"But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura
Okay, so welcomed is a bit of a stretch. Tolerated, and barely that, but it was more than I deserved back then. Funny how you forget shit like that after a few years, huh? Still. The offer stands. With a bit of a wry grin, I shrug an dnod just a little, just enough to let her know I caught that.
Roma lowers her head to Kali’s level, and puts on an extra serious face, and tries her hand at convincing Kali to behave. “Can you promise me that you won’t go back out on the ocean water like that?” All straight faced and everything. And Kali just tilts her head and scrunches up her face again, giving it some serious thought before shaking her head nope. Ha. Sassy little thing. I should probably be trying to talk her into listening, but I mean. She got that from me. And from her mom, really. How can I squash it when it’s so damn adorable.
At least she’s being honest now.
Roma starts to spin a tale of a friend of hers who was eaten by a great big fish while playing in the ocean, and for maybe a half a minute, Kali’s eyes go all wide with fascination and she maybe even buys it. She even bites her lip and starts to droop a little like she’s about to give in. But then she narrows her pretty brown eyes and purses her lips, and huffs out an indignant breath.
“You, Miss Roma, are telling a not-truth, aren’t you? That is very sneaky of you. And I’m terribly conflicted, because I sneaky is delightful, but sneaky is much better when it’s being snuck at somebody else. I think you’re telling stories, and I don’t believe you. Though that was a pretty cool story, at least. ‘Sides, I can so stomp a fish. I’m maybe pretty little yet, but I got a mean stomp, I bet. No yucky ol’ fish is gonna eat me up.”
Oh holy shit, look at that, my girl’s got attitude. Ohhh you tell that fish, baby. Punch him on his big dumb nose. Knock him flat on his ass. And then you do that to boys who come sniffing around you in a couple of years too. I should have a talk about being safe. We will. We’ll have a good long talk later. But for just a moment, I indulge in a proud papa grin. “Damn straight, you tell that fish who’s boss, kid. Oh but also yes, no sneaking off without letting us know where you’re going, little miss. You’re still very small, and there are much bigger things out there than itty bitty Kali hooves.”
Kali, naturally, completely avoids the topic by getting distracted. “But I’m your new best friend, right? That part wasn’t telling stories? ‘Cause I like that, right now I have my family and a couple of boys who are my friends, a shiny scaley boy who’s all sunshine and fire in his skin, who lives up on a mountain and gets to play on a big, pretty lake! And also Uncle Roo, who lives in a big, big forest with big, big trees and a pretty name that sounds kinda like tigers. Ohhh and also a little girl, the friend I--well, um, yes, I made a couple of friends, but I don’t have a best friend. Except well kind of my big brother Khari, but do brothers count as best friends? If they do, then yes, him, for sure. He has pretty wings and cuddles the best and also we go exploring together and have so much fun. But maybe I could have two best friends?”
Mmhmm. Distract with the adorable chatter, redirect, and hope they forget the original topic. Kid learns fast, doesn’t she? Didn’t even know I was teaching her, but here we are.
“We’re still gonna have that talk later, kiddo.”
“Aww, damn.”
I snort, and meet Roma’s gaze. “Don’t worry, your honor’s safe enough with me. Give me a minute.” Kali launches into a list of her favorite things, as requested, while I rearrange my shape into something a little more conducive to carrying someone across the water. Pull some iron out of the ground to slide under her hooves and lift her up, settling her into the newly hollowed-out shape of my back. I redistribute the iron that is as close to flesh as I’ve got to fit her body and give her a nice stable hold, mold myself around her some until she’s comfortable, because solid iron isn’t exactly the coziest thing to nestle into. And then we’re off.
“We’ll go nice and easy, at least ‘til you’re used to it, okay?” I’ve had a bit of practice carting around some of my kids like this, so I can keep her nice and steady at an easy pace, even if Kali sighs and trudges sloooowly beside me instead of leaping and bounding and rolicking across the waves. Then she remembers her list, and perks right up. Just like that, she’s chattering happily and prancing along beside us for the rest of the trip.
“Um, well, I love my big brother Khari, and all my family. They’re real nice, and lots of fun to play with. I love ‘sploring, especially new places, or especially with my Daddy or my Khari or both. He’s real good at finding fun places on Ischia though, and he loves to share them with me. It’s the best. Oh and I like making new friends, and Daddy helps me not be scared or shy. Also Daddy’s part of my favorites, ‘cause he’s the bestest daddy. Or at least the bestest daddy I’ve ever heard of. Ohhh I love rainbowy birdies, and I love sunshine, and flowers that smell like rain and growing things and prettiness, and oh I also love the water, that’s maybe my very favorite thing that isn’t my family. Except it kind of is, ‘cause so many of us can play on it like this! What are your favorite things, Miss Roma?”
How I managed to not crack a smile as she very easily told me no…well I am not really sure. I guess the same way my parents managed to not laugh at me when they were trying to get me to do something that they didn’t want me too and some pieces of their attitudes made an appearance. I see that I almost have her, almost, except, then…well I see the light change in her eyes. Her eyes narrowing slightly and I manage again…some how to not laugh at her.
“You, Miss Roma, are telling a not-truth, aren’t you? That is very sneaky of you. And I’m terribly conflicted, because I sneaky is delightful, but sneaky is much better when it’s being snuck at somebody else. I think you’re telling stories, and I don’t believe you. Though that was a pretty cool story, at least. ‘Sides, I can so stomp a fish. I’m maybe pretty little yet, but I got a mean stomp, I bet. No yucky ol’ fish is gonna eat me up.”
Once she was done though…I laughed. I laughed for a long moment and when I looked at her again I nudged her lightly, my teeth finding small scratchy spots along her back. “You’re right, Little Miss. I was telling a story, but you caught me. Too smart for your own good and too good at sneaking.” Wasn’t she adorable? And holy shit, if Kerberos wasn’t doing a damn fine job at raising her. He reminded me a bit of the way my parents taught us and I take a long look at him before Kali distracts me again.
“You’re right. That part was real, not story. You know what cool things best friends do besides cuddles and snuggles and adventures?” I pause a bit for emphasis and duck my head real close to hers, my lips close to her ears but my eyes on her dad. “Best friends tell really good sneaky not-truth stories to your daddy.” I grin. “I bet we can make up the best stories, the two of us.” I say, my eyes sliding towards her in a conspiratorial grin.
Kerberos’s iron is sliding under my feet. I wobble a bit but too easily settle onto his back. I can’t but help the snort that slides out and I grunt a bit too just because this is the oddest thing I have ever encountered or done. Okay, maybe not true, but it’s the most I got right now. Kali distracts me again and I let her, with the list of all her favorite things. When she asks me mine I take a moment to think about it.
“Kali. Kerberos. My family.” A small pause as remembering threatens to eat me up inside a bit. I don’t let it, letting the tiny imp girl next to me be what steadies me. “My brother.” I rest my head on some part of Kerberos, I don’t even know what part it is anymore to be honest, but I rest my head so I can tilt it just so and look at her. “Did I say Kali? Because I think she is my absolute favorite.” Distract and redirect.
Oh Miss Roma was her very best new friend. New friend, because Khari was of course her very best friend, and also Kylie and Baddie were right up there because sister and brother. But Miss Roma, who was as blue as the sky and all trimmed in black, with such pretty gold eyes, and such sneaky smiles, and such wonderful ideas! “Ohhhh that sounds like so much fun, Miss Roma!” she whispered, her dark brown eyes going wide at the thought of telling sneaky not-truth stories to her daddy. “I bet we could!” Once they got home to Ischia, maybe she and Miss Roma could go exploring and plan a story or three to tell Daddy. Oooh, maybe they could tell Khari stories, too!
Daddy scooped up pretty Miss Roma and settled her on his back, cuddling around her so she’d be nice and cozy and safe, just like he did with Kali sometimes when they went on adventures and she got toooo too tired. Kali smiled up at her new friend and nodded, and wiggled excitedly. “Oh, that is a most excellent list! I think you should be on mine too, for sure. There’s lots on our lists that’s the same, huh? My brother’s on mine, just like yours is on yours.
“And of course Daddy’s on both of ours, because he’s the bestest daddy. Well that’s why he’s on mine. He’s not your daddy, so probably that’s not why he’s on yours. I like the way he grins all sassy-like sometimes, and the way he cuddles, and how he takes me on lots of adventures. Do you go on lots of adventures too? You could come with on ours! We have really good ones, right, Daddy?”
Her daddy, of course, just grinned down at her. “Sure do, baby girl. The best adventures.”
He lowered his head to lip at her scruffy little mane, and Kali hopped and rubbed up against his leg like a cuddly cat. “You’re my best friend too, Daddy. Don’t feel left out, okay? I’ll still wanna cuddle you and go exploring with you and play chase on the waves with you, even if I have more best friends too. I promise promise. So don’t be sad, alright?”
The love in his smile and his pretty grey eyes made her insides all cozy happy warm. “Of course not, angel eyes. I’m always gonna be happy that you’ve got lots of people who love you, even it it means sharing you. I’ll still make sure to sneak a little cuddling with Daddy time into your busy schedule. Sound good?” She beamed up at him and nodded, and he stopped long enough to pull her into a quick snuggle. “Good. Now, let’s get on home, shall we?”
“Hold on tight, Miss Roma!” Kali said with a sneaky grin, and then scampered off across the waves, with her daddy in at least a little bit careful pursuit. And she’d gotten a whole lot better, too! She wasn’t even fall over tired by the time they made it to shore. Definitely hungry, though. “Daddy, I gotta go find Mommy, my belly’s rrrrumbly!” And before her daddy could even finish depositing his most wonderful and delightful passenger down on Ischia sand, Kali dashed off to do just that. “I’ll be back lickety split, okay?” she called over her shoulder to her new best friend. “Don’t forget me while I’m gone!”
The run across the water was weird, but amazing at the same time. Some how I managed to stay on his back and not end up in the water, but watching little Kali go flying, water spraying out from under her hooves as she ran, well, that was just adorable. Don’t forget her indeed. I smiled a bit and settled herself back on her legs when Kerberos deposited her back on the ground. “Thanks. That was weird, but better than getting wet.” Flashing another grin at him as I turned to face him after looking into where Little Miss had went running.
“She’s adorable, Kerberos. You’re doing a damn fine job.” I say it, because he needs to hear it and I needed to say it. Especially after the look that I knew he caught earlier. “And I’m sorry for that…earlier. It wasn’t fair.” Well, at least Mom had kept me from being too much of an asshole like Father could be sometimes. Remembering hurt less, even if it did make my heart ache like crazy.
I sighed softly, turning to look back in the direction that she had went. “She’s a lucky little girl.” Granted I didn’t know her mom, but I knew with just Kerberos that she was going to be an amazing little girl, and an even better adult. She wouldn’t ever know the shit that he had went through to make him the way he had been.
“Kerb..?” I can’t quite look at his face, so I start to walk slowly along the beach, my eyes looking out over the jungle. I don’t see it, an army of butterflies having taken up arms in my stomach. “You haven’t seen any of them have you?” I hope he says yes, even as I dread him saying no.
The silence almost kills me, the small pause where I almost immediately shake my head. “Never mind. I don’t want to know. This way I can pretend that they are still out there somewhere.” I sighed a bit, turning back to him with a small smile. “I promise I won’t let her get hurt on our adventures and our stories won’t alllll be made up.” That smile is a little more real, a little less pain.
Cute little imp. I watch her scamper off to go find her momma and sneak a little cuddle and a snack. “Thanks. That means...it means a lot, Roma.” I say softly, lacking my usual smug smirk because the compliment was too genuine. And meant too much coming from someone who’d been raised in such a close family. I turn to look at Roma, shrugging away her apology. “Nah. It was fair enough. I was a dumbass kid, and you and yours had to put up with a lot of my shit. I didn’t…I don’t know, I didn’t know any better, I guess.” I look in the direction Kali ran off, sighing. “And then there was Ty. I learned what family could be. You guys showed me. And when I saw the twins for the first time, when I looked at those little faces that were so much like mine, I thought maybe...just maybe, I could have something like that. If I…”
If I was better. If I was the kind of man who actually gave a shit about them, and did my best to guide them to be better than I’d been. Better than I was. Better than what I’d come from. I shrug, meeting those golden eyes of hers again. “I don’t know. I think I’m the lucky one. I’ve got some pretty great kids. A gorgeous home. And now and again, I get a surprise visit from an old friend.” Ah, and there’s a bit of my old grin back.
Doesn’t last long, though. The hesitant tone in her voice when she says my name, the way she can’t quite meet my eyes, the way she’s gotta move because standing still is too hard. “You haven’t seen any of them, have you?” she asks, and my grin fades. I open my mouth to answer, and she shakes her head. “Nevermind. I don’t want to know. This way I can pretend that they are still out there somewhere.”
“Hey.” I step closer, bump her shoulder with my nose. “They’re still out there. You kidding? Have you met them? It’d take a hell of a lot more than the world devouring itself and spitting us all back out stripped of our power to finish off your family. They’re tough motherfuckers, the lot of them. I haven’t seen any of them since Ty dumped my ass, but I have no doubt they’re around, and probably just as worried about you as you are about them.”
I’d pull her into a hug, but--ah, fuck it. A hug it is. “We’ll find ‘em, okay? And ‘til we do and you decide you’re better off wherever they managed to set up camp, you’re welcome here. Plenty of room, lots of light, all the Kali you can handle.” I pull back to look at her, grinning. “I know you’ll take good care of her on your adventures, and I look forward to all the sneaky not-true and sneakier true stories.”
The tiny bit of that old grin I remember makes me smile in response, and turn my head with a roll of my eyes. I look out at the jungle, at the bright green jungle color that reminds me so much of Papa. I knew he was here, he was so solid, strong, everlasting even when he had been asleep in the Jungle before all this had happened. And then Gran had come along and he had prided himself on sticking with her as she burned. But that was all so long ago, so so so long ago. That was before all of us, before our family melded and merged and became so much bigger.
I sigh, softly, his touch on my shoulder making me turn back around to face him. I tried to keep the earnest expression from my face. I tried to keep from believing him too much, but I wanted to believe what he was saying was truth. So I just smile a bit and nod.
His hug catches me a bit off balance but his warmth feels nice and so I lean into his touch. I smile a bit, stretching my chin out so it rests along his back. I squeeze him tight, just a moment before he releases me. I tilt my head a bit at the loss of his touch and blink the moment away before I can dwell on it too much.
I smile and laugh. “I can’t wait either.” I started to walk again, this time just quietly taking in the sights. I look over his back towards where the water was, where the ocean stretched out behind him until it hit land again on the mainland. “Smart move living on the island.” My mind switching to every defensive thing Father had ever taught me. “Hard to get to without someone seeing you. Father would have agreed with your decision.” Hell, he probably would have been living out here himself.
“Alright Kerb. Show me your home.” I say after a moment. If maybe my shoulder brushed against his now and then, I told myself it was because he was familiar in an unfamiliar place.
I half expected her to glare and duck out of the hug, so I’m pleasantly surprised when she relaxes against me and actually hugs me back. Ah hell, it’s been...too damn long since anyone’s done that, or at least anyone but one of my kids. And they’re biased, even if they’re right that I’m fantastic and extremely huggable, solid iron or no. Hell, almost forgot what it was like. She came from a solid line of huggers, though, her dad notwithstanding. And even he’d come around to the idea, though sure as fuck not with me. I can’t quite help the smirk on my face at the thought, but lucky for me my face is out of sight when it happens.
“The island wasn’t my idea, not at first, but that was one of the reasons I wanted to stay, yeah. The kids and I can all walk across it, but there’s only a few hours a day when the tide’s low enough for your average miscreant to show up and make trouble. And if they’re not careful, they can get stuck here for hours and hours.” My grin’s just a little sharp-edged, just a little toothy. “Plenty of time to catch their scent, if we’re keeping up on our rounds. And why wouldn’t we, when it’s such a nice walk around the island? Sea air, waves lapping at our feet, sun shining down on us. Makes the work a hell of a lot less like work, yeah?”
I tilt my head a bit, eying the water. “Of course, there’s more and more magic coming back every day. There’s always a chance. But we aren’t entirely defenseless. After all, there’s me.” I puff up my chest, all smug smirk and aren’t-I-fabulous posturing, but maybe a teeeny bit of amusement sneaks into my eyes. I mean, I’m not wrong. I can take on a lot of what this world has to throw at a person. Not all of it, of course. I haven’t forgotten the iron corpse of my grandfather that stood in Silver Cove until there was no Silver Cove, a dragon eye carved into his shoulder as a reminder that even the ironborn were fallible. But it took...well, her grandmother’s own special brand of magic-not-magic to rend his soul from his body and leave the Cove without his leadership.
“And there’s a dead sexy dragon floating about somewhere who’s at least probably got our back unless he’s still a little put out with me over some tiiiiny grudge he might be holding, long story.” Not so long, really, but sometimes it’s more fun to leave things up to people’s clever imaginations, yeah? I grin and nod forward and start walking. Might as well start the tour as I talk, right? After all, talking’s my specialty. Well. One of many.
“My dad actually showed up and took over, the fucker, and I moved the lot of us to this gorgeous lake up in the mountains for a bit. Almost as defensible, what with surrounded by all giant fucking rocks, right? Still had water for the kids to race across, clear all the way through to the bottom even in the deepest parts. We still go to visit sometimes, but dear old dad I guess got bored once there was no one to lord his victory over but the one guy who’d thrown in with him. Or something, who even knows with him? When I saw it was clear and just waiting for us to come home, well. How could I resist? Ea, the woman who was in charge before, I think she wanted a break from the drama, you know? So she handed things over to me and my buddy Reilly, the one Kali calls her papa? He’s got a thing for her mom, and he’s been around since before the twins were even born, basically her second dad.”
He’s a good man, Reilly. A good role model for the kids, and okay so I maybe secretly still hope he and Lacey will get together. She deserves some happy, and so does he. And as delicious and utterly fuckable as Lacey is, I know myself well enough to know I’m not the type to make her happy. Just to break things more the way I do every time I try. The last thing I want is to hurt her more than I already have.
“Anyhow. Welcome to Ischia. This is the main island, and mostly it’s just me and mine living here right now. Ea and her family, including sexy dragon man, seem to have settled on one of the smaller islands, and we mostly leave them to themselves unless they want to come out and play, yeah? The water’s gorgeous, perfect for a swim. Or a stroll, if you’ve got the right feet for it. Or a handy chariot like yours truly to carry you. You know, either way. It’s even prettier at night, believe it or not. The water does this cool glowing thing, and lights up when you step on it. I don’t know if it’s some weird kind of magic that’s just the island’s or what, but it’s cool as fuck and you have to see it. Inland we’ve got a fair few freshwater springs, excellent for a nice soak, a drink. It gets a bit hilly toward the center, some lovely mountainy bits with some shallow caves that are nice shelter when the rain gets to be a bit much. Jungle through and through though, and full of these rainbow birds the kids love. Not a whole lot by way of wildlife aside from that, at least not the big kind. Bugs and shit, you know, it’s a jungle after all. Where do you want to start?”
So we walk, and he talks. The corner of my lips tugging upwards into a small smile. If I remembered anything, it was that he could definitely talk. I nod in agreement with his toothy smile, remembering Father having a particular wonderful toothy smile of his own when he was feeling particularly violent. Usually, a touch of mom’s lips against his shoulder or a question from Tycho and I had been enough. But when it wasn’t…well, him and Dad went off to play for a while. That usually did the trick. They both came back with only small marks on them, likely Father had healed the rest, but both had that satisfied smirk on their faces and the ripple of fire in their eyes was back to a simmer.
I wondered briefly if Kerberos had that kind of relationship with Kali’s mom and Papa. But from the way that he talks about them, I am thinking not. Why does that make me even a tiny bit happy? A small frown mars my face but I wipe it away quickly when he turns back to look at me, that stupid happy smile on his face.
I watch him as he tells me about the night life on the island. How the island’s water do this pretty amazing thing. I nod in appreciation, certain that tonight I would make sure I caught the show before I went to sleep, even if that meant I was a little more grumpy tomorrow.
It takes me a moment of being lost in my thoughts about the island before I realized that he had stopped talking to me and had asked me a question. “What?” I blink, letting my mind catch up to his words and I laugh. “Sorry Kerberos. It’s habit.” And I wink, to let him know I’m only kind of teasing, from all the times before I used to ignore him as he talked. “You can show me it all, however you want, I just want to see it all.” And if maybe the way I said it made me blush a bit and those butterflies come back to life in a different way than before, well I didn’t so much as let it stop me.
Maybe if I turned my head to look at something away from him so he couldn’t see my face. I mean, it just had to be the remnants of breeding season right? With all the hormones in the air? That had to be why I was suddenly feeling warm, not because what I said had any sexual innuendo at all right?
Right.
When I turn back to him, it’s without a hint of any awkwardness, “Right. So lead on fearless leader.” I grin at him.
Whoops. She’s got that glazed look on her face people get when I’m talking too much and their minds start to wander. I smirk and wait for her to notice the silence, laughing when she finally blinks and looks at me and asks, “What?” Yep, and there it goes, her eyes focusing back on me as she catches up and realizes I asked her a question. “Sorry, Kerberos. It’s habit.” And because I like the way she’s decided to use my whole name, and maybe a little bit because of that saucy little wink, I grin and shrug and keep on walking.
“No big deal, babe, you’re hardly the first to tune out my ramblings. Though I’m at least partway convinced Kali actually listens, which, be still my shiny metal heart. Mind, I’m sure there are times it’d be better if she were paying a little less attention, but you can’t have it both ways, can you?” Well. A smirk creeps onto my face. Some of us like it both ways, actually. I snort and nod inland. “Here, this way, we’ll--”
“Hey!” Ohhh, Kali’s cute when she’s grumpy. She stomps over and scrunches up her face, her dark brown angel eyes narrowing as she huffs out a breath and glares at me. “Did you start the tour without me? Daddy! I said I’d be right back! Lickety split, I said, didn’t I? Didn’t I, Miss Roma? You didn’t tell her about the glowy water already, did you?” She looks between us, and then her lips purse and she stomps again. “You did! Daddyyyy, you were s’posta wait! You’re a bad waiter.”
I grin and wink at her. “Damn right, angel eyes. Know what, though? I didn’t show her the glowy water. Maybe you can stay up and do that part, huh?”
Her eyes light up, all wide and eager. “Really? Up late late? You promise?”
“Promise. If you can stay up, you can show her the glowy water tonight.” And just like that, she’s chipper again, bouncing over to Roma and reaching up to bump the top of her nose against Roma’s chin. Tucking herself right up against Roma’s chest and snuggling, a happy little smile on her face. All’s right with the world, just like that. That’s my girl.
“I can, I can! I’ll stay up all night long, and we can splash in the water, and it’ll be such great fun! And then we can have a sleepover, and snuggle in the moonlight, okay? Doesn’t that sound like the best thing?”
Kali’s voice broke through the rambling of Kerberos and I give him an amused grin. “We might be in trouble.” I say, murmuring it softly before I turn my attention towards Kali and look properly admonished. “You did.” I say, nodding my head in agreement, not really sure if she heard me or not as she gives her dad a talking to. He takes it all in stride, that happy smile still curling his lips. I study him for a moment, having really never seen him wear it before. At least, not a real one.
It had always been that sassy smirk, that you knew meant something sexual or smartassed was going to fall from his lips. It dripped from him, the inability to really give a shit but trying so hard. At least trying so hard for Tycho. The Dads did what they could, guiding him in their own ways. And Grandda had guided him in that steady, quiet way of his. But, well Tycho hadn’t felt anything. No, that’s not right. What Tycho had felt for him hadn’t been up to what Kerberos had felt for Tycho. And so, my brother had called it quits.
And then I hadn’t seen him around anymore. Which had made me sad, some how I had come to regard him as a big brother too. I got used to his comments, his smirks, and that damn glint in his eyes. I got used to having him around and he had always been a part of the family.
Until he wasn’t anymore.
Kali rubbing against me brought me back to them. I smiled and nodded, not really sure as to what I might be agreeing with, but willing to go along with it. If it had to do with one of my favorite girls it had to be a good time. I rub my face against her, lipping the fluff that was her mane and smiling. “Absolutely, the bestest best time.”
I rub my face against her again and nudge her lightly. “Your Daddy was going to show me the fun things in-land. Will you show me your favorite things too?” I started to walk again, knowing they would follow, or I was following them. I wasn’t really sure what was going on. Because once one starting talking, they both chattered away until I wasn’t sure who I was listening too, but it made me smile as I listened to them and walked.
