06-18-2019, 03:50 PM
sometimes i wonder, will god ever forgive us for what we've done to each other?
then i look around and realize, god left this place a long time ago.
It is not that he feels the most at home here.
It’s just that the roar of the river speaks to the storm in his soul.
He chooses to linger here because it drowns out the noise in his head. There is nothing useful in it, nothing in it that tells him where to go or who to be. So, he chooses to go nowhere and be no one, immersed so completely in the sound of the river and the way its spray reaches greedy for his flesh. He watches it, imagines his own blood charging reckless through the network of his veins. He has considered submerging himself in the rapids more than once.
But the stars have fallen. They catch his eye through the shadows shifting as dawn gathers, puckered, along the sharp edge of the horizon. He turns his great head in their direction, skirts through the underbrush, until he delivers himself to her side.
For a moment, he merely studies her. There is no sense of wonder, there is no longer anything child-like about him. The years have dulled his senses and sharpened his edges and he looks at her without awe, just a thousand-yard stare. How vibrantly she glows in the half-dark and he shifts his weight and then his focus, too. He looks her in the face, his head tilted at an odd angle.
“Were you born this way or did the stars lean down to kiss you?” he asks without pretense. He cannot help the way his gaze flits back to the stars and lingers there, bathing in their glow.
