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  • Beqanna

    COTY

    Assailant -- Year 226

    QOTY

    "But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura


    you always seem to give me another try; aten
    #1
    Once, when she had been very small, all spindle legs and a downy coat that hadn’t yet shown the copper fire underneath, Lilli had been gifted a day of freedom. Her mother had gone on patrol and somewhere between the discussion of who was to watch the Regent’s youngest child, Lilli had slipped through the cracks and had woken up beneath their willow tree alone. Her older twin siblings had parted ways: Brielle gone before anyone could ask where she was even going, Jay with his mind to the stars and the sun and the clouds, trying to read the signs in nature around them. And Malachi, her eldest brother and champion, had stolen a moment with his sweet Kalina.

    The little girl had been utterly alone.

    She had wandered a while, probably following a butterfly or the lovely sound of a bird, until she came to a path. It was one she had remembered taking with her silver dam as they made their round on a morning patrol. The trail wove and weaved through the wood until it finally came to a spot where the river was, a enchanting bubbling sound that could be heard throughout Murmuring Rivers. On the other side, there had been an alluring bunch of blue flowers. She can remember seeing them, their wonderful scent fragrant and dancing on the midsummer breeze.

    It had made her mother smile. Lilli can remember seeing something soften in Aletta’s dark eyes as they gazed across the river, taking a moment to admire the lovely cluster of wildflowers on the other side. So when Lilli had been gifted her freedom, she had thought of those flowers and the way that it made her mother seem so much happier, so girlish and carefree when the Regent was so often made of iron and steel.

    The little girl had ventured down that path, to the place where the river bubbled and laughed, invited her closer until eventually, it beckoned her to cross it.

    She tried. Her heart fluttered like butterfly wings in her chest and each step took her deeper and deeper, the water rising back her knees, to her chest, past her barrel until finally on the little girl’s head had remained above the water. Her nostrils had flared at the chill of the water, at the push of the current, of the way that ground felt less and less secure beneath her hooves until finally.. the ground was no longer there. It gave way and while the current wasn’t overly strong, the little filly hadn’t been the most adept of swimmers. It swept her down the river, the pine trees blurring into masses of green and all she could hear was the rush of water in her ears.

    It filled her lungs. They burned and raged for air and no matter how Lilli fought, no matter how valiant her little hooves tried to find the ground beneath her, she was carried further and further down the river that had so often laughed with her. She doesn’t know when the ground came back or how – she only remembers the feel of sand gritting against her coat, of it everywhere as she laid curled up on the shore. She remembers her lungs filling and pushing beneath her ribs as if they still didn’t believe they would ever get enough air again.

    And then she remembers the feel of kisses pressed against her neck, against her forehead, of a warm body that stood beside her as she somehow managed to find her legs again. Aletta murmured words of love and assurance into Lilli’s ears, ”Oh Lillibird.”

    Beqanna has been like that day in the river. Lilli has tried to venture out own on her own but somewhere along the way, she has lost her footing. The world has spun out of control and she can no longer feel the world beneath her. Arriving in Taiga, learning that Elaina was in Hyaline, learning that she could help others, has been Lilli trying to feel the world beneath her again.


    She longs for permanency, for something steady and stable that won’t give way when the pressures and problems arise. 

    Talking to Aten, learning that their might be a shred of the Dale out there has helped the young mare take those first tentative steps. His words have planted a seed in her mind and it has taken root: there might be a chance to find out what, if anything, remains of the Dale. Her one last connection to her family.

    She seeks the golden stallion out in the early hours of the morning, enough that time passing (she hopes) to finish the morning patrols. The chestnut mare leaves her little hideaway among the massive trees and heads for the groves where she knows to find Aten. Her mind is already reeling with possibilities, still processing his words from their earlier conversation and Lilli is eager to learn whatever knowledge that the stallion has.

    She keeps an eye out overhead, seeking his winged companion, but the bird is either aware of her and has already alerted Aten or Lilli, not for the first time, is looking in all the wrong places.

    LILLIANA
    i left home on account of snow
    (buried all the things i know)


    @[Aten]
    but it's all in the past, love
    it's all gone with the wind
    Reply
    #2
    Unknown to Lilliana, she was looking in the right place indeed, but the falcon that normally accompanied him wasn't flying above in the air for once. Turul had gone out earlier to hunt and, while Aten and Lethia had been away at the Island Resort, the falcon had stayed behind for extra protection over the foals. Since it had been quite a lot of work, Aten told his friend to have some time to himself, to rest and recover, so the falcon had taken that to full advantage.

    Currently, the falcon was roosting in a tree in a glenn not very far from Aten, so he could still be reached if needed, but it was away from the small 'herd' Aten had, so he didn't have to worry about being disturbed. The golden stallion was glad to let his friend rest, since things seemed to be at peace for right now. Winter had settled over Beqanna, the Taiga's redwoods speckled white and green like an appaloosa's coat. Aten's own also had that same appearance, save for his golden coloring. His winter coat now fluffed out slightly around his frame, offsetting his muscular appearance, but it still remained sleek so he was still considered an attractive specimen.

    Winter was hard on Beqanna's residents, if only because food was hard to come by. Taiga's grass meadows beneath the trees had long become covered by the snow, and what grass there was had dried out. But the horses of Taiga, of Beqanna, were hardened survivors, and Aten had ways to navigate a dwindling food supply.

    For example, off in the river and near the ocean were grasses he could feast on, the meadow grass beneath the snow wasn't horrible, and when necessary, the stallion would snack on the tree bark. It wasn't a preferable option, but the bark was digestible, it didn't taste horrible, and it was safe enough to eat. Aten had taught Owin and, when she wanted to learn, Popinjay, along with Lethia, about surviving during the winter since Taiga received a lot of snow and made food scarce. They were all learning well, and at times, he left them alone to use their skills for themselves so they would know what to do when he wasn't around.

    Plus, they had to learn independence. He couldn't hover over them all the time. Even if he wanted to be near Lethia all the time.

    But this early in the morning, Aten had finished his walk of the southwestern border and had settled into the groves. He was currently digging through the snow with his front hoof to find some food, and managed to succeed, lowering his head to nibble on the dried grass. He did his best to ignore the bland taste, swallowing it down just to have something in his belly and keep himself warm.

    The chilled wind sent a shiver through Aten's thick coat, and the stallion looked up as he munched the grass in his mouth. Off in the distance, he spotted something moving against the trees, and upon recognizing the chestnut mare, he stopped chewing and let out a whinny to call to her.

    He wondered what Lilliana was doing here this early in the morning; perhaps she was searching for something?

    Aten waited for the mare to come closer before he addressed her, "This is a bit of a surprise, but good morning Lilliana. What brings you to the grove so early?"

    @[lilliana]
    Reply
    #3
    A shiver runs involuntarily down her spine and Lilli turns her head to look back at her slender form, frowning slightly at the way her body reacts to the chill in the air. Unlike her mother, she isn’t equipped for the frozen months and the crimson girl longs for the warmth of the sun. Her body craves its heat as the air comes out in ribbons of vapor from her flaring nostrils.

    Lilliana sighs and then turns her head back to the patch of woods in front of her, her blue eyes scanning through the trees hoping for a sight or sign of Aten.

    The wood is so quiet and a swiveling ear belies at how uneasy that makes her, on how it forbids herself to settle. (There is a stillness to this season that does nothing for her mind that races for questions.) Her weight shifts gingerly from one side to the other as she decides to move on, accepting that this request might be a foolhardy one. The lithe mare moves through another copse of pristine woods, made that much redder and imposing without the green of the leaves and ferns to vie for contrast.

    She longs for something to break the silence. A bird to flap its wings. The wind to come rushing through and make the branches quake in response. But the forest seems so impossibly deserted. For a girl who had been one of multiple siblings, who had numerous aunts and uncles and cousins and who later had many nieces and nephews, the silence is something she has a hard time abiding where the echoes of family and laughter had once been.

    Where her life had once been.

    There is life here in Taiga. She can feel the hum of it beneath the forest canopy. There are children and families and others make their home within this forest. It is a start for Lilli and determined to make the best of it, she seeks Aten out today. Taiga can never be home for Lilli – that concept has long gone blurred and hazy in her mind. (If ‘home’ exists, it a feeling for her. It the peace she feels underneath the Hyaline stars knowing that her love and her secrets are kept safe within the heart of her golden cousin.) But Taiga borders Hyaline and as there is nowhere else for her to go, she has added Taiga to a list that has contained the names of places like Culloden and Paraiso.

    It is the history she craves, a want for knowledge that has started to grow since her return from the Mountain. She’s always been an apt pupil. There had been multiple lessons on etiquette and diplomacy growing up, of histories and alliances and wars. But that history has been rendered useless here – what cares do the Beqanna residents have of Frostbane or Ostere? What difference is it to them about the threats and villains that have plagued her bloodline? What does it matter to them what Lilli has lost?

    Beqanna is an entirely new place with her own set of heroes and villains. But the history, the stories that can’t be changed, hold an allure for the young mare to learn where her ancestors came from, what motivated them, what their stories were like. Maybe if she can find where it at all started, there might be a chance to find a way to mend the broken pieces of her that no longer fit within her chest like they once did. Maybe knowing where she came from could help her understand where she is supposed to go.

    Beautiful, silly thoughts that Lilli refuses to let go of.

    Finally, her pleas to the universe are heard and the baritone cry of a stallion rings through the woods. An unabashed smile finds her face then wiping away any of the disconcerting thoughts that had been there before. Blue eyes brighten eagerly as they find the familiar form of the golden stallion as he approaches and Lilliana goes to meet him where he paused. Her head tilts to one side as she glances up to him, ”Not an unpleasant one I hope?” And while the question is a playful one, there is concern behind her voice that speaks of not wanting to impose on him.

    If this is a bad time, she can always come back.

    But Aten gives no such clues and the mare ventures to her next question, ”When you were speaking of the fire the other day and when we spoke of the Dale, I was hoping..” she pauses here, trying to explain all the words that swim in her mind. Gently, slowly she offers what he has probably already surmised: ”I’m not from here but my family was once. I grew up with bedtime stories about the Forbidden Dale.” As probably many had, others who had called that place home and etched their memories into its hallowed ground. Shyly she asks, ”Do you think there is a chance that a piece of it still exists?”

    A ridiculous wish but if there is one thing that Lilli is capable of, it is hoping in the face of adversity.

    LILLIANA
    i left home on account of snow
    (buried all the things i know)


    @[Aten]
    but it's all in the past, love
    it's all gone with the wind
    Reply
    #4
    Aten shook his head, "Not at all, I could do with some pleasant conversation. Otherwise it has been very pressuring lately; I haven't had a conversation unrelated to diplomacy with another horse in quite some time."

    Lilliana began speaking again, reminding Aten of a conversation they had the other day regarding the fire that had once razed Taiga's redwoods. Still a dark topic, the stallion did his best to hide his distaste, but Lilliana had continued on, obviously going somewhere else with this conversation. The word 'Dale' came up and Aten had a feeling he already knew where this would go.

    Sure enough, after mentioning her family, the mare asked about the Dale, if, in Aten's opinion, a piece of it still existed out there somewhere. Aten honestly had no idea how to respond to her inquiry, since, like her, he didn't know what it was like to grow up in the Dale nor exactly what had happened to it following the Reckoning. He didn't listen to bedtime stories of dark kingdoms and bloody wars between enemies, instead about the stars in the night sky, how they connected Beqanna, and of Epona, a legendary horse that his dam had grown up with stories about herself.

    Aten's eyes grew serious as he looked at Lilliana, "I am not one to discount anything in this land; Beqanna has proven to me to be a strange place if not only also one that shouldn't be underestimated. But, to be honest, I can't say that any piece of the Dale still exists outside the hearts of the horses who may have lived there or are descendants of those who did.

    "The topography of Beqanna was changed drastically following the Reckoning; I wouldn't have any idea where to start looking myself. Perhaps history itself holds a clue, if the entire story is known. There are bits and pieces that I may be missing, but in my years of living alone in the forest, I did venture out on occasion to gather information, fragments of Beqanna's history to piece it together so I could understand the land.

    "What I mentioned that day was only a piece of the Dale's history. I do not know everything exactly that happened between them, what was said, but I do have knowledge that extends back to Beqanna's beginning thanks to what has been passed down through stories and descendants."

    @[lilliana]
    Reply
    #5
    Aten shakes his head and says that he could use some pleasant company.

    Lilli feels a knot forming in her chest, a twinge of guilt that rises at his words. Of course, he was under pressure. He was the Protector of Taiga and he was kind enough to spare a moment for the crimson mare. But Aten had other responsibilities and things he could be doing and Lilliana for a moment wishes she had come to him with something other than questions. She wishes that she could have truly come for the simple pleasure of his company.

    Aten’s eyes grow serious and Lilliana’s expression stills, quiets in the way that a moment stills before a summer storm. She isn’t sure if she is ready to hear his answer. Her heart flutters with hummingbird wings in her chest and Lilli, despite knowing that Beqanna is different and changed, hopes for a moment that there might something of what came before. She hopes that perhaps somewhere out there might be a link to a past that might help lead her to a future.

    Lilliana has felt for some time that she has one hoof in her past and another in the present, living in this odd sensation of being neither here or there. She keeps waiting for something and she isn’t sure what that might be.

    Wilder things have happened here and wilder things could happen still, she thinks.

    The Dale is gone. But Aten offers hope in his words – that she might learn something of it in the others who still carry the memory of the Forbidden Dale with them. It isn’t the answer she has hoped for but it still offers an idea. There is still something to aspire to here, something that might be revealed and determination flashes behind those blue eyes. She refuses to be disappointed. Lilliana tilts her head up to Aten and offers her gratitude in a shy smile, ”Thank you Aten. Do you know anybody from the Forbidden Dale? Anybody who might know something of it?” An immortal, she muses or some magical entity.

    But when her own brash questions subside, she is left with the knowledge that Aten had spent years alone in the forest. She can’t imagine years of wandering and solitude – months had been more than enough for her. Her heart goes out to him and it softens her features, the determination fading into something gentler that stays: ”Is that how you met Turul? Living in the forest?” Her head raises and she glances beyond Aten’s proud facade for a moment, searching the top of snow-covered trees for a sign of his winged companion before her gaze comes to rest on the champagne stallion again. 


    LILLIANA
    i left home on account of snow
    (buried all the things i know)


    @[Aten] I mentioned that she knew Turul's name.. hope that was alright? If not, just let me know and I'll change it!
    but it's all in the past, love
    it's all gone with the wind
    Reply
    #6
    Aten returned the smile with a friendly one, in the hopes that the mare's own shyness would start to disappear when she was around him. Aten didn't think it was due to being flustered that Lilliana showed a bit of hesitance in that display of gratitude, and he wanted to help her conquer whatever block she had that caused her to still exhibit some shyness here and there.

    She had no need to do so around him.

    Lilliana thanked the golden stallion, to which Aten nodded since it seemed she had more to say. He had to ponder her words for a moment, for what she was asking could become quite complicated. After all, hierarchies here in Beqanna could be all over the place due to marriages between royal bloodlines or those who had staged a coup and taken over the throne which led to unknown lineages that could be from another land entirely or stretching far back into Beqanna's earliest days.

    While Aten was giving this some thought, Lilliana brought up a topic he'd mentioned. She had clearly heard him say he'd spent years alone in the forest, and her eyes almost seemed to soften at that. Aten understood that most likely she wasn't offering her pity; merely her concern, her wish to be there for him perhaps, since she might not know what an experience like that had been like and all she could do was offer a shoulder to lean on.

    He watched as Lilliana looked towards the tree tops, perhaps looking for the raptor she'd mentioned by name, and Aten began again, "No. I met Turul shortly after I was asked to take over Taiga's leadership. My years in the forest were in isolation except for the occasions I ventured just outside it's borders to collect the information I share.

    "As for the information about the Forbidden Dale, your best bet would be to seek out any descendants of the leaders. I recall the first one was a mare named Ryatah, and to my knowledge, she is still alive as an immortal. I last heard from horses in the Field that she lived in Tephra, but I can't confirm it since I have not been there myself, nor has Turul. If she is not located there, I do not know where she is now. One of her colts has an indirect tie to myself; he goes by the name of Raed. I know of his existence through Lethia; she encountered him and conceived a foal with him. I don't know where Raed would be, and I haven't seen him around Taiga, so I am not sure Lethia would know. You could get what he looks like out of her, if anything.

    "Charlemagne was another ruler, but I have not met any of her offspring. Her daughter Alayne passed the throne down to a mare named Delicate instead of her only son, a colt named Mano I believe. Delicate herself raised two foals sired by Fenrir, Charlemagne's mate. Her line ended with the three of them.

    "There is a possibility you could get some information about the Dale out of Magnus. He lives out in Tephra as well last I heard; he sired a filly through Katana, who was the Dale's leader after Delicate. He lived in the Dale for quite some time as well.

    "The descendants from each of these rulers number many, and while I have some names, I do not know all of their exact locations. Your best option, if you want to risk it, is to seek out either Ryatah or Magnus in Tephra. If you choose not too, you'll have to do some searching to see if any of Charlemagne's, Delicate's, or Katana's foals are still out there, or their grand foals, who may know information their parents gave them. There is much more I could tell you about the Dale, but that's not what you came here for."

    There was one horse Aten had withheld information about from Lilliana for her own protection; that a stallion named Carnage had ties to the Forbidden Dale as well. He did not wish for her to know about him, the dark history that surrounded that creature. Lilliana would be much safer not knowing all he had done.

    @[lilliana] not a problem. We'll just assume at some point Aten told her Turul's name.
    Reply
    #7
    The land of her birth wasn't so different from Beqanna in terms of magic.

    Her father had been an airbender, a gifted one who called hurricane and gales with only a thought, a beckon. There had been those who could shift the sand, who talked to stars and walked in dreams, who could see the past and glimpses of several different futures depending on the choices made. They had been of all kinds of colors and gifted with all sorts of things: scales, wings, horns, immortality. So there is no shock when she sees them here (but as one born without any powers or gifts, there is a touch of wonder and mysticism to it all). She thinks that maybe there is someone old enough to remember pieces of the history of the old Neutral Mythic kingdom, someone who might indulge her as she mentions the names of Solomon and Coca-Cola and Helios.

    Aten seems to take her question to heart because where she expects to hear a name or two or even an apology that he has nothing more to tell her, he recites names and bloodlines with a precision that would have earned her scholar brother's admiration. But Lilliana stills and stays silent, listens with patience and soaks it in with all the hunger of someone who has longed for the first sweet grasses of spring after a long winter. She glances up at him, reciting the names internally to herself to keep them safe in her memory. Ryatah, she thinks, Magnus. She has no idea who these horses are but they come from Tephra, the place with the volcano, the place where Wolfbane had said he was born.

    The impossible map of Beqanna shifts in her mind again and it starts to take on a shape. Pieces of it click into place and at that moment, she smiles up at Aten. There is a chance she might gain a knowledge of Beqanna yet. The fog of the unknown is clearing away and revealing an image in her mind.

    It's a small triumph in what feels like a neverending quest to understand this place.

    There are many names and many lessons here, she thinks. But the young mare is determined to commit them to memory and so she tries to make space for it in her mind, placing the knowledge alongside the other things she knows about the Forbidden Dale. Small scenes in a long reel of history but she will take whatever small snippets she can get.

    But another question causes her head to tilt and the smile falters. Aten had been the leader of Taiga? She wants to ask and yet.. she doesn't. There is a reason why she doesn't and Lilliana won't reveal that even to herself. A thought forms in her mind, ready to take on a shape and to become a word, to become an image in her mind. She gives a shake to her head, refusing to let it do so. Instead, she looks away from Aten.


    The snow shimmers, casting colors in the pale sunglow on the frozen ground around them. Lilliana considers it for a moment, absorbing everything Aten has told her. She peers up at him again through the waves of her forelock, concern for him casting over her gentle features: "You only left these woods for information?" Given everything he has told her, if it was a mission or job he was given by a previous ruler, he had played his role well.

    But it still seems like such an impossibly lonely existence.

    "I hope Beqanna knows what an excellent historian she has in you," she finally manages. "Thank you for sharing it with me."


    LILLIANA
    i left home on account of snow
    (buried all the things i know)


    @[Aten]
    but it's all in the past, love
    it's all gone with the wind
    Reply
    #8
    @[lilliana] I think your post was a good place to end this one if you're cool with it?
    Reply




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