"But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura
08-07-2018, 09:32 PM (This post was last modified: 08-07-2018, 09:33 PM by Breckin.)
The journey from the Field to Nerine was a long trek in general, but today especially moreso. Agonizingly long, even with all the time in the world left to mull over Leilan leaving her behind in the Forest. But she didn't want to think about it right now, it was all still too raw, and she was too worn down now. There was no hurry in her pace, no heart left in her actions, she begun the descent back to operating on a subconcious level, allowing her mind to drift into numb static once more. It was eerily the same scene that she had found herself in when she'd first stumbled into Beqanna a few years ago and like a compass pointing north, her limbs tracked the path home on their own.
They carried her beyond the Forest, through Taiga and Loess, and finally to skirting the outermost border of Hyaline along the coast, the crash of waves soothed her a degree, their sounds creating a perfect melody with the fuzzy white static that had already settled into her thoughts. If there were others nearby, she paid them no mind, because she simply didn't care right now.
Breckin must have been too caught up in the blistering storm of nothingness to notice the black coated woman nearby, nearly running into her, but catching her progression at the very last moment. Her mind snapped back to the present, and a suddenly flustered Breckin fumbles to find the right words to apologize for her negligent intrusion. "I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. It's been..." Whatever she'd been about to say dies upon her lips, as she notices the unmistakeable gold blazed filly at the mare's side. Her voice escapes her altogether then, unable to formulate any more cohesive words, too stunned to even remember to blink.
@[Briseis] not the best starter and I'm a bit sleepy lol
Even before becoming a mother, Briseis had spent much of her time constantly moving. Staying still caused anxiety to build inside her like a slow-brewing storm, and often this darkness exploded in the middle of night when she was trying to sleep. She has always had the idea that if she wore herself down enough, she would be too tired to dream. Of course, this rarely worked, but now it was a habit that was hard to break. And now with Chryseis, it wasn’t hard to stay pre-occupied. She was a bundle of energy the way most children were, and the little girl was more than happy to bound ahead of, and away from, her mother as they explored the expanse of Hyaline. Even though she was always begging to go somewhere else, she thankfully had a short enough attention span that she could often be distracted by something nearby.
The duo were on a journey on the shoreline today, although the black mare was keeping clear of the crashing waves. The sights and sounds of the beach brought back the fragmented memories that haunted her dreams; running until her lungs bled, the desperate fight to stay above the frigid waters, and finally succumbing to the exhaustion — and eventually, being spit onto the rocky shores of Beqanna. Thankfully, Chryseis was too engrossed in her search for a perfect seashell to be concerned with the water (which was a first), and Briseis found herself letting the continuous sounds of the sea to carry her away. It wasn’t often that she tried to piece together her memories; usually it only lead to extreme frustration. But every now and then, she couldn’t help but to let her mind wander.
Her thoughts are shattered when another mare nearly bumps into her. It is the strangers voice that startles her back to the present, her adrenaline immediately spiking as her slim legs go rigid. Before she even needs to call to her, Chryseis is promptly at her side. Not because she was afraid of the newcomer, but because she was intrigued by her. Briseis exhales a slow release of a breath that she hadn’t realized she was holding, regarding the spotted mare with a cautious friendliness. ”Oh, it’s okay. No harm done.” There is a guarded smile that lifts at the corner of her lips, and as she is preparing to try and awkwardly get herself through the small-talk conversation that she is so terrible at, she realizes that the mare has stopped short and is staring in a frozen manner at the little blue roan girl at her side.
Briseis follows her gaze to her daughter, and then back, a shadow of suspicion falling across her face. She was already so leery of strangers, and with no knowledge of who this mare is, she can only assume the worst. ”My name is Briseis, and this is my daughter, Chryseis.” Her black muzzle reaches down to brush the crest of the filly’s neck and Chryseis, completely naive to the tension building between the two mares, smiles brightly up at the newcomer. ”Hi! I like your spots.” Concise and to the point.
briseis. you’re ripped at every edge but you’re a masterpiece
She's unaware of how long she stares at the filly; could've been seconds, minutes, hours, days, but it had felt like an eternity. That single blaze of gold was all that she could focus on, unable to register anything else in that moment until the little girl's voice pierced her clouded thoughts. It was a compliment, and she knew she should probably say something in reciprocation. She'd only mildly registered the pair's names, but she could recount them all the same. Forcibly blinking, and physically shaking her head out of the consuming daze she'd found herself in, her dark eyes shift swiftly between mother and daughter, before stilling upon the blue roaned girl. "Thank you, little dove. I like your golden marking." The words had come easily to her, and it surprised Breckin how effortlessly she'd spoken to the filly. Motherhood had never been atop the list of her priorities, but the tenderness she felt in an instant towards a filly she'd only known for a minute surprised her. Another blink, and a soft smile follows, forgetting in a blind moment about the troubles she'd just left behind in the Forest.
Finding some ground, she corrects her somewhat splayed stance, looking back to Briseis at last. "I'm Breckin, lead diplomat of Nerine. I apologize for staring, it's just that your daughter reminds me of someone I know." She left it at that, while a fierce internal battle waged onward. Beqanna was not all that large, and she'd travelled the far corners seeing many differing horses in her journeys, though none other than Leilan proudly displayed a metallic gold, or at least, none that she'd encountered anyway.
Did she really want to know if he'd sired the child she now looked at? A part of her largely screamed in dissent, arguing that the brief past would best be left in the past. Another part argued furtively to outright uncover the truth, claiming that at least she could finally put to rest the lingering doubt that lined the edges of her thoughts. Part of her still held on to the slim hope that he had only spoken in the heat of the moment, but deep down she knew that he'd been thinking about things for quite some time. There was no other explanation for how deliberately and swiftly he had reprimanded her.
Whatever they had had was dead and gone. So what was the harm in knowing if the girl was his or not. Maybe the truth would bring her some type of reconciliation for the future of hers that could have been, but would never be.
When she introduces herself as a diplomat of Nerine, the black mare eases just slightly. She is still unfamiliar with the other lands in Beqanna, but she knows they are at least allied with them. It was a slim chance she was here to kidnap the daughter of a mere resident. Still, the spotted mare cannot completely shake away the way she looks at the roan filly, and Briseis is keen to notice. ”Are you here on business, then? Perhaps I could fetch Ilma?” There is a tilt of her head, and a pointed way in which she looks at her. The mare was here for something, she had to be, but it was unclear to her why the sight of her daughter had caused such a reaction.
Chryseis, mean while, is still staring jovially up at the newcomer, occasionally swishing her short tail. Her face beams at the compliment, and immediately she straightens proudly, like a peacock displaying his feathers. ”Thank you! It’s gold, just like the hair on my dad. My coat is kind of colored like him too. He also taught me to swim, because my mom wouldn’t. She said it was dangerous, but she says everything is dangerous.” Recognizing that her daughter was unlikely to stop talking anytime soon, she touches her muzzle against her withers, a silent request to quiet down. Chryseis obeys somewhat reluctantly, feeling bad that the spotted mare has to talk to her boring mom when her conversations were clearly more interesting.
Given the information in Chryseis’ speech, she is pretty sure it answers Breckin’s question. But the way that it is asked, causes her to pause, seeming to realize she needed to choose her next words carefully. There was a weight to the question, something that seemed to be a heavy burden resting on the stranger’s mind - and heart. ”Yes,” she begins slowly, not really sure how to best proceed with the rest of it. She didn’t know the situation, and she wasn’t sure if the truth was a good thing or a bad thing. ”I know him. We are simply...aquaintences, I suppose you could say.” Her gaze shifts down to the roan, gold-blazed filly, and then back to the leopard mare. Did she really need to say it?
”Leilan is my dad’s name! But I don’t call him Leilan, I just call him dad.” Leave it to the child to say what could have remained unspoken.
briseis. you’re ripped at every edge but you’re a masterpiece
08-25-2018, 03:30 PM (This post was last modified: 08-25-2018, 03:30 PM by Breckin.)
Breckin
the truth that you'll find will always be the truth you hide
With a small shake of her head, she looks back from the filly to mother with sad smiling eyes. ”I am not here on business, there’s no need to seek out Ilma. Though any other time I’d be happy to have her company. I am simply on my way back home from a field journey.” Her gaze breaks from Brisesis in favor of the hazy horizon, ”It didn’t really go as planned, so please forgive my dumbstruck nature today.”
The subtle rigidity of the dark mare hadn’t gone unnoticed. Breckin didn’t blame the young mother in the slightest. With so much turmoil festering in Sylva and even the lands beyond, it was hard not to be suspicious around strange individuals. Espcially a foreign woman who couldn’t seem to stop glancing at the beautiful gold kissed filly.
Before she can say more on the subject however, little Chryseis is quick to share more information about her gold blaze. Even though certain pieces are still settling into place in her mind, Breckin is well practiced enough to keep the warm smile that stretches her lips as the filly tells of her adventure in learning to swim. In spite of the soft smile, she can’t ignore the tight clenching at the pit of her stomach; she can only hope that her mask is sturdy today. “I think your mother is wise to be weary of Beqanna’s dangers. There are many out there. I’d listen carefully to her advice, if I were you.”
She watches quietly as Briseis delicately asks Chryseis to quiet down. It’s a simple gesture, but it’s admirable all the same, how a meager touch can cause such a reaction. What other meanings could a brief touch hold? In her heart she knew, her memories skipping back to when she’d tugged playfully at those golden locks, and the warmth of his lips on her ear. So much could be said in such a way with so little effort. But that day, had been different in so many ways. And with that, she forces her memory to cut out; she couldn’t afford to revisit the past right now.
Not as the ebony mare was gently answering her question, and certainly not as Chryseis boldly confirms her suspicions.
The leopard mare nods solemnly, closing her eyes momentarily. It was not as surprising as she had expected it to be. Where there was once a twisted not in her stomach, there is no longer; where there was once a throbbing dull ache in heart, there was no longer; where the tears spill freely in trails down her pale cheeks, they were no more. Just numbness—a simple defense mechanism for a splintered heart.
She would feel all of those things later, just not now. Not when a bright eyed girl so easily reminiscent of her father stood smiling nearby her. If Leilan could not be a part of her life immediately, then maybe, a small friendship between his daughter and daughter’s mother could blossom in the absence of his presence. It wouldn’t fill the hole, but maybe it would smooth the jagged edges of it.
A pink colored flower swayed lazily in the sea breeze, and with little effort, Breckin reaches with her telekinetic whims to pluck it from its stem, bringing it to lay upon the sand near the blue roan girl. Her dark eyes look from Chryseis to Briseis, “I could put it in your mane if you’d like, with your mother’s blessing?”
There was no need to talk about the gold adorned stallion anymore; she was not entirely sure how much longer she could, even if she wanted to. The tiredness is unmistakeable in her eyes as she smile softly at Briseis again—nothing more than a simple thank you.
your world is still lacking of me, how do you love?
