[private] take a look in the mirror

[Tarian]

@[Altissima] surprises him again.

Tarian hadn't been born within Beqanna's borders but even he had heard of the Alliance. But the Loessian reminds himself that had been because of Lepis, then-Queen of Loess. She had asked the silvered pegasus to represent the Southern Kingdom in the tournament and Tarian - eager to return to a life he had once understood - had agreed. But most of the contestants that had fought on behalf of their homes and glory had learned that when the Mountain had summoned magic upon the winner, something had happened and the sun had burnt out.

"A battle for prestige and honor," Tarian tells Wildling, thinking that the mention might strike something in the wandering mare. The pegasus stallion tilts his head towards the slender creature but as she draws nearer, Tarian finds it harder to focus on the Alliance. Each step closer to him that she takes makes the contest harder to recall. His blue eyes watch her and while he concentrates on Altissima, Tarian's wings relax further. "But something happened during the final round," he says softly, "and the world went dark."

The Champion finally does not attempt concealing his injury from her.

(For anyone else, he would have. Tarian had refused healing aid from the Faeries after his final round in the Alliance. He had returned to Loess and  let time and nature heal his injury as he thought it intended.)

His blue eyes move from the limb that he can't bear weight on to and back towards Altissima's deep gaze, where he has started to wonder if he might drown. "Alright," the Champion tells her. If she can heal, Tarian will permit her to try it on him. There's no guarantee that it will work but the gray finds himself leaning towards more the thoughts that if it fails, he won't mind.

If it means that she might stay longer, Tarian finds that he doesn't mind at all.

"Just don't make me glow again," he finally mutters with the ghost of a smile tracing his dark lips.

[Altissima]

His further explanation of the alliance rings the faintest of bells but it is still nothing that Altissima is familiar with. “Battle seems like an odd place to find honour.” She remarks in an unimpressed tone, though there is amusement in her eyes. For a moment, anyway, because she freezes a little when he mentions the world going dark and her face slips into a frown. He’d said it softly, which may have been a kindness, but she cannot help but wonder whether he had been involved in that final round - had he helped to bring about the darkness that had nearly killed her? But she doesn’t ask this, not yet, it is pushed to the back of her mind where it can fester. For now she’s too distracted to linger on those thoughts, as important as they feel. Tarian gives her permission to try to heal him and she’s eager to do so. And when he mentions not glowing again, a small laugh escapes her. “Well you’re going to glow a little, I am working with light, after all.” She points out as her violet eyes dance before she turns her attention back to the leg. “Idiot.” She says again just before her muzzle brushes against his hip in the slightest of touches. So soft that even she isn't totally sure she made contact, and soft enough if he wasn’t watching he may not even know it happened. She doesn’t look over to check, doesn’t let herself wonder what she just did, before she pulls her head back a few inches and surrounds them both with the last bits of sunlight available on this day. And then it condenses on his leg as her attention focuses, turning the whole limb luminescent. No matter how she slides the light over his silver skin, it does not heal. There may be some relief and comfort in the heat that the light brings, like he had been basking in the sun, but nothing more magical than that. “Any better?” She asks when she releases the light and dusk falls a little bit thicker around them like her disappointment. There is a small frown of concentration darkening her indigo gaze as she finally glances over to him. “Or at least tell me I didn’t make it worse.”

artwork by cal

@[Tarian]

[Tarian]

There is a flicker of amusement shining in the depth of his blue eyes. Once upon a time, Tarian might have agreed with that statement. Honor was found in keeping one's word and found in the steadfast actions for the things that couldn't be said. Honor was keeping integrity and then fighting for it when it became lost. He'd been groomed for it in another life but that's all a pale echo now, a past that Tarian finds growing more distant each time that he stands next to the blaze that he considers Altissima to be.

"I'm sure some went for the promise of Magic," the Loessian Champion finally says, speaking of the prize that came from the Mountain itself.  His mouth curls slightly with the quiet humor that lingers in his gaze, wondering if the pale mare even considered Tarian's reason for participating (and some part of him wanting her to consider his character; wanting Wildling to know him well enough that it hadn't been the promise of Magic that enticed him onto the battlefield).

But then she is so close, a touch barely more tangible than the light she wields grazing his hip. Idiot, she calls him and Tarian would agree with her if he could - if his head wasn't filling with other thoughts. Altissima becomes absorbed in her skill and for a moment, the silver stallion just watches; absorbed in the way that the light moved and shifted around her; fascinated by the way it obeyed and then startled as it started to converge around his injured limb. There is a warmth against his skin but he isn't sure if that is because of her magic or simply her proximity.

Winds.

"It's not worse," Tarian tells her. In truth, the pegasus can't tell if there is any difference in the leg. He still stands with it half-cocked, his weight leaning towards the opposing hip though his white wings have come back to their natural position against his sterling sides. Instinct wants him to test out the limb and yet Tarian refrains out of pride, not willing to appear as the cripple in front of Wilding.

And yet, something more in him doesn't want her to bear the weight of disappointment that he feels setting like the sunlight around them.

Tarian knows that he won't be going anywhere, anytime soon. He'll rest the leg, eventually taking baby steps until he can hobble his way back to Loess (where Cheri can hopefully heal it). The gray stallion knows that he should excuse Altissima (or at least make an excuse for her to leave), but the Loessian finds himself asking the always Wandering Wildling instead, "Where did you pick this trick up?"

[Altissima]

Altissima is a little annoyed with herself for not being about to make his leg better, though she is glad to hear him confirm that it is not worse. And it is not hard to oblige his question with an answer, her violet eyes holding a small smile illuminated now by the twinkling light around her. “The light? I was born with some of it.” She still isn’t entirely sure which parent she had inherited it from, though she is glad that it seems to be evolving into something that is all her own. “But whatever I just tried to do to your leg… that’s the first time I’ve done that.” She admits with a slightly sheepish grin, pretending away the rest of the truth - that it was the first time she’s used her light with anyone at all, the first time she had ever wanted to. And even though it had not helped, she is still glad he let her try. She notes how he’s still not putting weight on the leg, wonders if it’s pride - a feeling she knows all too well and one she can’t fault him for. Altissima moves again, coming around behind him to stand on his other side. Not so close that his wings could brush against her skin with a breath - though she thinks about how that might feel with her wings gone from her sides as they are now - but close enough that if either of them wanted to, they could stretch out their neck and touch the other. This is all completely contrary to what she should be doing, but she finds that she does not want there to be too much space between them. “The moon will be out soon.” She remarks casually as her eyes take in the bright yellow glow of fireflies nearby. “So I guess then you’ll have two things to sulk about, Glow Worm.” She intends her next words to be a joke as well, as she turns her blue-tinted head to look at him but her voice grows quieter as the words tumble out - and it feels like her heart lodges itself in her throat. “Too bad there are no hot springs nearby.” What is she doing, bringing that up? She was thinking about how they might soothe his leg but by the time she finishes the sentence, unable to look away from his face, she’s thinking of other things - like what might have happened if she hadn’t tried to run.

artwork by cal

@[Tarian]

[Tarian]

As he watches Altissima come close again and tell him that she had been born with the light, Tarian's practical mind (his! A mind that is much more suited for battle strategy, protocols for maintaining Loess' borders) starts to imagine fantastic settings: that the light-wielding mare was born during such a brilliant dawn that she has been shining every day since, even imagines that perhaps the Long Night lasted so long only because the mare near him got sick and lost her light.

He thinks Altissima such a fierce, blazing woman that even if his thoughts border along blasphemy against Beqanna's Mountain, Tarian thinks had she not been ill, Altissima could have been the one to break the dark.

And instead, she is attempting to use her craft on a foolish stallion who landed too abruptly.

Cheri will chide him for it, he muses, when he eventually returns to Loess. But how exactly he will do that can wait. The day continues to fade and the shadows continue to grow longer while the sky starts to bruise a darker shade of blue. His gaze turns away from the treeline and glances towards Altissima who has come alongside him, close enough that if he reached, the winged horse could touch her. She is teasing him about the moon again and about the way that they both know he'll be glowing soon. His smile turns wry but the Loessian finds that he doesn't mind his glow anymore than he minds that he doesn't know how (or when) he'll be returning to Loess.

Despite his injury and the problems waiting for him there, he's content to "sulk" about his current circumstance a little longer if it means that she might stay a little longer.

"Ah, but Milady," he can't help but quipping back to her, "I think you mean three." Meaning that her presence here should be something else that Tarian might have formerly been irritated about (and if anybody else had found him here, he would have been). He still isn't entirely sure what he's doing because these moments with Altissima always feel so surreal, like he had so fiercely wished to see her again and so his mind tricks him with a dream. But the heat emanating from her is very real and even if the feelings that Tarian feels are entirely new for the soldier, he finds that he wants to brave them. The moon has started to rise and his silver coat has started to softly glow, even though the day's warmth is still lingering.

Angling his shoulder (while still not shifting his weight) towards hers, Tarian's head moves a little closer to the shimmering Altissima. She had said that the moon should be nice and full tonight; he has no control over bright he will get but his mind is conspiring ways to get the pale woman to stay. "It is," he comments on the lack of any nearby hot springs, "but maybe you can give me something else to sulk about." His grin curves slightly as he glances down at her, wondering if she might take him up on his challenge. "Do you think you can glow brighter than me?"

Her power - though it was tied to sunlight - was growing and Tarian wondered how curious she might be to test the theory that she could glow brighter than him (perhaps even use his own light for that); he wonders that if he can get her to challenge the light of a bright moon if she might just stay all night.

@

[Altissima]

At his comment about how he has three things to sulk about, her eyes shift closer to pink as an embarrassed wariness prods at her temper - her pale ears flicking backwards for a moment. If her presence was so awful, why hadn’t he told her to leave?

And why, in the next moment, does he angle himself and move his head a little closer?

The colour of her eyes cools again in her confusion as she frowns at him while she attempts to figure out what every action means and why she cares so much. How can she possibly be so distressed at the idea that he could find her presence a burden? That he hadn’t enjoyed their banter or her visit to Loess as much as she had. But if that were true, then why would he have tried to keep her conscious during the darkness?

Her frustration over the lack of clarity surrounding his thoughts towards her is growing and it might have been enough for her to reach out to him, to shut out the worries and find an answer for herself, but his remark about sulking is too fresh in her mind. Perhaps it had just been a jest but her uncertainty is enough that she remains where she is, only keeping her head turned towards him. Unwilling to make him uncomfortable by assuming, and unwilling to risk more obvious rejection if she highlights her inconvenient feelings.

A small smile tugs at her mouth at his question, and it most distracts her from her confusing thoughts. “You call that a challenge?” She remarks, having to shift her eyes away from his so she can focus. So she looks at the slope of his neck, and the growing glow that she can see there illuminating the silver strands. It is only slightly easier to focus, because there is an annoying part of her that wants to reach out and touch his neck, but she’s able to dim his glow completely and then fuels her own with what she takes from him and the light of the rising moon.

She lets it shimmer there on her coat for a moment before speaking again. “I prefer it the other way around though.” And the light leaves her body and encases him, turning him as bright and luminescent as his leg had been - and illuminating the smile that’s now more obvious in her violet eyes.

@Tarian

[Tarian]

The ground that Tarian has always stood on had always been firm. It never shifted or gave way. He had been raised as a prince, with the knowledge that the land beneath his hooves would one day be his. And then the world changed - that home became lost but Tarian still stood. He got involved in a couple of scrapes and brawls as a young stallion but even despite the injuries he'd earn, Tarian always stood at the end. He'd fought battles and wars and still, he stood.

Even now while one leg begs to crumple, Tarian refuses to let it.

But with Altissima? All it takes is a glance from her and suddenly, everything shifts for Tarian. He had meant to imply more than once that he'd like her to stay. For as much as he enjoys bantering with her, some part of him wanted to directly ask if she would. But to do that would expose the vulnerability that he wants her to, and some part of him wonders what she would do with that knowledge. She never seemed to enjoy when their conversations lingered on her for too long, and the silver pegasus had quickly become accustomed to the way that she would gradually change the conversation back to him or something else entirely.

What would she have said if he asked her plainly that he wished she would stay?

And worse, what would he have done if she said no?

(There is more to this, too. Because each moment that he spends with Altisimma and enjoys it, he reminds himself that Loess is still there. That he has still promised his loyalty and fealty to that kingdom and it can't have all of it if he divides it. That with Altissima - who would never settle for kingdom borders - it can never be anything more than chance encounters and the hope that she kindles within him that each interaction might be longer than the last.)

He nearly laughs when she takes his glow. Tarian doesn't mind having it gone. And there is something in his expression that softens when his gaze goes searching for Altissima's eyes again. It doesn't last long because the light-wielding woman returns his glow two-fold. There is no missing Tarian in this small meadow but he only has eyes for the woman beside him and the radiant smile she gives in reply. "I think it looks better on you."

@Altissima

[Altissima]

Altissima has forgotten (mostly) about his leg, she might have remarked on it if she hadn't. Maybe she would have encouraged him to lie down, or maybe she would have needled him enough until it bothered him so that he was forced to. She had collapsed in front of him once, it only seemed fair that he doing the same.

But her mind isn't on that leg anymore, it's on the glow surrounding him and how it shines in his blue eyes, illuminating the soft look there that she does not understand.

She isn’t entirely sure whether he’s teasing her again or not, and it’s not quite a compliment, but it eases a soft laugh from her. It’s a nervous laugh and she doesn’t quite recognize the sound, she isn't sure she's ever made a one like it before. No one's ever made her feel nervous and if they had, she hadn't stuck around long enough to feel it. There’s a short silence after her laugh fades but then she finds her voice - shining violet gaze focused on his eyes. “Well, what’s one more thing for us to disagree on?” And then before she can think about it, she’s reaching out to brush her muzzle against the strands of his pale mane and she splits the glow evenly between them as she does.

So they match.

Some sense seeps back in as soon as the glow evens out between them and she freezes - her muzzle resting gently against his mane. She’d like to stay there, like to linger and admire how the light shimmers before her eyes and be close enough that can focus on his illuminated hair. But she pulls back when her confusion seeps back into her conscious thoughts and she doesn’t look at him as she turns her attention back up to the sky and she cannot manage to speak a single one of the thoughts racing through her mind.

@Tarian

[Tarian]

Tarian has forgotten about the pain in his hindlimb as well. He's been careful to keep the weight off it and as he drifts nearer to the alluring Altissima, it's easy to forget about the old injury completely. He is swept up in noticing all the fine details that he has failed to notice until now. How the blue sheen of her skin makes her more luminescent than he and how that makes the lunar glow look far lovelier on her than it ever could him (and if she disagreed on that, then Tarian thinks he could happily spend the entirety of this night trying to convince her).

None of those words come out, though.

He's admiring her fine mane in return - a silvery color that could put the moon to shame - and Tarian feels it again. That conflicted feeling rising in his chest, the one that says if Altissima wanted more than just tonight, he would give it to her. The one that keeps rising and swelling in him like a tide, bringing the (terrifying) realization that there might not be a bottom to it. What does he do with a revelation like that?

It makes him want to tell @Altissima the story of his parent's murder and why this - why them - could be such a dangerous thing.

(This is why Tarian spent so many years in the Guard. He enjoyed the fighting. He liked the regimentation of his days and nights. He enjoyed having a purpose and an outlet for his simmering anger. But there had always been the hope beneath the warrior's skin that one day he would cross paths with his parent's killers. That one day he would either redeem their deaths or he would become  another casualty in a feud that had lasted for more than three generations.)

But this doesn't seem like the time or the place to explain that. And if he tells her that story, would she understand why?

The silver stallion feels her stiffen and his head turns slightly, wanting to reach out for her neck. Wanting to touch her cheek. But she looks up and away, at the stars overhead. Tarian knows at that moment, he would much rather look at her - that she is something far more divine than anything shining above them - but Altissima has never seemed to enjoy being the focus of attention. So he lets her lead his blue-eyed gaze to the heavens, while the two of them seem to exist only in the galaxies inside their minds.

"Could you imagine it?" Tarian finally asks her, unable to keep the questions that linger in his mind to himself. "The two of us getting along," he murmurs, shifting his weight again and spreading his pale wings wide enough so that the feathers of one might graze against her glowing skin.

[Altissima]

Is he drifting closer? Or did Altissima misjudge the distance between them? Or is she simply wanting it so much that she is imagining it? She keeps her eyes on the sky, on the stars that are growing in brightness as the last bit of light from the day leeches colour. When he speaks, her concentration fractures enough that the glow around them both dims. Until they are just a part of the meadow, just part of the scenery. She keeps his matched with hers, though, even when a small laugh escapes her at his murmured words. But that sound dies when his wing brushes against her skin, her eyes closing to savour it. The feeling is better than what she had pictured moments ago and she becomes aware that she wants more. It's a slow awareness, like waking up. Her response to his question is quiet, no barb to be found in a single syllable of it. “It’ll never happen.” She tells him this as she side-steps a little bit closer. Close enough that the brush of his wing is constant against her skin and the sensation sends a pleasant chill down her spine as her heartbeat quickens. There’s a smile in the corner of her mouth, but she doesn’t know what to do next. Does she reach out for him again? Altissima has never wanted someone like this before and she's frustrated with the fears that hold her back, the uncertainty that makes her wary about taking it any further. All she manages is that step, though, and when she opens her eyes she’s still got her head tilted upwards still but she’s watching Tarian from the corner of her eye - wondering what is going through his mind. Torn between wanting him to give her a reason to run and a reason to stay.

artwork by cal

@Tarian