Out with the golden we sew, and the lower past that crawls.
Now, to the doorway you run, to the girl that's not lost.
Now, to the doorway you run, to the girl that's not lost.
The time has passed me by with an ever growing sense of hopelessness and surrender. Each day as I wake from fitful sleep, the cold dread replaces its grasp on my innards. Nothing is going back to the way it was, nothing familiar is showing up in the scenery, or the air, or my mind, and nothing is helping me to return to the peace I once was proud of within myself.
I remember the little girl I used to be, standing under Kavi and showing stoicism and gravity. I remember the calmness, the coolness, the collectedness, and yet that memory is not enough to envoke the same characteristics within myself now. Now, I am a leaf - manipulated by the wind and crushed under foot, pretty to look at but as insubstantial as poorly held together dust.
I cannot continue like this, else I shall decompose entirely.
My finely shaped legs haul me from the thicket near the river as if the body they carried were dead, and not alive. Sluggish, forlorn. But my instincts kick in once I have completely exited my forested niche, and my small ears prick up at the soft sounds of conversation and running water. Soon, the nutmeg flecks in my eyes are flashing more energetically, thankful for the stimulus after such a long time spent hidden in the darkness.
Padding softly upstream, I listen more than look for an area where I can take a drink without being disturbed. My youth is evident in my figure, which, though womanly, is too fresh to be older than three years. Eventually I find a quiet spot and walk to the river's edge, bowing my refined red neck to take a drink. The coursing water is cool and refreshing, and I drink deep and long. I don't remember the last time I came out for water; too long, I'm thinking.
The water hits my stomach with each gulp, a strange sensation that speaks to how little I've been eating. If my sides have become thinner, I'm only noticing now; my ribs are just slightly defined, the beginnings of hunger showing on my overo frame. I'll fix that - I won't go into hiding again.
It is as I am about to turn and leave that I notice her - the bay mare standing some ways off, stone still and silent in the shallows of the river. Although I had been purposely avoiding company, the draw of the quiet woman is undeniable - the idea of a company as soft as mine more than tempting. I set a hoof down into the water and walk towards her.
"Hi," I say softly, stopping at a polite distance from the figure. "I'm Kagerus." I try out a smile, but my lips twitch and my confidence falters. I don't know what the hell I'm doing here, I don't know what the point of any of this is. Tears prickle my eyes but I push them back, my voice trembling with the next words out of my mouth. "I... I don't know what to say next."
I remember the little girl I used to be, standing under Kavi and showing stoicism and gravity. I remember the calmness, the coolness, the collectedness, and yet that memory is not enough to envoke the same characteristics within myself now. Now, I am a leaf - manipulated by the wind and crushed under foot, pretty to look at but as insubstantial as poorly held together dust.
I cannot continue like this, else I shall decompose entirely.
My finely shaped legs haul me from the thicket near the river as if the body they carried were dead, and not alive. Sluggish, forlorn. But my instincts kick in once I have completely exited my forested niche, and my small ears prick up at the soft sounds of conversation and running water. Soon, the nutmeg flecks in my eyes are flashing more energetically, thankful for the stimulus after such a long time spent hidden in the darkness.
Padding softly upstream, I listen more than look for an area where I can take a drink without being disturbed. My youth is evident in my figure, which, though womanly, is too fresh to be older than three years. Eventually I find a quiet spot and walk to the river's edge, bowing my refined red neck to take a drink. The coursing water is cool and refreshing, and I drink deep and long. I don't remember the last time I came out for water; too long, I'm thinking.
The water hits my stomach with each gulp, a strange sensation that speaks to how little I've been eating. If my sides have become thinner, I'm only noticing now; my ribs are just slightly defined, the beginnings of hunger showing on my overo frame. I'll fix that - I won't go into hiding again.
It is as I am about to turn and leave that I notice her - the bay mare standing some ways off, stone still and silent in the shallows of the river. Although I had been purposely avoiding company, the draw of the quiet woman is undeniable - the idea of a company as soft as mine more than tempting. I set a hoof down into the water and walk towards her.
"Hi," I say softly, stopping at a polite distance from the figure. "I'm Kagerus." I try out a smile, but my lips twitch and my confidence falters. I don't know what the hell I'm doing here, I don't know what the point of any of this is. Tears prickle my eyes but I push them back, my voice trembling with the next words out of my mouth. "I... I don't know what to say next."
Kagerus
sweet nothing
![[Image: kag]](https://78.media.tumblr.com/2e8039018ce4dff6112c167ec23e886a/tumblr_p72zjit7wC1s5a0qvo1_100.png)
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