, undeterred, he continued.
“If you like, I could show you my home.” Fennick couldn’t promise his home would be any less strange or any warmer than the Field. For starters, it was usually colder, being in the mountains. The residents were another matter. Yet, as unpredictable as they could be, they also had a way of growing on you.
Tabithi flicked her ears and sighed a cloud of vapor made a small halo over her ears then disappearing. She watched Finnick as he spoke again to get his voice warming her body. "I don't think low expections have anything to do with it. I just really enjoy your company." She said offering the stallion a warm smile as her yellow eyes met his dark eyes with some sort of affection in their golden depths.
"Finnick, You want to take me to your home?" She said her eyes wide and a small smile on her lips as her mane flowed in the wind like a pale and grey flag. Yeah, she was beautiful but she didn't think so. That is why she doesn't sound so proud like some of the other beautiful mares. She turned her head and looked over at the horizon as her thoughts turned slightly negative as they whispered that Finnick wouldn't love her because of her thoughts and how much she hates herself. Who would love someone like her?
"I would love to go Finnick" she said her voice soft and sweet like the warm springs breeze.
