He loved that proud grin on his face as Defy beamed up at his momma. Such a good boy. Dovev would have to teach him to fight, a little at a time. Never too young to start learning. He definitely would, and it would help ensure Diz stayed safe as their boy got bigger. Stronger.
"Soon, love," she told him, brushing a kiss on his cheek with a soft nuzzle. "We'll find a safe place soon. I have to find the girls." Ah, right. The girls. His and Zor's babies. So fucking weird that he'd gone from having a single kid to suddenly having three. Only one boy though, the little rascal. Perfect little champ lookin' so damn much like his daddy but in a good way for once.
He nodded at her explanation, glancing away. She probably hadn't realized he'd run into Zor, that he'd already told Dov about them but that he didn't want Dizorien to know about him. Not really. Or at least to know that she wasn't Zoryn's girl, and he agreed with that. He wanted to see her though. He wanted to know his baby girl. He just couldn't be her daddy, was all. He could handle that probably. Maybe. It was for the best for her.
Both of their eyes seemed to fall when she mentioned how he was supposed to come back to see Diz. And never showed. She didn't say that part aloud but it was loudly there for the both of them. He nodded stiffly. He wouldn't apologize, only that nothing he said would make it better, would make his absence okay. Being possessed for a while, then captive for a while more, then lost in a confused haze of only knowing Heartfire... It all seemed so little to what she'd been through and not worth mentioning. They felt like excuses somehow.
She'd been through too much. She deserved better than his reasons and excuses. So he stayed quiet on it.
She explained more, about how she felt like she'd failed. That he'd said to fix things with Zoryn and she felt she made them worse, failed at being a mom. Honestly, oddly, despite that it was his doing and he didn't regret it, he felt pain that Zoryn had gotten hurt in this. And he had no right to feel like he could breathe easier that she wasn't with Zoryn, not like they all had been before. That she didn't want him that way.
That she was all his, and she'd meant it.
Guilt and shame cut into him. His excuses were so pathetic no matter how real they were. He didn't deserve her. He didn't deserve anyone. Now was probably not the time to mention that he'd adopted a kid, had a daughter named Briella that he was frantic over. Oh god, he's gotta find her.
He nodded again. She had to find the girls first before she could get to a safe haven. He would offer to take Defy, so she could travel quicker, find them sooner. But he didn't exactly have the right equipment to feed his baby, and offering to find some other chick to do it might likely get him killed. So for once he was wise enough not to speak up and offer to help.
Except that he could, though. Maybe.
"I could find them. I can bring them to you. I might get them sick though.." his voice faded off. He didn't want to get his and Zor's babies sick. Didn't want to get Diz and Defy sick. Fuck. He really needed to leave.
He shifted, rounding up what strength he could muster to sit himself up with a grunt. "I should go. I don't want to get you sick either. I need you to go to a safe haven." He'd repeated it, but he didn't care. He didn't want them sick, he wanted them safe. He could find the girls and then find Diz again and reunite them.
"I'll find them."
we're slaves to any semblance of touch
Lord, we should quit but we love it too much
