[mature] things we never thought we could be, adna

[adna]

ADNA

I wish I could take the hands of time and turn them in reverse
I'd take back every long goodbye with venom in my words

She is foolish for thinking perhaps he was softening. She was foolish to think that he would break down his secrets for her and let her see the underside of his heart; that he would let her see.

But she was a fool and she had hoped—she had thought…

It doesn’t matter because he withdraws his touch and she feels the sharp sting of rejection before he has the chance to follow it up with what he says. It’s like a door getting slammed in her face, and it nearly knocks the wind out of her. Instead, she bites her lip and closes her eyes, just sitting there for a moment.

“Oh,” she finally says, and it is defeat in the single syllable. It is everything that crumbles in her chest solidified into the diamond that drops from her tongue—the final bomb that detonates and takes out the rest of her. She wants to pull away but finds that she doesn’t have the strength.

Maybe she’s finally too exhausted to move away.

Maybe she doesn’t want to have to look him in the eye—to see the pity that must be there.

“Nothing worth me knowing, right?” she asks and she tries to inject something like self-deprecating humor in the words but they fall flat and leaden from her mouth. She swallows and makes a noise like she is going to try and say something else instead, but nothing comes but a long and slow exhale.

She should have known better than thinking he’d want to share anything with her.

the only way to being found is getting lost at first
but all I find are more bridges to burn