Nemeon is exhausted from waking up and finding that the world has changed. The fear he used to experience as a youth has only heightened over the last few years - ever since he woke up underwater once, his statue-self crumbling down with the land where he had thought he would be safe. The water hadn’t been terribly deep, considering, but he cannot forget what it was like to take that first breath and feel the water rush in - to see the moonlight but only as hazy rays filtering down towards him.

He has been on edge for the last few years - it feels like the lands change again just as soon as he begins to relax.

And here it has happened again. Some of the lands look the same as before, which bizarrely is more concerning than it is comforting. Now he's watching the trees and rocks, and the land beneath his hooves, wondering whether it's going to move again.

It's probably irrational for him to cast a sideways glance towards the autumn-coloured trees that are growing here, perfectly healthy, despite the fact that it is spring everywhere else. He has wandered this forest so many times in his life but this is new and now he is suspicious of it all.

A low, quiet grumble escapes him as he walks past a maple with fiery-red leaves and doesn't even pause to wonder what they must look like beneath the sun. It is early in the night still and he has many hours left to enjoy - or to spend in his usual disquiet, focusing on disagreements with moonlit trees rather than dig to any deeper thoughts that are hiding within his lonely soul.

Nemeon is not left alone with his thoughts for long, which is a good thing even if it comes with other anxieties - like ones that keep him from drawing too close despite the joy that fills his heart the instant he is not alone even just for a moment.

The pale mare's soft smile is easy to match, coaxing a small one into his golden eyes. He’s fascinated by her glowing eyes, though he tries not to stare at them too directly or too much so he does not frighten her away. Any little bit of light in his world of darkness draws his attention just like it would to a moth - and he is just as likely to get burned by this impulse as those soft-winged creatures.

Luckily for these potentially spiraling thoughts, he’s distracted by her question - if he had guessed, it wouldn’t have been that. Nemeon blinks, and his smile disappears because he’s not sure how to react and his confusion is evident in his voice “A wolf?” And he looks around, just to be sure that his response is the absolute truth. “No.”

His curiosity quickly overrides anything else and then he cannot help but to ask quizzically. “Are they a friend or a foe?” She doesn’t look like she is frightened, but Nemeon knows fear can show many faces.

Her laughter is bright and sweet and he does not feel foolish for having caused it. The wolf is a friend - a best friend - and Nemeon feels more jealousy than anything else in that moment. He finds he does not want to hold onto that harsh emotion as soon as it arises, at least, and so he buries it quickly where it will needle at his brain later once they have parted.

“In that case, maybe I can help you find him?” It feels only natural for him to offer - at the very least, they could wander a little and heighten the chances of finding him. “Do they…” He pauses for a moment, a little taken aback by the realization that he doesn’t know whether ‘does he look like other wolves’ is a helpful question or not. Perhaps this is all a little embarrassing to admit but Nemeon finds that he doesn’t mind, and grins a little at his own lack of knowledge. “Do wolves come in different colours? Will your friend be easy to spot?” Nemeon had never paused to wonder this before. He knew wolves existed and occasionally heard their serenades during his moonlit wanderings, but he had never been up close with one before.

When she asks about what he’s done alone at night, Nemeon does his best to keep from wincing externally.

His denial about how truly lonesome he has runs deep within him, and he is unwilling to confront that now - when his company offers sweet smiles. So he gives her a small smile in return, and hopes it comes across as warm instead of sad. “Oh… well. The night is when I can be out looking for friends. Or wolf-friends. I couldn’t be much help at all if you were looking for your wolf during the day.” Considering their activity during the night he could reasonably assume wolves were nocturnal like him, though he also assumed it was safe to bet they could move in daylight if the need arose.

She accepts his offer of help, and Nemeon is thrilled for the chance to attempt to be useful. Even if it may be difficult - considering her description of her friend - but he is fascinated by the idea of such a creature so he hopes they are able to find them.

The grey and gold stallion begins to move off to begin (for him, continue for her) the search for the shadow-wolf, pausing only to make sure she joins. But he is careful, as always, to ensure a polite amount of space exists between their bodies. His desire for companionship does not cancel out the fact that he is inherently dangerous. Their time together has already begun to run out, a timer ticking constantly in the back of his mind as he has to remain conscious of proximity and exposure length.

There is so much, too much, twisting in his mind all the time - but whatever anxiety it causes him, at least he can do his best to not harm anyone else.

And does his best to make sure as little of that constant anxiety seeps outwards as possible - trying to appear completely calm. His wings are folded neatly at his sides and his golden eyes begin to scan the shadows around them, waiting to see if something wolf-shaped stands out from the rest. It is good to have something to talk about as they travel, even if that thing is his complicated relationship with daylight.

“The first of those, I suppose. I have never seen it to know whether I would like it or not.” Just once has he seen the sun, in a memory that has turned fond for him now that time has passed but was so painful at the time - a friend who accidentally made herself into the sun. The image of it haunts him still, appearing in his mind, and he wonders if he would dream of it if he could sleep.

It is a sweet haunting more than a malicious one. Sometimes it even brings him comfort, knowing that he has at least once known what it felt like to be touched by the sun’s light.

Now he explains his reality to this friend of shadow-wolves. Although it does pain him, it is the least painful of the curses he bears. He will always long for the sun because he can never see it, but the radioactivity is so much worse. “I turn into stone when the sun rises, and do not become a conscious breathing thing again until it sets.”

Terribly lonely is the perfect way to describe Nemeon’s life - though that has very little to do with the fact that he is a night-creature. “There are worse things.” He quietly says in response to her - and he never would have guessed how quickly that worse would come up.

But of course he should have. His guard should never be down. He knows this.

She reaches for him and although Nemeon knows better he does not move away fast enough. She cannot know how it is not his prison of nighttime that makes him lonely, but his own poisonous body - and he so desperately wishes to exist in a world where he can be comforted, or give comfort, and not cause more harm.

There is so much that he would give for a friendly touch to his shoulder but of course it is never him that makes the sacrifice - it is always them. And though she does not say anything, she pulls abruptly away and he knows why.

Nemeon never thinks he has enough heart left to break but here he is, after thousands of small tragedies, and there is still a piece left to shatter.

All the rationality about how she is (presumably) fine because she has not collapsed, or run off, or even said anything about it cannot stand against the shame he feels. “I’m sorry.” Should he explain? Or should he just be more careful, because he is weak and lonely and wants so dearly to help a new friend for a little while longer?

He will tell her if it happens again, which it won’t because he will be more vigilant. It means not paying as much attention to their surroundings, not looking for the wolf, but he thinks this will be worth it.

“I’m Nemeon.” He offers instead, his manner subdued but still this foolish stallion does does not leave.